This is How it Goes

The kid running into me knocked the wind out of me. I had to struggle to catch my breath, but after a few tries, I succeeded.
Alex held onto my elbow to keep me steady.
But a massive wave of somberness hit me with a crash so hard that I fell back onto my butt.
Alex looked down at me with concern in his mud brown eyes. "Ally, what's wrong?" he asked.
I looked back at him with confusion. Now that I think about it, I have no idea what just happened.
Alex crouched down next to me and put his left hand on the small of my back with his other hand on my thigh, steadying himself. "Are you okay?"
"I don't know."
When I was able to regain my balance, I stood up and stared at the little boy. He seemed to shrink down in dismay.
"What is your name?" Penn asked the child.
"Christian," the boy spoke in a barely audible whisper.
"How old are you?" I asked, trying to be valiant.
"I think I'm six." Christian looked uncertain. So he really is younger than Carson. "My parents have been dead for years and I lost count of the years after."
Losing all bravado, I let a tear slip from my eye and I sink towards the ground. This boy is an orphan, and I now know how that feels.
While hugging my knees to my chest, Alex comes over and comforts me.
But the attention is short-lived when Christian faints.
Everyone gathers around his lifeless body, waiting for any sign of waking.

Finally, Christian's eyes flutter open in shock a few minutes later. All childlike glints in his eyes were gone, replaced with fear.
And when Christian broke down in tears, all I could say was, "I know how you feel."