Don't You Want the Way I Feel for You?
Chapter 15 Baby It's Cold Outside
“Okay so four pairs of jeans, seven sweaters, three coats, six cardis, and a large assortment of cami’s, hats, gloves and scarves. Do you think that’ll be good?” I asked.
“We’re going to New York and then to my parents for five days not five years.” Darren chuckled from where he was sitting on my bed.
Darren and I had had our meeting with Ryan last week. He told us that Fox was asked to send two of their actors to perform in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade and Ryan thought it would be nice if Darren and I went. He initially wanted Darren and Chris to go but due to scheduling conflicts I would be going instead. Darren and I would be boarding a flight at five am the next morning and then flying back to LA. My parents had taken a trip to the Bahamas for their 25th anniversary over Thanksgiving and my brother was going to Colorado with his wife to have dinner at her parents’ house. I was planning on having dinner at Lily’s parents but Darren’s mom and dad were insisting I have dinner with them.
So here we were the night before we fly to New York and I’m packing my suitcase and apparently packing too heavy.
“Look I just need choices so I’m taking well-“
“Everything?” Darren offered.
“Oh you shut up.”
“Nope I will not do that. Hurry up with the packing I’m so hungry” he whined
“When are you not?”
“Uh, never?”
“Right, obvious answer.” I said rolling my eyes.
I filled my second suitcase as much as I could and packed all of my makeup, toiletries, and various hair appliances into another small duffel bag. I zipped the last suit case closed and stood back smiling.
“Okay I’m good.”
“Good lord. Three bags? I barely filled one and a half.”
“You’re a boy it’s different.”
“Whatever you say, love. Now can we eat?”
“Oh my goodness, yes. Now we can eat.”
Darren and I put my bags in the back of his car and tried to decide where we wanted to go for dinner.
“I want to go to the Cheesecake Factory. Like, so bad I can’t even describe it.” Darren said while buckling his seatbelt.
“You know we can’t.”
“Why not?” he said while backing out of the driveway.
“Because. If we keep going out to eat and things like that we might as well just confirm to the press that we’re dating.”
“Well, I’ve been thinking about that…”
“And?” I said looking over at him from the passenger seat.
“Maybe we should. It would make our lives much easier. Everyone on set knows, our friends and family. The only ones who don’t are the press and the fans.”
“I’ll get hate mail every day, you seriously don’t tumble at all.”
“Tumble?”
“Tumblr. When I first created mine back in my fan days I followed a few different fan blogs and let me tell you, your fans are intense.”
“Look, I love my fans to death. And if they really want to support me and all that I do then they’ll support me being with you and they’ll love you as much as I do.”
“What?” I said suddenly.
“What, what?” Darren laughed.
“I just thought that you said…never mind it’s not important.”
“Okay crazy lady.” Darren said while turning into the parking lot of the Cheesecake Factory.
Darren totally just indirectly said that he loved me. That happened like I didn’t imagine it. I mean I’m pretty sure I’m in love with him but, is telling him that after only being together for a month too much? They aren’t just words at least not to me. I’ve only ever told one other person I love them in that way and we were together for almost three years.
“Helllooooooooo?”
I snapped out of my intense thinking clusterfuck and realized Darren was standing outside my door waving his hands in my face.
“Oh! I’m sorry I just zoned out.”
“Everything okay?”
“Yeah everything’s fine I was just thinking is all.”
“Thinking about what?” he asked while taking my hand and pulling me out of my seat.
“Nothing, really it was nothing.”
“Are you sure?” he said looking a little concerned.
“I’m positive. Let’s go in I am so hungry.”
Darren took my hand and we walked across the parking lot to the entrance of the restaurant. I’ve never gotten to hold Darren’s hand when we’ve gone out before. And it feels…really nice. I love that I can tell anyone I want that he’s mine and I’m his.
Darren smiled at me and held the door open for me. I smiled back and walked inside. The place was packed and there were about fifty people waiting in line with menus and little buzzers in their hands.
“Wow, Dar, it’s so crowded. Do you just want to go somewhere else?”
