I Come Alive

The night terrors never changed. Beau would look to his right, and find nothing but darkness, but when he looked to his left, he found anorexic figures moving in on his vulnerable figure. Some were men, most were women. They all had smiles literally painted upon their faces that told a story within itself. One smile, stitched and ripped apart, told a story of a kidnapped girl. The next would be curved up to their ears, which would say that that particular person had been smiling through sadness for such a long time that their face had gotten stuck that way. Yet Beau was the only person who never smiled in these night terrors.

Then they disappeared when he blinked. Instead of being surrounded by anorexic and tortured figures, he was faced with dictators who all looked strangely familiar to Mr. Rager, yet had small differences that set them off from the actual person. Each of them laughed in the same way, and did torture him in the slowest and most painful way possible.

Beau couldn't make out any other noises from the surroundings except for a faint whimper that grew with time. As whips landed across Beau's back with loud cracks, and the duplicates of Rager laughed, a cry from behind them all is what caught Beau's attention, because that particular cry was Joshua, strewn across the ground with a long gash across his throat while blood spilled over the edge of the slice and puddled beside him. And after Joshua's whimpers subsided into nothing more but a faint loss of breath, Beau could hear the chirping of a bird outside.

"Beau?" Joshua's voice was the first thing that called out to Beau from outside of his nightmare. Joshua hovered over him on his knees, shaking Beau's shoulder with a gentle hand. "Beau, please wake up."

Beau shifted uncomfortably upon the bed, opening one eye to find his beautiful mate upon him, a worried quiver playing upon Joshua's lips. Beau brushed some sweat ridden hair away from his porcelain skin, sighing gently as Joshua's eyebrows knitted together in wonder.

"Oh, are you okay?" Joshua pressed the back of his hand to Beau's forehead. "You wouldn't wake up for a minute, Beau, I was so scared." Glistening tears accentuated Joshua's perfectly imperfect face along with the dim light that spilled from the outside street lamps.

"Don't cry." Beau murmured, wrapping his arms around Joshua's body and crushing him in a hug. "I'm sorry. Y'know I don't mean to scare you that way."

"Is it the same dream?" Joshua squeaked, wiping his eye free of tears with his index finger and sighing against Beau's chest.

"Yeah." Beau said. "Just a bit longer than last time, though. There was a bird this time." Joshua looked up at Beau, urging him to continue. "Well, there was this huge crowd around me, like last time, but after they cleared away all I could see was...." Beau trailed off as he pictured a clear slice along Joshua's throat. He shivered. "All I could see was darkness, and then this bird started singing." He partially lied.

"Oh." Joshua mumbled. He traced shapes along Beau's chest. "Well, we'll be out of this house tomorrow, and the birds won't be there anymore." Joshua tried being hopeful by bringing the tone of his voice up, but Beau was still awfully quiet. "They were actually quite loud today. When Ethylon and I were moving boxes, they just wouldn't stop chirping."

"Did I wake you up?" Beau asked abruptly.

"No." Joshua shook his head quickly. "I actually couldn't sleep anyways. I was... thinking."

"About what?"

"It's just— No, never mind. It's stupid." Joshua said. "We should go back to—"

"Joshua, what's wrong?" Beau tilted his head. "You can tell me."

"I know.... It's just a stupid thing to be worried about. You had this huge nightmare, and I'm just worried about one stupid thing."

"You're worried about something? What is it?" Beau pushed himself off of the bed, gently pulling his shirt away from his chest as it was stuck from the sweats he had at night. Joshua crossed his legs and slouched awkwardly.

"I just.... I'm nervous to go back to school. That's all." Joshua squeaked.

"You wouldn't be the first kid, Joshua." Beau chuckled. He remembered his first day at high school where he got lost while going to every class he had, and then the teachers scolded him for not memorizing the buildings his classes were in. "Are you worried about screwing up?" Joshua nodded quickly.

"And then.... I won't be here to surprise you when you come home." Joshua's face flushed. "I always make you something, or leave some candy, or buy you something for you so when you get home, you're all happy! But now we're gonna get home at, like, the same time." Joshua pouted. "I don't like it."

Beau smiled, slipping out of the bed so he could open the window on the other side of the room. Joshua clicked his tongue.

"And your school is really far from mine! I mean, we can't even walk together, because my stupid high school is like a mile away from yours." Joshua admitted. "So yeah, it's been bothering me a little bit."

"You're so cute, Joshua." Beau giggled.

