Moments

So, during Tammie’s parts time is going to skip a bit. Before every time skip I’ll let you know, and I hope it isn’t confusing aha:)

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**Skip eight months**

**Tammie’s POV**

I never deleted the text. I kept it. To make sure that I’d go back… eventually. Maybe not anytime soon… A lot of people have asked me about how I’m pregnant, but I never answer any questions. I’ve kept my tabs on One Direction, Kait, Jackie and Danielle. Especially Lou. I buy every magazine I find, checking up on them. Whenever I hear their names, I stop to listen. Madison tells me that I should go back, but it’s not only bad for Lou and the boys, but for my baby boy too. He doesn’t need that kind of life. He’d pretty much be raised by me anyway, except with Lou around sometimes. I couldn’t handle that life, my dad randomly popping in here and there. I wouldn’t make my son go through what I did.

I’ve been writing letters to Lou. I haven’t sent them, but once a week I write a letter about how my week was. Different things that happened, cravings, anything I thought of. I miss him like crazy. I want to go to him, but I can’t. My son can’t be put into that life. Currently, I sat down in my living room with a notebook on the table, a pen next to it.

Dear Lou,

I hate this. I love our son, of course. He’s amazing. I hate not being with you, when I imagined this… I imagined us in our own house, you by my side over protectively. That’s how every girl pictures it though, huh? With the one they love by their side. Not their mum or friend. I still haven’t talked to Kait; she refuses to talk to me. I don’t blame her. I don’t blame any of the guys or Danielle for not talking to me at all. Or Jackie, Jackie deserves to come and hurt me. I hope I didn’t hurt her feelings at all, I probably did but what’s done is done.

I still don’t know what to name him. I thought about calling you, and asking you what you thought, but then decided against it. If you named him you’d never be able to leave. I miss you all so much. I miss everything about you. From your smile, to the stubble on your face when you don’t shave for a few days. No matter how many times I told you I hated it, I’d deal with it if I could have you and our baby boy. I’d put up with anything, I’d give the world.

How’s everyone? I’ve been keeping my tabs on you boys, as well as Jackie, Danielle and Kaitlynn. Tumblr works wonders sometimes. I’m not so sure if it’s true… but I hope it is. I hope that you guys are having as much fun as it looks.

I have to get going; I have a doctor’s appointment.

Love always,

Tammie.

“Mum,” I said walking into the kitchen where I was called. “Come on! Last one for now!” She said excitedly getting her coat. I laughed a bit, shaking my head and going to put my shoes on and follow her to her car.

“Your baby is healthy.” The doctor said to me with a smile. I let out a sigh of relief. “Do you think I could get some of the pictures?” I asked her, smiling shyly. She nodded. “For the daddy?” She asked. My smile fell and I felt my throat go dry. “I’ll probably send one to him, yes.” I said softly, looking down at the goo on my belly. I grabbed a paper towel and wiped it off, letting my shirt fall. “Are you going to send Lou one, really?” My mum asked from the chair next to the table. I nodded slowly. “I’ll mail it to Kait and ask her to give it to him. He deserves to know what’s going on… I have letters for him too.” I said, biting my lip. I don’t know if I’ll send those. But I put all the pictures with the letters. I shook my head; I won’t be sending those letters. The pictures, yes. On the back I wrote how far along I was at the time too, so he’ll probably appreciate it.

The next day I put the pictures in an envelope and wrote Kait’s address on them, sticking a short letter in, asking her to give the pictures to Lou and pass my love to everyone and my dearest apologies. I waited for the mailman, seeing him down the street and handed him my letter, smiling at him nicely. He took it without a smile and gave me our mail, driving away.

Three weeks later, I sat with my friends in my room, watching a movie. I could hear my mum downstairs, she always makes sure someone’s here in case… in case my baby boy decides it’s time to come into the world. My due date is tomorrow, June 9th. So, if you can’t tell, I’m a nervous wreck. My baby is due any day, and I don’t take pain too kindly. I nervously put a hand on my bulging stomach. “You’ll be okay.” Madison said, smiling over at me. I smiled back, looking down at my stomach. “I’m worried about him.” I said, before looking up as Dory forgot something else. I love this movie.

Three hours later my friends left and I sat with my mum in the kitchen at our table, talking. My brother soon joined us and I felt like I belonged, for the first time since I’ve left London. Like this is where I should be, with my family. But of course, the moment had to be ruined right? I felt a pain in my lower abdomen, it moved to my entire body and I gasped, closing my eyes tightly. “Fuck,” My brother muttered, looking over at me. “I’m fine.” I said as the pain went away. I took a deep breath and smiled over at him. “Just a little thing, don’t worry about me.” I told him. But of course, the next time I was in pain my brother picked me up and brought me to his car with my mum as well, driving me to the hospital.

“Mum! Call Lou.” I said as I was wheeled into the emergency room, still holding my stomach. She nodded, taking my phone and pressing a few buttons. I heard her tell someone that I’m going into labor then she caught up, saying that Lou’s on his way. “I’m waiting for him.” I said to them wincing as pain went through my body again.