“As pompous as this sounds, I don’t think we’ll have a problem getting a table.” Darren said leading me up to the front desk and as soon as the two girls saw him their faces lit up.
“Hello Mr.Criss.”
“How many?” they both smiled eagerly at him.
“They’ll be two of us.” He smiled back.
“Absolutely, right this way.” The one girl picked up two menus and gestured for us to follow her. She lead us to our table and smiled again before heading back to the front of the restaurant.
“I feel like such a dick right now.” I said looking at him over my menu.
“I know and I do feel bad but I seriously didn’t even ask to be seated immediately I would’ve waited but she kind of insisted.” He said.
“I guess so but still I don’t want this to be a habit ya know?”
“Of course not, babe.”
“So…I’m a little nervous.”
“About what? The parade.”
I hadn’t even thought about the parade performance
“Well great now that you mentioned it I am. But I was talking about meeting your family.”
“Oh stop they’ll love you. I’ve told them all about you and my mom has been begging me to bring you home to meet her and my dad. Chuck’s flying in too.”
“Your brother?”
“Yeah for the first time in like three years he isn’t on tour tomorrow so he’ll be there for dinner too.”
“Oh great, more people to impress and potentially embarrass myself in front of.”
Darren reached across the table and took my hand, “Please stop worrying. I promise, they’ll love you and you’ll love them.”
I sighed and smiled back at him, “Alright alright.”
Darren and I ate until we couldn’t possible fit anything else in our stomachs from salad to our huge slice of strawberry cheesecake. Darren paid the bill, despite my protests to split it, and we started making our way out of the restaurant. As soon as we opened the door to walk to the car we were swarmed by cameras. People must’ve tipped off the press that we were having dinner.
“Darren over here!”
“Darren!”
“Autumn this way!”
“Autumn are you and Darren together?!”
“Darren what is your relationship status!?”
Darren and I stood there for a minute or so and smiled and let the press take their pictures and Darren finally said
“Yes, Autumn and I are together and I am currently taken,” he kissed my cheek, “and very happy.”
I smiled like an idiot and squeezed Darren’s hand. We worked out way through the crowd of reporters and photographers and finally made it to the safety of Darren’s car.
“That wasn’t so bad right?” he asked me while putting the key in the ignition.
“No I guess not.” I smiled at him.
“It’s going to be fine, love.”
.
….
………
……………..
“Ugh oh my god slow down!” I huffed. I was currently pushing a luggage cart with my many bags and Darren was practically RUNNING in front of me with his carry on and wheeling his suitcase behind him.
“Come on slow poke! We need to get a cab and get to the hotel. We have rehearsal for the parade at four.”
“Darren, it is almost eleven am. I have been up since three and I’m ready to fall over. I am tired, I am grumpy, I am COLD and I have yet to have a cup of coffee. Fix it.”
By this time we had gotten to the sidewalk of JFK and Darren was hailing a cab.
“Hunnie, come on we’ll get coffee later, just get in the cab.” He said while starting to put our luggage in the trunk of the cab.
“No.” I said planting my feet and crossing my arms.
“Autumn, please get in the cab.”
“NO!” I whined.
“GET IN THE CAB! GET IN! GET IN THE CAB!”
I just stood there looking at him. Raising your voice? Nope, not working on me.
“I’m sorry baby please just get in the cab.” He said giving me his best puppy dog face.
I can’t resist that face no matter how cranky I am. I gave a deep sigh and sunk into the backseat of the cab. Darren climbed in behind me and put his arm around me. I yawned and snuggled into him.
“Sleepy?” he asked and then kissed the top of my head.
“Mhmmm” I yawned.
“Well close your eyes for a little while, I’ll wake you when we get there.”
I did as I was told and was passed out in about thirty seconds. After we arrived at the hotel and checked in and unpacked Darren and I grabbed a late lunch and then went to our rehearsal for the parade. Our float was towards the end of the parade and of course it was Christmas themed. The two of us would be singing ‘Baby it’s cold outside’. The float had a cute living room scene set up very similar to the one they used on The Glee Project. Darren and I practiced our song just standing by the piano a few times and then we moved to the float itself to practice with the background track. Darren was basically chasing me all over the float, spinning around, holding my hands and dancing with me. Basically, it was three minutes of cuteness and I can’t wait to do it tomorrow for the parade.
