Status: Sooo I pretty much update when I want but since it's summer, I'm trying to update more.. :)

Guys Like You Make Us Look Bad.

You Scream "Don't Look."

I was playing outside with my now ex-best friend, Ali, when my father called me inside for the night. I was 9 years old at the time. I said goodbye to Ali and went inside.

My dad was sitting on the couch, drinking a beer. I knew, even at 9 years old, not to make my dad mad when he was drinking. I saw him hit my mom once. I didn't want him to hit me.

My mom isn't around that much. She was running for Senator at the time so she was always working. She doesn't pay that much attention to me but I know she loves me.

I said goodnight to my dad and went upstairs to my room. Right now my mom is on a business trip so I got dressed by myself and climbed into bed. I laid there for a while just listening to the wind outside when my father opened up my door. I sat up confused for a second.

"Daddy, what are you doing?" I said, rubbing my eyes.
"Shh, baby. I need you to do something for me." He said. I nodded, wondering what he was going to make me do at such a late time.

When he first started with.... What he was doing, I didn't know it was wrong. All I know is that he told me not to tell my mom. That it was our little secret. I didn't learn it was bad until a year later. We had one of those ladies from Social Services come into my school to tell us about it and how it was wrong.

That was the first time I ever fought back to my father. That night when he came into my room I told him no. He beat me until I listened. That's when he started hitting me.

My mom didn't notice. She was gone all the time, on business trips and doing conferences. I didn't get the love from my mom like I needed.

When I was 14, I lost my virginity. No, I am not a slut. I was raped. My father raped me. Because of him I cannot be around touched by men. My father beats me still but he stopped raping and molesting me when I was 15.

I got pregnant. By my own father. When he found out, he punched me in my stomach, killing my baby. No one ever found out because I was so early into the pregnancy.

Now, I am 19 years old. I am so screwed up beyond relief. But I try to be as normal as possible. I am a photography major in college. I express what I feel through pictures.

I cut and am a bulimic.

I am so screwed up, no one can help me anymore.

-------------------------
My alarm buzzed loudly and I jumped up from my bed. Too fast though because the sudden movement made the fresh bruises on my ribs throb in pain. I gasped from the sharp pain in my side as I moved slowly over to my dresser.

I got dressed and used makeup to cover any red marks on my face or neck. My father didn't hit me as bad last night because my mom came home right before he was done. She hasn't been home in almost a month.

I grabbed my phone and walked downstairs to see my parents, eating breakfast. "Hi honey." She said, hugging me. I plastered a fake smile on my face as I saw my father watching my every move.

"Good morning, sweetheart." He said, walking over and kissing me on the cheek. I smiled tightly, trying to hold back tears. "G-good morning, Daddy." I said, clenching my teeth. He does this every time. He pretends to love me then as soon as my mom's back is turned, I get smacked.

"Well, I really have to get to my class. I'll see you later." I grabbed my camera and my bag. I ran out the door as fast as I could to my car. I took deep breathes, trying to not have an anxiety attack.

When I was calmed down, I pulled out of the driveway and drove to my college. I got to my class early. My teacher, Mr. Marks pulled me aside when he saw me.

"Jeydan, I have great news to tell you." He smiled. Mr.Marks was the best teacher I've ever had and he's the only man I have ever been comfortable around.

"What? Am I graduating early?" I said, sarcastically. "I swear your psychic! Yes, you are." My heart stopped. I'm. Graduating.

"W-what?!" I said. A grin spread across my face. I couldn't be graduating. This is a dream. Yeah, a dream. It had to be.

"You have enough credits to graduate. Your work is outstanding. So I remembered you saying you wanted to be a band photographer..." He said, trailing off at the end. I move my hands in the 'go on' motion.

"So I sent them in to a record company. THEY WANT TO HIRE YOU!" My jaw dropped. He hugged me but I was still in shock. I was going to be making money. I could make enough and leave my house. Mr. Marks noticed I was in shock so he kept going.

"All you have to do is go to the Dean's office and get your diploma. He probably has already called your parents." I came out of my state of shock when he said that.

"Oh, um, okay. YES! I'M GRADUATING!! So what do I do about this record company?" He handed me a card.

"Just call this number and tell them your name. They'll tell you what to do." I nodded. "Now hurry on, graduate." He said, hugging me again. I waved and walked away to the Dean's office.

The lady at the desk asked for my name then sent me into the Dean's room. "Hi, you must be Jeydan Drake." He said, motioning for me to sit down. I nodded.

"Well, Jeydan, we have decided to give you your diploma early because, by judging your work you are already qualified to work as a photographer. I have already notified your parents and they are very proud." I resisted rolling my eyes. He handed me a piece of paper. It was my diploma.

"Thank you so much, sir. You have no idea what this means to me." I said, shaking his hand. "You're very welcome." He said. I stood up and walked out of the room.

I felt a weight off my shoulders. I didn't have to deal with school anymore. I was done.
♠ ♠ ♠
BAM! Le wild new story appears. lol.

I got the idea for a new story when I was listening to Guys Like You Make Us Look Bad by blessthefall. So basically when I was reading through the comments, it said that song was about a girl that got molested. I thought, "Oh hey that would make a good story." So after that I went to pick out a new book to read and I saw 'Identical' by Ellen Hopkins and thats where I got the idea about her mom not being around. Then I went on SixBillionSecrets.com and I saw a random secret about a girl that got raped by her dad then he punched her in the stomach, and killed her baby.

And WALAH! New story.

I feel like I might actually finish this one. xD

So tell me if you like it or subscribe. :3