Me and God
The Fall Out
It has been so long since I dedicated myself biblically. I recently became the co-producer of an app called "bible study with me". Its a cool discreet way to learn and study the bible. I've disclaimed my grandparents. Not because they are bad people, but because I slipped up. June 2013 my pastor raped me. I barely fought because I respected him and loved him to much to return the painful favor he had given me. Now almost nine months later I'm still considering not pressing charges even after it was a continuous rape that I turned into an affair. I'm not proud if it but it doesn't sadden me or make me as ashamed as it should. I'm just trying to get back on the right track. Even though your wrong its never too late to get right. I'm currently single and not looking. If I see someone who shows the same traits as my savoir, then will I approach them, but until then.. I will wait for you. I've stopped poetry and since then I've cut occasionally I've cried occasionally. I've made my recent relationships be idolized as my god. I let my parents down, I let myself down, I let my god down and I and feeling the sad sick pain. I'm smiling right now but I know when I go home. I will sleep till the lord calls me. (or at least Ill try.)