Another early wakeup call greeted me on Thursday morning. Darren and I would be riding on the float through the entire parade and the float would be stopping in the middle of Times Square for our live performance. No pressure right? We would be sitting on our cute little couch in front of the fake fireplace and all bundled up together. And let me tell you it is cold in New York City this morning. This California girl does not go back east very often and there is a reason for it.
“I am bundling up today.” I said wrapping a scarf around my neck.
Autumn’s outfit:
http://www.polyvore.com/autumn-parade/set?id=39926640
Darren looked over at me,
“Aw so festive with the red and white.”
I smiled back at him. Darren looked so warm and cozy and just so handsome in his gray wool coat.
Darren’s outfit:
http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=39927392
“Well we are singing a Christmas song.”
“Ready to go?”
“Yes I am” I said taking his hand.
.
…..
………..
……………………
Darren and I were seated on the couch on our float smiling and waving to the crowd like our lives depended on it. We had been having such a good time that I had almost forgotten about how nervous I was for our performance, key word being almost. The float came to a stop and we were given microphones from two of the parade workers. Darren and I took our starting positions, me standing on the edge of the float facing out towards the crowd, and Darren standing back next to the couch. The music started playing and I looked over my shoulder at him with a flirty smile and started to sing.
“I really can’t stay..”
“But baby it’s cold outside..”
“I’ve got to go away..”
“But baby it’s cold outside.” Darren started walking towards me and twirled around him and back to the couch. He smiled and went to follow me.
“This evening has been…”
“Been hoping that you’d drop in…”
“So very nice.” Darren snuck up behind me and spun me around to face him holding my hands.
“I’ll hold your hands, they’re just like ice…”
I started backing up and Darren kept stepping towards smiling. I took two steps and Darren mirrored me.
“My mother will start to worry…” two more steps backwards.
“Beautiful, what’s your hurry?” two more steps towards me.
“My father will be pacing the floor…” I bumped into the armrest of the couch and Darren inched up to be right in front of me again.
“Listen to the fireplace roar…”
“So really I’d better scurry…”
“Beautiful, please don't hurry…”
“Well maybe just a half a drink more…” I leaned in as if I was about to kiss him
“Put some records on while I pour” Darren leaned in as well and just as our lips were about to touch I skipped around him and to the other side of the couch.
Darren and I sang through the next verse and after the signature phrase of ‘Baby it’s cold outside’ Darren spun me in to him and we danced, his one arm around my waist, my hand on his shoulder while our other hands were grasped together. Darren danced me in a little circle as the background track played. I sat down on the couch and started the next verse. Darren sat next to me and I started scooching in the opposite direction.
“I've got to go home…”
“But, baby, you'll freeze out there…”
“Say, lend me your coat..” I moved over a couch cushion
“It's up to your knees out there..” Darren moved again so he was next to me
“You've really been grand…”
“ I'm thrilled when you touch my hand…” Darren walked his fingers towards my hand that was resting on the couch but I playfully pulled it away before he could reach.
“But don't you see?”
“How can you do this thing to me?”
“There's bound to be talk tomorrow…” I walked to the other side of the couch and Darren mirrored me on the other side.
“Think of my life long sorrow…
“At least there will be plenty implied…” I started walking toward the center of the float in front of the couch.
“If you caught pneumonia and died..” Darren met me in the middle and took my hand.
I shook my head and smiled at him, “I really can't stay…”
“Get over that hold out…”
“Ohhh…” Darren twirled me under his arm
“Baby it's cold outside.”
I went to finish the number as planned. Darren extended his arm all the way out and I spun into to but to my surprised when I spun in Darren was holding mistletoe above our heads. He leaned in and gave me a light kiss on the lips. I could feel the warmth in my cheeks and I just shook my head and laughed. The crowd of people was going wild and I seriously felt like I could run four marathons without stopping I had that much adrenaline. Darren and I took a little bow and returned to our spot on the couch as the parade progressed on through the city.
