Marching On

Lavin shoved the hotel door open only to be blinded by the vanity lights that had been set up during the ceremony. Quickly she rushed passed the two makeup artists and into the bathroom, hastily closing the door to hide her tears.

"Lavin!"

Lavin slammed the toilet lit shut, collapsing on it. She buried her hands in his arms and her entire body shook with sobs.

A hand slammed against the door only once. "Let me in." Her voice was soft unlike her fist against the wood. "Please."

"I can't do this anymore, Gen. I can't keep lying to Harry--or to myself...that everything is going to be this perfect fairytale world," Lavin choked out.

The handle jiggled.

"We need to sort this out before the reception. Let me in, Lavin."

Lavin scoffed, pressing her palms into her eyes. "You can't expect me to go to the reception when I couldn't even handle seeing Harry at the church!"

"You can't miss that party. Can you imagine the gossip?"

Gen shook the handle again. "We can talk about this, we have time. Lavin, please open the door."

Lavin pulled herself off the toilet to unlock the door. Before Lavin had time to blink Gen burst through the door and wrapped her arms around her.

Her arms grabbed onto Gen and dug her head into her cousin's shoulders. There was nothing holding back everything she'd been holding in for the last several months.

Her cheeks burned, her eyes burned, her throat burned.

"What am I going to do?"
_____

Gen shook her head. She really had no answer for Lavin.

Her cousin was being forced to choose between the two great loves of her life; the love she has for her country and Harry.

After all these years of Harry and her being together there couldn't have been once an inkling of a warning that this situation could possibly come about, but then again no one thinks that they'll get cancer.

Lavin continued to cry.

"I want to run away. So far away."

"You know that's not an option."

"I know," Lavin admitted pathetically. "Could you imagine how wonderful that would be?"

"It would be so wonderful...for a time. But no one can run away from their problems forever," Gen told her something Lavin already knew. "Besides could you imagine the uproar in Denmark? The Farore's would probably explode, they adore you there."

"Not to mention my parents and our grandparents."

"Don't forget your brothers. Ben would be king."

A laugh bubbled out of Lavin. "Could you imagine that?"

Gen cracked a smile. "No! He'd probably let Alex have it."

Lavin pulled away and as she did Gen noticed her face. Tear stains and red eyes with a blank expression. "Let Alex have it," she repeated slowly. Her eyes were looking passed Gen, and then she smiled.

Lavin gripped Gen's shoulders, looking at Gen now. "There is one thing that I can do that will let me be with Harry."

"What's that?" Gen asked cautiously. The look in Lavin's eyes made her fear the answer.

"I can abdicate." Lavin turned towards the mirror. "I can just give it up."

"No," Gen said, her voice low and serious. Was Lavin losing her mind? Abdicating would create a crisis throughout the entire Kingdom of Denmark. Lavin was better off disappearing!

Lavin turned towards the sink, turning the faucet on. "Ben would obviously abdicate too. There is no way he would abandon his polo team."

"No. No, Lavin, that's the very last--"

"Alex would be a great king. I mean, they don't call him Alexander the Great for no reason, right?" Lavin ran her hands under the water about to wash her face.

"No, Lavin. There is no way you can abdicate!" Gen felt only her racing heart and nausea while trying to talk sense into her cousin.

Once Lavin was through washing the bleeding makeup from her face, leaving Gen in horrible suspense for two minutes.

"I know I can't do that, Gen. But for tonight, will you let me believe I do have some sort of option?" Lavin told her, locking eyes.

"You do have options..." Gen trailed lamely.

"No!" Lavin shouted. "No, I don't. And it's really sad that after all these years of being my cousin and a part of this family that you can't seem to understand that I don't have choices. All my choices have been made for me throughout my entire life no matter how much say I think I have in the matter!"

When Lavin realized Gen had nothing to say she continued:

"Just, please, let me have my happy delusion for this one night."

Gen only nodded.
____

Harry didn't ask Lavin why she and Gen arrived late. He didn't ask why the delicate skin around her eyes was puffy. He didn't even ask why she was so overtly affectionate because he couldn't help feeling the exact same way.

Lavin looked stunning in her dark blue strapless gown and all he wanted to do was be near her, touch her, kiss her after him being away.

"Why did you look so nervous this morning?" Lavin wondered as she pushed them father into a corner. Her hands were wandering down his chest.

