The Party Scene Has Got the Best of Me

ERIN'S POV

"Jasey, please, stop crying. I've fed you, changed you, burped you...seriously, sweetie what's wrong?" It was no good me even asking her. Not only would she not be able to answer, but I already knew.

It was Alex. We both missed him. It was May, Jasey was 10 months old and Alex had been away on a world tour thing since March. They'd extended the tour because Alex hadn't wanted to do warped this year because of Jasey. He said there was no way he was missing a summer with his only daughter. I found it quite sweet, but I knew Jasey would just miss him the longer he was gone. We'd skyped almost all the time, unless I was at work for a few hours. Otherwise we pretty much spoke everyday. If it was early enough Jasey would join me, but I don't think she quite understood why she couldn't have a hug from him.

I sighed and carried Jasey through to the living room. Settling her on the floor, I found the DVD I was looking for. Jasey wasn't even playing with the dogs. She really was upset. I rarely put this DVD on for her, the language was a little...not age appropriate. But desperate times called for desperate measures, and when she saw Alex's face on straight to DVD she immediately perked up. As he began singing she crawled over to the tv, pulled herself up on one of the shelves so she could stand, turned round to me and said "Dadda" before falling back down on her bottom.

I froze for a moment...did she just? Wait..."Sweetie, who's that?" I asked pointing to the screen. 

She looked back at it again, then to me. "Dadda," she stated with more confidence, pointing to the screen.

I ran for the phone. I didn't know what time it was wherever they were, but Alex needed to hear this. I dialled frantically and practically jumped up and down while waiting for him to pick up. 

"Come on Alex, come on!"

"Hello?" he finally answered. Thank the lord!

"ALEX! Oh my god, are you busy? Like right now?"

"No...we're on the bus back, remember? We finished the tour last night." Oh yeah, it was the first of June tomorrow...I'd almost forgotten. "Why? Is something wrong? Are you okay? Is Jasey okay?"

"No, no, no, nothings wrong Alex just...look I'm gonna put you onto Jasey okay? She just said her first word and...well you'll see..."

I went back to Jasey and handed the phone to her, holding it to her ear until she kept it there. After her listening to his voice for a while, she repeated her first word. I was getting all choked up. I never really understood how something that small could be so important, but now I did. I really did. While Alex was on the phone getting her to repeat 'dadda' and probably getting the rest of the bus to hear it, I went to fill the dogs bowls. I fussed over them a little then went back to reclaim the phone. 

"Erin! I can't believe it! I mean...how?" he asked excitedly.

I laughed. "She was crying so I put on Straight To DVD for her, and crawled up to the tv, pointed to you and said 'Dadda', and then I called you."

"I can't believe it. I just...now I really can't wait to get back! We need fucking rockets on this bus."

"She'll still be saying it tomorrow I'm sure. I guess I best go put her to bed now, especially if we're gonna be meeting you off the plane tomorrow. We gotta be up early."

"Yeah I guess...give her a goodnight kiss from me!"

"Will do," I said smiling. He really was attentive.

"I've missed you so much Erin, I can't wait to get back."

"I missed you too. We both have. I love you."

"I love you more...so I guess I'll see you tomorrow," he said with a sigh. Neither of us wanted to hang up really.

"Yeah...see you tomorrow. Night Alex."

"Night, love you!"

"Love you too," I replied, and hung up, smiling. Jasey was still in the loving room, but looked a little happier as she petted Peyton and Sebastian. I let her stay up for another half hour as I continued to watch the DVD. I really did miss him, and watching him on this seemed like I had him back with me. I knew it was a good idea to keep it when Alex told me I didn't need to keep watching it. I opened the little booklet and laughed at the familiar handwriting. Alex had stolen it and wrote a little something in there. Presumably before he left for tour.

"Erin, I know you're gonna be watching this while I'm away, you always do. Don't think I haven't caught you before, mainly towards the beginning when you were more of a fangirl that I, for some reason, had thought was a good idea to bring into my home, into my life. But guess what? Even though you still fangirl all the time and refuse to take down those stupid posters of me (I'm flattered...but it's creepy) and you spend more time on The Hustler Club than any other site, I'm glad I bought you into my home and into my life. I love it when your face lights up when the bands songs play on the radio, more than ours, I love the fact that you wanted all your merchandise signed and that you hate it when I offer you money for something. I love that even after all this time, you're still you at the end of the day. But you really do need to stop worrying about the money stuff. I'm glad we met how we did, because otherwise we wouldn't have Jasey. And even if you got membership to THC and won meet and greets, we may have just passed each other by. I might have just thought what I was feeling was the gratitude for having such an adoring fan. And I wouldn't be happy. I'd be a douchebag. I know the hard times you went through with your family, and I wish I could have known you then to help you through it, even though you say our music kept you holding on and saved you, I wish I could have actually done something more. Because truthfully? You saved me. You saved me from myself. And you know something? After all this time, there are two things you've never told me. They just never seemed important. Firstly, you never told me your last name. Secondly, you never told me your birthday. I know I could just look on THC and find out, but I wanna know from you. See, I have this song I wrote for you, but I don't know when to play it, so we are gonna have to discuss this when I get home. I love you Erin, so much, more than I ever thought capable. I love you. So I thought I'd write this in here, because I knew you'd read it, and I know you miss me, because I sure as hell will miss you! Just hold on, yeah? And move into my room? Because I can't be dealing with the posters of me in yours...like they can stay there, I accept that you're never gonna take them down. Just move into my room, kay? Good. Thank you for loving me, for giving me a chance to be a father, for being My Only One...yeah I did just reference to my own song. I'm allowed to. And you know you love it! I'll see you and miss Jasey Rae on the first of June baby! Oh, and ps, I finished a song for Jasey too, after much contemplation I was able to come up with a title too! You just had to make life difficult with that name, didn't you? Oh well, it's all good."

I smiled as I finished reading. I picked Jasey up and we headed to his...OUR room. I thought it might be nice to let her sleep with me tonight, sometimes she sleeps better like that. As I settled into bed, holding Jasey close to my heart, I suddenly felt calmer. I'd see him tomorrow. I really was in love with him.