“Where did that come from?!” I said poking him in the side.
“Just spreading a little holiday cheer.” He said grinning.
He can spread his cheer whenever he wants…
“We’re going to New York and then to my parents for five days not five years.” Darren chuckled from where he was sitting on my bed.
Darren and I had had our meeting with Ryan last week. He told us that Fox was asked to send two of their actors to perform in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade and Ryan thought it would be nice if Darren and I went. He initially wanted Darren and Chris to go but due to scheduling conflicts I would be going instead. Darren and I would be boarding a flight at five am the next morning and then flying back to LA. My parents had taken a trip to the Bahamas for their 25th anniversary over Thanksgiving and my brother was going to Colorado with his wife to have dinner at her parents’ house. I was planning on having dinner at Lily’s parents but Darren’s mom and dad were insisting I have dinner with them.
So here we were the night before we fly to New York and I’m packing my suitcase and apparently packing too heavy.
“Look I just need choices so I’m taking well-“
“Everything?” Darren offered.
“Oh you shut up.”
“Nope I will not do that. Hurry up with the packing I’m so hungry” he whined
“When are you not?”
“Uh, never?”
“Right, obvious answer.” I said rolling my eyes.
I filled my second suitcase as much as I could and packed all of my makeup, toiletries, and various hair appliances into another small duffel bag. I zipped the last suit case closed and stood back smiling.
“Okay I’m good.”
“Good lord. Three bags? I barely filled one and a half.”
“You’re a boy it’s different.”
“Whatever you say, love. Now can we eat?”
“Oh my goodness, yes. Now we can eat.”
Darren and I put my bags in the back of his car and tried to decide where we wanted to go for dinner.
“I want to go to the Cheesecake Factory. Like, so bad I can’t even describe it.” Darren said while buckling his seatbelt.
“You know we can’t.”
“Why not?” he said while backing out of the driveway.
“Because. If we keep going out to eat and things like that we might as well just confirm to the press that we’re dating.”
“Well, I’ve been thinking about that…”
“And?” I said looking over at him from the passenger seat.
“Maybe we should. It would make our lives much easier. Everyone on set knows, our friends and family. The only ones who don’t are the press and the fans.”
“I’ll get hate mail every day, you seriously don’t tumble at all.”
“Tumble?”
“Tumblr. When I first created mine back in my fan days I followed a few different fan blogs and let me tell you, your fans are intense.”
“Look, I love my fans to death. And if they really want to support me and all that I do then they’ll support me being with you and they’ll love you as much as I do.”
“What?” I said suddenly.
“What, what?” Darren laughed.
“I just thought that you said…never mind it’s not important.”
“Okay crazy lady.” Darren said while turning into the parking lot of the Cheesecake Factory.
Darren totally just indirectly said that he loved me. That happened like I didn’t imagine it. I mean I’m pretty sure I’m in love with him but, is telling him that after only being together for a month too much? They aren’t just words at least not to me. I’ve only ever told one other person I love them in that way and we were together for almost three years.
“Helllooooooooo?”
I snapped out of my intense thinking clusterfuck and realized Darren was standing outside my door waving his hands in my face.
“Oh! I’m sorry I just zoned out.”
“Everything okay?”
“Yeah everything’s fine I was just thinking is all.”
“Thinking about what?” he asked while taking my hand and pulling me out of my seat.
“Nothing, really it was nothing.”
“Are you sure?” he said looking a little concerned.
“I’m positive. Let’s go in I am so hungry.”
Darren took my hand and we walked across the parking lot to the entrance of the restaurant. I’ve never gotten to hold Darren’s hand when we’ve gone out before. And it feels…really nice. I love that I can tell anyone I want that he’s mine and I’m his.
Darren smiled at me and held the door open for me. I smiled back and walked inside. The place was packed and there were about fifty people waiting in line with menus and little buzzers in their hands.
“Wow, Dar, it’s so crowded. Do you just want to go somewhere else?”
“As pompous as this sounds, I don’t think we’ll have a problem getting a table.” Darren said leading me up to the front desk and as soon as the two girls saw him their faces lit up.
“Hello Mr.Criss.”