"No! Really, it just sucks."

"Well, I'm sorry." Beau slid his shirt off over his head with a gentle sigh. The cool air from outside curled around his unnaturally warm flesh and soothed him into a sort of numbness. "I didn't plan for it to be this way."

"I know...." Joshua shrugged. "I'm sure I'll get over it. I guess it's just the shock or something like that. Nostalgia? No, that's not what I'm feeling.... Well, whatever it is, it doesn't feel good."

"We should probably get to bed." Beau crawled into the bed, resting his head upon a pillow. He patted his chest, and Joshua rested his cheek against Beau's warm flesh.

"Hey Beau?"

"Yeah."

"I know you said you're naturally warm and all... but are you sure you're not just sick or something? I mean, your skin is just really warm right now."

"Yes, I'm sure." Beau kissed the top of Joshua's head.

"You're sure you're sure?" Joshua snickered under his breath. Beau rolled his eyes, but nodded.

"Now go to sleep."

As the silence filled the air, and Joshua's breathing steadied while he fell into a deep sleep. Beau heard a faint whistle from outside. Even though it was a wavering sound, he knew that particular song; the bird song. And Beau thought to himself that he couldn't wait to get out of that stupid apartment, away from the birds. The apartment carried memories that even Beau could not think of without growing depressed.



"Joshua, have you seen my medicine?" Beau called. It was early morning, and Beau had overslept. Already the relaxation of the new house was taking toll on Beau, but in a positive way. The silence the house carried was one that Beau had not had since he was young and living with his parents. Even Joshua had to admit that the house was more than he bargained for.

"Check the box labeled 'Beau's medicine.' " Joshua replied from the bed, resting his face against a cool pillow on the bed. "Beau, I don't want to get out of bed."

"I'll drag you out if I have to, Joshua."

"Did you find your medicine?"

"No." Beau snapped. "Seriously, where are my meds?"

"I don't know." Joshua said. Then he jumped out of the bed, searching through unpacked boxes they still had all throughout the halls of the second floor of the house. "Look, they're right here." Joshua ripped the duct tape off of the box and slipped out a bottle of pills. Beau sighed in relief, walking over to Joshua's side and smiling. "And what a shocker, they're in the box labeled 'Beau's medicine.' " Joshua looked grumpily over at Beau who was emerging from the bathroom with a guilty look upon his perfect face.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to get mad."

"It's fine, Beau." Joshua brushed it off. He handed Beau two blue pills, though he kept his gaze averted from the eyes that studied his expression without mercy.

"Hey." Beau said after swallowing the pills down without water. Joshua placed the bottle of pills back into the box, not bothering to glance at Beau. "Hey, Joshua. What's wrong?"

Joshua shook his head quickly, not bothering to look at Beau, though he knew Beau wouldn't take that as an answer. Beau turned Joshua around, his eyebrows knitted together in frustration as his own mate wouldn't even speak to him.

"Please tell me what's wrong."

"Beau." Joshua exclaimed, throwing his arms around Beau's shoulders. "Please don't leave me!" His voice was muffled by Beau's shirt which Joshua had buried his face in. Though his words weren't clear, his faint sobs were. "Beau, I'm so scared."

Beau complied, running his fingers through Joshua's auburn locks of hair. Slowly, Joshua's trembling subsided into nothing more than a few shoulder twitches or knee buckles.

"Joshua, I know it's hard." Beau whispered. "But you've been through things ten times worse than this." Beau's hands pressed against Joshua's shoulders, pushing him out of the embrace. "You've rebelled against he Capital. You've saved lives. Hell, you've taken a bullet to the chest before! If you can do that and not shed a tear, Joshua, then you can go to some high school." Beau used his index finger to wipe stray tears away from Joshua's cheeks. "I don't know why you're so nervous about this."

Joshua laughed at himself. "Me neither."

"If there's any trouble, just call me. I mean, you know my cell number, right?"

"Yeah...."

"So don't fret, pet." Beau smiled. He pressed his lips to Joshua's cheek. "I gotta go now, or I'll be late. Now, John will be in front of the house at 7:50, make sure you're ready by then." Joshua nodded. "Now, you can either walk home after, or John'll pick you up."

"I think I'll walk home." Joshua said.

