Anything but Ordinary

(Aimee's POV)

It was only a couple days since I had moved down and somehow I had gotten roped into helping Bam with filming more for Viva La Bam. Probably didn't help that Heather had volunteer us. “The film crew is going to be here any minute!” Heather yelled nearly causing an echo to start in Bam's house.

Staring at her form across the kitchen island I questioned her sanity with a stare. “We are all right in the same room.”

“Oh.” Acting as though nothing had happened, she ventured to the fridge and grabbed a can of soda.

Jess, who had been sitting on the couch while staring at his phone, begun shaking his head. “I am fighting the urge to send Ape a warning message about that one.”

“No warnings.” His younger brother took the phone and pocketed it. “The production van just pulled in and we are doing mics on the way to the salon. Ape goes on break soon.”

Heather stared at Bam, the can still at her lips. “It's so early in the morning, how could she take a break?”

“It's noon, Clubby.” Jess informed her, before searching his pockets for his phone. Throwing a dirty look at Bam made me want to laugh at them. Least I wasn't the only one dealing with Heather anymore. “Guess I'll be a good son and come along to help calm her down afterward.”

The ride to the salon was long, and more so because of Heather's 'warming up'. The girl was able to scare Ape normally so the need of warming up confused the crap out of me. Pulling into the parking lot, Heather begun fighting Jess for her sword back. “BUT I NEED IT!” she screamed right in his face.

Finally reaching the building, and after getting Heather to stop her unnecessary mic checks, I walked in and looked to the reception’s desk. “Hi, I need an emergency cut.” Walking closer to the girl who seemed straight out of high school, I watched her flip through a book.

“I want April Margera to do it!” The demand alerted the poor girl who's eyes left the page and skeptically.

I had to recover quickly in order for this whole thing to work the way Bam wanted it to. Didn't know why that mattered to me, but it did. “She was highly recommended to us by a friend to well” Lifting up one of Clubby's messed up pirate braids from over a week prior, I notice the girl looked more at ease. She even seemed as if she was fighting the urge to laugh at Heather, which was always a good sign. “to kinda attempt to fix this mess.”

The braid fell back down and Heather stared at me “My hair is beautiful!”

“I'll sneak you guys in right before she goes on break.” The girl walked away to most likely find our victim.

A few awkward seconds passed before the teen came back to the lobby. “Right this way.” a smile made her face glow in a manner that almost made me feel bad for the stuff in my pocketbook. Like I said, almost.

At the very last station, an older woman with short blonde hair was laying out scissors on the counter area. Guess Ape Margera though she could go to lunch like a normal person. “Hi, I'm April.” Motioning Heather to the chair, a mix of horror, disgust, and surprise filled Ape's face. “Oh my, who did this to your hair?”

“The stupid lady at the spa!” Heather said in a loud outburst that stopped the other busy stylist for a few seconds. “I wanted different beading.” The last part stayed under her breath thankfully.

Ape had most of the braids out and was about to get Heather ready for a good shampooing or something. “Can we hurry this along? I have a car to commandeer. It's trunk holds the world's most prized possessions.”

“The stylist fucked up so bad she's been talking like this since last weekend.” Nodding Ape started taking the last braid out and threw away the pile of beads from Heather's hair. “You are doing a public service right now and don't even know it.

“So Amber said someone recommended me for this?” There was no concern which made me feel sad for Ape.

Raking my fingers through my straightened burgundy hair, I took a deep breath. “I forgot the guy's name but he's like about this tall” placing my hand a few inches above my head I saw Ape nod. She still seemed to be without worry. “Blue eyes, dark untamed hair. A heart tattoo on one wrist, shitload of other ones. OH and a Don Vito on his leg.”

The scissors fell to the ground with a metallic cling. “Bam?” She shook her head no as if hoping I would take the hint.

“THAT was his name!” acting as though I really didn't know it, I hit my own head. Heather had already jumped out of the chair and had grabbed a can of silly string from my bag and started covering Ape's station. “I had been trying to think of it this whole time.” Finding a free chair, I sat down and pulled out my cell.

“YOU TRIED TAKING MY PIRATE WAYS FROM ME!” Heather screamed before kicking over a rolling tray of various hair cutting things. “NOW I WRECK THE PLACE!” Glancing back to my cell I noticed Bam had responded saying he would come in but couldn't breathe because of Clubby.

Looking into the hidden camera, I shrugged and sat back as Heather took the can of shaving cream and continued her pirate warpath. “Ape, back up. Clubby gets carried away very easily.”

“Should have known my son had something to do with this.” Not really listening, Ape went to take the shaving cream from Heather and ended up covered in it. “YOU HAVE TO BE KIDDING ME!”

The front door bell went off just before DeVito rushed into the room and started telling Heather to stop. Instead he ended up getting tied to a chair and silly stringed before Heather found toilet paper in the restroom. He became MTV's first ever mummified safety person.