When I Think About You

"Holy shit. My phone just died!" I exclaimed in shock as my iPhone shut itself off. I whacked it a few times against my palm and huffed before turning to Zayn who was chuckling.

"Can I borrow your phone? I really need to call mum," I said with a small pout. He nodded and handed me his Blackberry. I kissed his cheek before walking into our room and closing the door behind me. "I'll just charge my phone."

So, I sat there and talked to my mum for a few minutes concerning a possible pediatrician for the baby. And then, curiosity got the better of me and I scrolled through Zayn's messages. The first few messages were harmless, texts from his mum and his sisters; nothing out of the blue. Until I saw this:

From: Sarah
Thanks, babe. ♥

Sarah? Did he have any friends named Sarah? If he did, he never mentioned her. But, what is up with the 'babe' and the heart thing? My face flooded itself with heat and I bit my bottom lip to reign my anger in. He couldn't. Could he? I scrolled to the next text from Sarah.

From: Sarah
Won't she get suspicious?
See you there? ;) ♥

I couldn't hold it in anymore. The tears fell. How could he do this to me? Of all the times that he could cheat it just had to be now. Now when everything was going perfect; when we were getting married with a baby on the way.

"Love?" Zayn asked as he peered into the room. I whirled around and marched towards him before rearing my hand back and slapping him. His hand flew up to his reddening cheek as he looked at me with an incredulous expression on his face.

"Was I not good enough for you?" I whispered heatedly through silent tears. "Tell me, how is she?"

"What are you talking about?" Zayn asked incredulously. I bit my bottom lip in complete anger and shoved his phone into his chest.

"THIS! You fucking prick!" I shouted at him before shoving him and storming over to the front door. I threw it open and wiped my tears angrily as I walked to the elevator. I think a nice walk outside is in order.

"Lil, It's not what you think! I can explain!" Zayn shouted as he ran after me. He grabbed me by my arm and turned me around to face him. I shook his grip off my arm and slapped him again before running off to the elevator, which miraculously opened. I quickly pressed the button to close the doors and tapped it repeatedly, hoping that it would close immediately as Zayn was making his way towards the doors.

As he was about to reach out to stop the doors from closing, it clamped shut. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes as I leaned against the back of the elevator to steady my erratic heartbeat. That was when the tears continued to flow down my face.

Why is it that every time Zayn and I fought, there was no one there to stop us from taking it too far? And why did I always run? Right. Because I was a coward who had lived a very sheltered life and couldn't face the hurtful reality. I was a coward.

Once I got down to the lobby, I wiped my tears and plastered a fake smile on my lips before going out of the hotel's premises and into the harsh world.

***

I didn't know where I was going. I just walked, and walked, and walked. I didn't even know if I was in New Zealand anymore. Well, that's an exaggeration, but you get my point, right?

I was lost.

I eventually reached a park and sat down on a nearby bench so I could cry my eyes out. The sky was slowly getting darker, and the boys had this interview later, so maybe I can never go back home with them. I may have to stay here as an illegal immigrant. Or, I might get raped and killed on this very bench tonight. Well, I've had a good life.

My hands cradled my still baby bump-less tummy and looked down at it before shedding a few tears; letting them soak my green button down shirt.

"I'm really sorry, baby. Your mummy's a coward. And mummy's lost. Mummy ran away from daddy; again. I'm really sorry, Layne.. or Euan." I said quietly through sniffles. If it rains on me tonight, I'm seriously in for a world of high fever. Cold + cough + rain = not good.

*Zayn's P.O.V.*

"What have you done!?" Louis asked me angrily as he shoved me; quite roughly, if I do say so my self.

"Nothing! She just.. she read my messages. And she must have seen Sarah's texts." I said helplessly. From the corner of my eye, I saw Cam tense up. Louis let out an exasperated sigh before placing a hand over his eyes.

"Who's Sarah?" Niall asked suspiciously.

"No one!" I said defensively; putting my hands up in front of me in case Liam, Louis or Harry punched me. Niall was too nice to do that.

"Are you sure that that Sarah girl is no one?" Harry pressed.

"Yes!" I answered surely.

"If she's no one then how come her messages are still in your inbox?" Liam asked skeptically.

"I was too lazy to delete her messages--" Louis cut me off.

"Lil is very sensitive when it comes to cheating in a relationship. My dad cheated on our mum, on me, on her! We may even have a half-sister somewhere out there!" Louis burst out angrily; he was so angry that you could see the vein on his neck popping out. It scared me, to say the least.

"I didn't cheat on her! I never have and never will! I could never even dream of doing that to her. I love her too much to hurt her." I explained.

"Then explain. Who's Sarah?" Cam asked; no, demanded. She demanded me to tell them who Sarah was. And, I explained everything to them.

"We need to find her." Louis stated defiantly.

"But, we have an interview." Harry started to protest.

"My pregnant sister is out there and you expect me to sit in a studio full of people who really don't give a horse's fuck about me, apart from you guys, while she's somewhere out there; cold, and hungry, and sick. Or worse, she might get mugged and raped.. and then murdered." Louis ranted. I nodded quietly; agreeing with him.

"But-" Harry began.

"You don't understand, Harry. None of them were there for me when I broke my wrist; twice. None of them were there for me when my goldfish died. Not one single person there was there when I auditioned for the X Factor. None of them were there when my mum and dad got divorced. You might not understand how I feel about my sister, but, let me tell you.. I feel very scared to lose her. I'm not going to lose my sister."

"That was very touching, but, I was going to say that we don't even know where to start looking for her." Harry finished his earlier sentence.

*Lil's P.O.V.*

"Of all the times that I could have worn something warmer than this." I mumbled; pulling my legs up to my torso and wrapping my arms around them.

Maybe I should try to find my way back to the hotel? No. Louis always told me that if I got lost, I should stay where I am until he finds me.

I buried my face in between my knees and sighed heavily. Why was I born a coward? And an idiot? I wouldn't even be lost if I had just stayed in the room and talked everything out with Zayn. Or, I should have brought even his phone with me so that I could call Louis to pick me up. Or maybe I should have grabbed the money that was on the table by the door when I left. But no, I just had to be hasty and leave without thinking. Maybe I could sell my necklace for some money?

No.This necklace was a gift from Lou when I turned 13. He went all out to save for this; even going as far as skipping lunch to save a few pounds. Selling this necklace is NOT an option.

Great, now I'm talking to my self. And, is that my stomach I hear growling?

"I hope your uncle Lou finds us soon... maybe even your daddy." I mumbled quietly before letting out a deep sigh and closing my eyes; praying to God that someone will find us soon.