Harry grabbed her hands, lacing their fingers. "Not here, love. As much as I want to, not here." He kissed her. "But to answer your question I had the wedding rings in my cuff. I kept thinking I lost them."

The night continued on in usual fashion until the older guests started to make their leave. As soon as his father bid them farewell Harry ordered them music louder and forced a shot of tequila on everyone.

Harry now found himself in a conversation with his drunken brother.

"Are you having fun?" Harry asked, a cold beer in his hand.

William's one hand was grasping on his shoulder while the other hand was grasping his own beer."

"Yes," he nodded his head, his face very serious. "Yes, I am. Are you--are you having fun?"

Harry nodded with a pleased smile.

"Okay, good. I just want you to have fun after that terribly cold expedition and then that fight with Lavin before you left."

"No worries, Will. Lavin and I are great. Better than great." He raised his brows suggestively. "She's all over me tonight."

"That's really great."

"Yes, I think so."

"Do you love her, Harry?" William asked, looking him square in the eye.

Harry's smile faded for a moment but then it returned. He tapped his brother's cheek with a light hand. "I love her more than anything."

"I love her too. She's a great girl, always has been," William told him. "From the chatter I've heard around the room tonight, there's a lot of talk about who will be next to tie the knot."

"Oh, really?" Harry’s interest piqued as did the butterflies in his stomach, but he played dumb. "Who would that couple be?'

William poked Harry in the chest once. "You." Then again. "And Lavin."

Harry smile wide and thought of what it would be like to be married to Lavin. Sure, he'd thought about it numerous times but now they were older and much more mature. The topic of marriage was much more relevant and present than it ever was during the days the two of them would pretend at summers spent in the countryside.
___

Lavin lived in her delusion for much of the night. She tore around the ballroom with a wide grin and a little alcohol in her bloodstream.

There was this sense of urgency when she was around Harry like she never wanted to be far from him; there was also this feeling that Harry was only a borrowed treasure--something she could have only for a little while to then return it to its rightful place.

A quiet moment found her sitting at a vacant round table staring blankly at her friends dancing in all sorts of ridiculous ways. There was Peter twirling his sister around and round. Ben had managed to coax Pippa into a dance. She saw William and Kate swaying very close to one another even though it wasn't a slow song.

"What are you doing sitting here, Lav?"

Lavin looked to her right at the now occupied seat. It was Harry.

Of course.

His jacket had come off and his tie hung limp around his neck. He brushed a piece of hair away from her face.

"You look sad."

She shook her head. "No, I'm not. I'm enjoying this moment." Lavin held her hands out wide. "They're all so perfect."

"You're weird," Harry commented plainly before smiling wide. "Come on, let’s dance."

He extended his hand. Lavin took it and he pulled her towards the dance floor. The song switched over to a Frank Sinatra song and she wrapped her arm around Harry's back.

She rested her head on Harry's chest, exhausted from pretending.

Harry began humming and then started singing only loud enough for Lavin to hear. "Keep that breathless charm...won't you please arrange it...'cause I love you...just the way you look tonight."

He stopped and they continued to move back and forth. Lavin tried to remember how warm Harry's hands were. How low and comforting his voice was. They way he smelled. The steady beat of his heart.

"Lavin," he said, close to her ear. His hot breath making a tickling her skin.

She lifted her head away from his chest, looking at her favorite shade of blue.

"You're next. We'll have all this and more."

Lavin's heart leaped. Those were the words she wanted to hear but knew that no matter what Harry and she would never be together like Kate and his brother.

She couldn't stop the tears; they welled up fast and heavy in her eyes. She watched Harry's smile falter.

"A-are you okay? I'm sorry if I said that too soon. It's just I-I mean--"

Lavin held onto Harry's face. "No," she choked and smiled. "I'm so happy, Harry. I love you so much."

She pulled him into a kiss.

She mashed her lips together, trying hard to put the way his mouth felt on hers into memory.

"Promise me something, Harry."

"Anything," Harry said, brushing her tears away.

"Always remember how much I love you; and, please never forget how much you mean to me."

Harry nodded his head. "Of course, Lavin. Always."

Lavin nodded her head again before placing it back on his chest. If she were to break up with him tomorrow at least he would know what he means to her.