Bad Romance

Willow's P.O.V

I hated being in this room, it's four white walls looking back at me, the plain white bed sheets and monitors beeping all day. The guys must have missed a couple of shows now, I told John and Fraser to go but the simply dismissed it. Said they weren't going to leave me, and neither we're the other bands apparently.

The doctors said that I could go home though this evening, though whether I would be going home or staying on the bus would be another thing. I can't face going home to my parents, what would they think? I'm not even old enough to have a child, all my life I've wanted to do so much, travel the world, start a small business, do more artwork.

I wanted to have a lovely relationship with someone who really cared, I stopped myself. I couldn't think about Gus, about what he did. A small part really does still love him, miss the cuddling, the kisses, smiles, warmth, laughter and even the sex to a degree. But the more I think about all those thoughts, the more It makes me sad, how could he do all of this? Ruin it all for me and the band and probably himself. He clearly didn't care.

As I wiped the tears away from my face I placed a small hand on my stomach. Pregnant, wow. That was a big word when I really thought about it, that there was a child in me, a little me and what was I supposed to do about it? How am I going to tell Gustav? I started to cry harder, they wouldn't stop, I couldn't stop them! This was all such a mess, I want Gus. Of all the people in the world I want him so bad.

Suddenly the door burst open and a woman was pushed into the room, Gus stepped in after her. I stopped crying suddenly, what was she doing here? Why has he brought her here? Of all the people to bring to see me, he brings her! Bastard. The tears welled up again, only they we're for anger this time, not for sadness.

“What the fuck is she doing here?” I spat between sobs towards him. A hand reached up and he ruffled his lovely black hair. His blue eyes puffy and bloodshot. My heart ached even more, I wanted to cuddle him, take him in my arms but how could I? After all he's done, how could I just love him again?

“I came to tell you the truth, please listen” She said calmly whilst looking at her feet. She didn't even sound sarcastic or mean which caught me off guard a little. I tried to calm myself down but the tears still flowed. I nodded ever so lightly to let her know I was listening.

“It wasn't what you think. I came onto Gus and I shouldn't have. He didn't even want to speak to me, I tried flirting with him and everything but he was having none of it. I just threw myself onto him and kissed him, I was drunk but he wasn't. I had no idea he was seeing anyone, but that doesn't excuse what I did. You had every right to swing for me and my god you pack a punch has anyone ever told you? But he honestly didn't do anything, I've split up with James since as he found out, I'm devastated and I cannot begin to understand how you feel. But Gus honestly didn't do anything, he pulled away as soon as it started, which was when you walked past. I'm so sorry” Emily sighed then ran a hand through her hair.

What was I hearing? This was too much to take in, this is a good thing though isn't it? I can go back with Gus! But what do I do about the baby, what do I tell him? I don't even know if I'm ready, too much has happened and I don't know if we can built it back again, it's all such a mess!

Emily leaves the room and Gus closes the door, he goes to sit down on the bed but I look at him. His crystal blue eyes staring into my forest green ones. What do we do? What do I do?

“Willow?” His voice is ever so soft, his large hand placed on my tiny one. Which soon moved to my stomach, I flinched, it was to early for that. The sadness in his eyes shone through which just made me burst into tears. I wanted him to hold me, to comfort me but he didn't and I wanted to know why! We're we not okay now? Could we not go back to last week when everything was fine?

“I-I'm so sorry Gustav” I burst out, giant sobs wrecked out of my body, I tried to hold them in but there was no use, they we're flowing out of me. Without hesitation Gus jumped forward and wrapped his arms around me, embracing me in a warm hug. He smelt of Cigarettes and Givinchy Play, as always.

Placing a hand on my head he stroked my hair, his soothing shushing calming me down to little gasps of tears. What am I going to do? What are we going to do?