“Be ready for another contraction.” The doctor said an hour later. I nodded, waiting for the pain. “You’re still not even close to being ready to give birth,” He told me apologetically. I nodded. “Good, I need to wait for— Aah!” The pain came and I sucked in my breath, rubbing my stomach. “Shh.. Shh, careful.” I said to my baby. “Don’t hurt mommy.” I pleaded softly, still rubbing my belly.

Another four hours passed, still not ready to give birth, but getting closer. A few hours ago they gave me pain meds, but it barely helped. I heard some shouting going on from outside the door and I looked up as the door opened and Lou ran in. He had huge bags under his eyes and his hair was a bit longer and extremely messy. “Tam,” He said, running over. His medical gown flowing behind him as he took my hand in his. “How is she?” He asked the doctor. “And our boy?” He added, not looking at me, but instead at the doctor. “She’s been in labor for five hours,” He said, causing Lou to suck in his breath. “The baby’s fine, just not quite ready to come out.” He said, smiling a bit. “Everything should go fine, just as long as we do it at the right time.” The doctor finished and Lou let out a steady breath, smiling down at me. More tears came to my eyes and his smile fell, “What’s wrong? Are you okay? Doc, can we get her medication?” He asked, his eyes frantically moving around the room. I laughed a bit. “I’m fine; it’s just… been a while since I’ve seen you. I’m so happy to see you, Lou.” I said, smiling up at him. He knelt down next to the bed and kissed my forehead. “I missed you too.” He said, smiling brightly. “Contraction coming,” The doctor said and I cursed a bit under my breath, my right hand moving to rub my stomach. I clutched Lou’s hand in my left one, squeezing tightly as the contraction came. “Almost ready!” The doctor said to us. I ignored him, closing my eyes and trying to focus on anything but the pain. “Holy fuck, holy fuck.” Lou said softly under his breath. The pain soon went away and I leaned my head back, my eyes still closed. I heard a voice from outside yelling at someone. “I put the god damned dress on, let me in!!!” Kait yelled loudly. “Babe, calm down.” A familiar Irish voice said, probably to Kait. “No! I will not calm down! I want to see her!!! I deserve to see her! Right now or I’ll… I’ll… I’ll do something bad!!!” She shouted louder, and soon enough she was running through the door. I noticed the rest of the guys outside, not in gowns and the door closed after Harry gave me an encouraging smile. So Kait explained my thinking, I suppose. “How long?” She asked Lou. “For five hours.” He responded and I looked over at Kait. “I’m so sorry.” I whispered, tears falling out of my eyes.

“Oh shh!” She said, running to my other side. “It’s okay!” She said, kissing my cheek and taking my hand in two of hers. “Okay, the next contraction is coming. We’ll need you to push.” the doctor said, causing my eyes to open wide and my head to nod a bit. I felt the dull pain and pushed, causing more pain. I squeezed Lou and Kait’s hands, trying to not scream or break them.

“God fucking damn you, Lou!” I yelled after the pain went away. “We’ll have to do that a few more times.” The doctor said and I felt a nurse dab my head with a cloth. “I fucking hate you, Lou!” I shouted at him, grinding my teeth. “I know, I’m sorry baby.” He said, rubbing circles onto the back of my hand. “I wish you didn’t have to go through this.” He said to me. I glared at him, “Me fucking too!” I said, causing Kait to laugh a bit. I smiled, looking over at her. “I’ve missed you so much.” I told her with a light laugh.

**Louis’ POV**

I smiled at the sleeping Tammie, her stomach back to its flat self and our baby currently being cleaned up. Kait smiled at me and walked over to me, engulfing me in a hug. “Good job, daddy.” She whispered, kissing my cheek and pulling away. “Thanks, auntie.” I said with a smile. She smiled before walking out of the room. I followed behind her, taking off my gown as I went to reveal my clothes. Once I got to the waiting room everyone looked up at me. I smiled happily, my eyes watering. “It’s a boy.” I said as everyone cheered and ran over to hug me.

“Mr. Tomlinson, would you like to hold your baby?” A nurse asked me, breaking me away from my friends and family. I nodded, following her to Tammie’s room where I saw a nurse feeding my baby. She smiled at me, standing up and passing him over. “You okay?” She asked and I nodded, having held my little sisters plenty of times and feeding them as well. I smiled down at my boy, he had my face shape and by the looks of it, my hair that was poking out of his hat. I nodded to the nurses who left and I fed my boy, looking out the window and back down to my boy.

A few hours later, Tammie still hadn’t woken up and I spent the time cuddling and playing with my boy. After an hour everyone came in, in pairs to look at him. After everyone held him everyone was allowed in, as long as they all sat down and weren’t loud. “They’re so cute.” I could hear Kait whisper to Niall every once in a while as I smiled down at my boy, Niall would agree with a smile and kiss Kait’s forehead. Harry and Jackie just smiled, watching me and knowing the feeling as Junior was at home with his Auntie Gemma. Liam and Danielle would watch, the diamond ring sparkling on Danielle’s finger as she’d tell Liam that she wanted a plethora of children one day and he’d smile widely, kissing her delicately.

After about half an hour of me talking with everyone, peeking down at my boy every once in a while, I heard noises coming out of his mouth. I looked down in amazement as his eyes opened, to reveal two blue orbs that resembled mine exactly. From the shape, to the size to the color.

This would be perfect.

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