"Okay then." Beau looked down against at his lovely mate, and yet, this time it was different. He wasn't looking down at Joshua and worrying about his future, or his family, or even the election that was happening in a week (which had somehow taken over a good amount of his thoughts). Instead, Beau looked down and he saw Joshua, the boy he had fallen in love with at first sight. Their eyes locked as they had thousands of times before, but Beau felt a love greater than ever before. He even had butterflies in his stomach,

"You should get going." Joshua mumbled. He gave a weak and unconvincing smile. "I'll see you— mmf!"

Beau locked their lips together in a firm, yet tender kiss, holding Joshua's fingers between his own. He gave a weak laugh into the kiss, but didn't bother to pull away, even in the slightest. Beau always thought kissing Joshua was like... he always thought it was like biting into a ripe fruit. His lips were so tender, delicious, as strange as it would sound. Sometimes Joshua even had a chap stick that made their kisses taste like fruit.

Their lips pulled apart and Joshua's eyes fluttered open while a blush grew on his face. Beau brushed his hair away from his face with a smile. Joshua's face flushed from a light rose color to a bright scarlet, and his glasz eyes exploded in color.

"I know I don't do that enough and mean it." Beau said. "I'll see you later, okay?"

"O-okay." Joshua stuttered, covering his reddened face with his hands. Beau gave a quick laugh before bidding Joshua farewell once more and running down the stairs to the first floor of the house with a small backpack over his shoulder. Joshua, still in slight shock from the amazing kiss. He looked out the window as Beau left their brand new home and started toward the busy city yet again.

"Love you." Joshua said before he looked at the trees which were completely bird-free.



Beau could hardly squeeze himself through crowds of people as adults crowded around televisions to watch the live debate between the candidates in the election. Beau never took to any of them, even President Gile who helped him and Joshua in their time of need. They all seemed crooked in some way, shape or form. Perhaps it was his own paranoia that got the best of him, but others thought they were dirty, so it wasn't just Beau.

Many of the candidates said that Beau, Ethylon and Joshua got off with little to no punishment, and needed to be punished furthermore. Plenty of the harsher candidates said that President Gile should have executed them on the spot, and yet, they claimed Beau and Joshua to be heroes at the same time. It seemed that many people forgot about Ethylon within the mix because he was also a criminal at one point. Their minds were confused whether to praise Ethylon for voicing himself, or scold him for giving the Capital cause to execute thousands of people within District 16.

Of course, there were the nuts within the race. Plenty of conspiracy theorists that said they would fix the Capital if given the chance, when Beau knew they really needed to be put in an institute or something. They had no idea how the world worked.

There was one runner that did capture the attention of men and women alike; Matthew Parish. He was smooth, his opinion was easily voiced, and Beau had to admit that he was attractive, and it was no wonder the women took such a liking to him. He had a way with words, so men voting understood exactly what he was saying. He was liked by many, though that didn't necessarily mean he was going to win.

Beau glanced at the large clock over the town. It was 7:55, Joshua should be on the way to school already. Beau just hoped Joshua would be okay, though he had an idea in his mind that he would just fine, as long as he didn't doubt himself. With all that spunk, Beau thought, how could he ever doubt himself?

"Hey, did you hear? Apparently Parish is leading in the polls!"

"No kiddin'? Well, I knew he was a shoe-in from day one."

"I think his votes went down though. When he said he would take care of those kids from the Capital, the votes sort of plummeted for a while. Those kids are a bunch of geniuses, and if anything happens to them, then shit's gonna get real."

"Whatdya talkin' about?"

Beau rolled his eyes as the conversation between the two men continued while he rushed off to the campus. He was already going to be late to class as it was, he didn't want to get caught up with some argument that would end in the same way; the two men would see him and suddenly agree with everything Beau said. Then as he left, they would treat him like a god. Beau was tired of that though, so he kept himself out of it. He'd rather not let what's past ruin his future.

Beau's cellphone vibrated from his pocket, giving him a slight tingle that trailed down his usually pained leg. The medicine did work better today, better than normal it seemed. After slipping the phone out of his pocket, he found a message from Ethylon.



Beau furrowed his brows together. The last time he saw Rowan was when Joshua was fixed. Since then, Rowan had been so busy with some new project that he hadn't given Beau any time to socialize. He had been a bit of a hermit ever since the whole incident had happened, though it was different than how he used to act. Before he even knew Beau and Joshua, he told them that he was always sort of a shut-in, and never associated himself with the Capital unless it was needed.



Then Beau cursed under his breath as he noticed the time. He'd had to start leaving the new house earlier than expected, and he knew that Joshua would just be so pleased to hear that.