“How many?” they both smiled eagerly at him.
“They’ll be two of us.” He smiled back.
“Absolutely, right this way.” The one girl picked up two menus and gestured for us to follow her. She lead us to our table and smiled again before heading back to the front of the restaurant.
“I feel like such a dick right now.” I said looking at him over my menu.
“I know and I do feel bad but I seriously didn’t even ask to be seated immediately I would’ve waited but she kind of insisted.” He said.
“I guess so but still I don’t want this to be a habit ya know?”
“Of course not, babe.”
“So…I’m a little nervous.”
“About what? The parade.”
I hadn’t even thought about the parade performance
“Well great now that you mentioned it I am. But I was talking about meeting your family.”
“Oh stop they’ll love you. I’ve told them all about you and my mom has been begging me to bring you home to meet her and my dad. Chuck’s flying in too.”
“Your brother?”
“Yeah for the first time in like three years he isn’t on tour tomorrow so he’ll be there for dinner too.”
“Oh great, more people to impress and potentially embarrass myself in front of.”
Darren reached across the table and took my hand, “Please stop worrying. I promise, they’ll love you and you’ll love them.”
I sighed and smiled back at him, “Alright alright.”
Darren and I ate until we couldn’t possible fit anything else in our stomachs from salad to our huge slice of strawberry cheesecake. Darren paid the bill, despite my protests to split it, and we started making our way out of the restaurant. As soon as we opened the door to walk to the car we were swarmed by cameras. People must’ve tipped off the press that we were having dinner.
“Darren over here!”
“Darren!”
“Autumn this way!”
“Autumn are you and Darren together?!”
“Darren what is your relationship status!?”
Darren and I stood there for a minute or so and smiled and let the press take their pictures and Darren finally said
“Yes, Autumn and I are together and I am currently taken,” he kissed my cheek, “and very happy.”
I smiled like an idiot and squeezed Darren’s hand. We worked out way through the crowd of reporters and photographers and finally made it to the safety of Darren’s car.
“That wasn’t so bad right?” he asked me while putting the key in the ignition.
“No I guess not.” I smiled at him.
“It’s going to be fine, love.”
.
….
………
……………..
“Ugh oh my god slow down!” I huffed. I was currently pushing a luggage cart with my many bags and Darren was practically RUNNING in front of me with his carry on and wheeling his suitcase behind him.
“Come on slow poke! We need to get a cab and get to the hotel. We have rehearsal for the parade at four.”
“Darren, it is almost eleven am. I have been up since three and I’m ready to fall over. I am tired, I am grumpy, I am COLD and I have yet to have a cup of coffee. Fix it.”
By this time we had gotten to the sidewalk of JFK and Darren was hailing a cab.
“Hunnie, come on we’ll get coffee later, just get in the cab.” He said while starting to put our luggage in the trunk of the cab.
“No.” I said planting my feet and crossing my arms.
“Autumn, please get in the cab.”
“NO!” I whined.
“GET IN THE CAB! GET IN! GET IN THE CAB!”
I just stood there looking at him. Raising your voice? Nope, not working on me.
“I’m sorry baby please just get in the cab.” He said giving me his best puppy dog face.
I can’t resist that face no matter how cranky I am. I gave a deep sigh and sunk into the backseat of the cab. Darren climbed in behind me and put his arm around me. I yawned and snuggled into him.
“Sleepy?” he asked and then kissed the top of my head.
“Mhmmm” I yawned.
“Well close your eyes for a little while, I’ll wake you when we get there.”
I did as I was told and was passed out in about thirty seconds. After we arrived at the hotel and checked in and unpacked Darren and I grabbed a late lunch and then went to our rehearsal for the parade. Our float was towards the end of the parade and of course it was Christmas themed. The two of us would be singing ‘Baby it’s cold outside’. The float had a cute living room scene set up very similar to the one they used on The Glee Project. Darren and I practiced our song just standing by the piano a few times and then we moved to the float itself to practice with the background track. Darren was basically chasing me all over the float, spinning around, holding my hands and dancing with me. Basically, it was three minutes of cuteness and I can’t wait to do it tomorrow for the parade.
Another early wakeup call greeted me on Thursday morning. Darren and I would be riding on the float through the entire parade and the float would be stopping in the middle of Times Square for our live performance. No pressure right? We would be sitting on our cute little couch in front of the fake fireplace and all bundled up together. And let me tell you it is cold in New York City this morning. This California girl does not go back east very often and there is a reason for it.
“I am bundling up today.” I said wrapping a scarf around my neck.
Autumn’s outfit:
http://www.polyvore.com/autumn-parade/set?id=39926640
Darren looked over at me,
“Aw so festive with the red and white.”
I smiled back at him. Darren looked so warm and cozy and just so handsome in his gray wool coat.
Darren’s outfit:
http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=39927392
“Well we are singing a Christmas song.”
“Ready to go?”
“Yes I am” I said taking his hand.
.
…..
………..
……………………
Darren and I were seated on the couch on our float smiling and waving to the crowd like our lives depended on it. We had been having such a good time that I had almost forgotten about how nervous I was for our performance, key word being almost. The float came to a stop and we were given microphones from two of the parade workers. Darren and I took our starting positions, me standing on the edge of the float facing out towards the crowd, and Darren standing back next to the couch. The music started playing and I looked over my shoulder at him with a flirty smile and started to sing.
“I really can’t stay..”
“But baby it’s cold outside..”
“I’ve got to go away..”
“But baby it’s cold outside.” Darren started walking towards me and twirled around him and back to the couch. He smiled and went to follow me.
“This evening has been…”
“Been hoping that you’d drop in…”
“So very nice.” Darren snuck up behind me and spun me around to face him holding my hands.
“I’ll hold your hands, they’re just like ice…”
I started backing up and Darren kept stepping towards smiling. I took two steps and Darren mirrored me.
“My mother will start to worry…” two more steps backwards.
“Beautiful, what’s your hurry?” two more steps towards me.
“My father will be pacing the floor…” I bumped into the armrest of the couch and Darren inched up to be right in front of me again.
“Listen to the fireplace roar…”
“So really I’d better scurry…”
“Beautiful, please don't hurry…”
“Well maybe just a half a drink more…” I leaned in as if I was about to kiss him
“Put some records on while I pour” Darren leaned in as well and just as our lips were about to touch I skipped around him and to the other side of the couch.
Darren and I sang through the next verse and after the signature phrase of ‘Baby it’s cold outside’ Darren spun me in to him and we danced, his one arm around my waist, my hand on his shoulder while our other hands were grasped together. Darren danced me in a little circle as the background track played. I sat down on the couch and started the next verse. Darren sat next to me and I started scooching in the opposite direction.
“I've got to go home…”
“But, baby, you'll freeze out there…”
“Say, lend me your coat..” I moved over a couch cushion
“It's up to your knees out there..” Darren moved again so he was next to me
“You've really been grand…”
“ I'm thrilled when you touch my hand…” Darren walked his fingers towards my hand that was resting on the couch but I playfully pulled it away before he could reach.
“But don't you see?”
“How can you do this thing to me?”
“There's bound to be talk tomorrow…” I walked to the other side of the couch and Darren mirrored me on the other side.
“Think of my life long sorrow…
“At least there will be plenty implied…” I started walking toward the center of the float in front of the couch.
“If you caught pneumonia and died..” Darren met me in the middle and took my hand.
I shook my head and smiled at him, “I really can't stay…”
“Get over that hold out…”
“Ohhh…” Darren twirled me under his arm
“Baby it's cold outside.”
I went to finish the number as planned. Darren extended his arm all the way out and I spun into to but to my surprised when I spun in Darren was holding mistletoe above our heads. He leaned in and gave me a light kiss on the lips. I could feel the warmth in my cheeks and I just shook my head and laughed. The crowd of people was going wild and I seriously felt like I could run four marathons without stopping I had that much adrenaline. Darren and I took a little bow and returned to our spot on the couch as the parade progressed on through the city.
“Where did that come from?!” I said poking him in the side.
“Just spreading a little holiday cheer.” He said grinning.
He can spread his cheer whenever he wants…