Control

Control

Chapter 20: Will They Rise Again?

They say everyone is afraid of death, afraid to leave all they have done in life and exit this world of suffering. I was no exception. I chose to live, but what life was it? Full of blood and death. Leo once said that I was scared of the shadow of death that stalked us all, I laughed at him, back then I wasn't afraid of anything, everything was afraid of me. But I am afraid. Afraid of the man I would become. Everyone is always afraid of the man I become even Sophie.

"Let me go you fucking hound!" I yelled once more trying to gain freedom from this infernal chair. It had been over a week since Annie had defeated the Old Ones and passed on, over a week since I had tasted that bitter sweet liquid. I stopped struggling lapsing back into the 'good' Hal. "God, I'm sorry Tom."

"It's alrigh', but Christ you're like…Jackal an' 'yde." He sighed sitting down on the couch we would sit on to watch the Antiques Road show. The days when it was Tom, Annie, Eve, Sophie and I, when nothing was too complicated, no Old Ones to destroy us, when I was near the edge and about to drain the whole of South Wales dry.

"It is Jekyll and Hyde you absolute imbecile!" I yelled renewing my struggle once more even though I knew it was futile. Tom had been raised to kill vampires; keeping one captive was child's play. He sighed again switching on the television to drown out all my insults. There were soft footsteps on the stairs.

"I heard shouting…Hal…" Sophie whispered as she walked into the room…I couldn't remember whether she'd had blood…blood I wanted it…no I needed it right now, needed to feel it trickle down my throat. Sophie sat down next to me pushing some hair out of my eyes.

"Tom, how long this time?" she asked the question confused me, were they discussing something about me? Or were they discussing how long Alex had been out of the house?

"Not long, he flipped a couple of minutes ago so I'd say it's been 'bout thirty minutes' tops." Tom replied, turning down the volume slightly after Annie had passed, the rules hadn't stayed…well there was no need for the schedule anymore and there was no young child to swear around…and there wasn't a ghost that would yell down the house if you stepped out of line. No more routines, not more control.

"At least he's flipping less frequently now." Sophie commented affectionately smoothing down my hair. "A few more days, couple of weeks at the most, and he should be at least sort of in control."

"Where's Alex?" I asked, neither of them responded. Generally I would flip once Alex was mentioned or in the room, somewhere deep down inside my soul I believed I blamed her for what happened to me, what happened all together. It was her blood I drank, it was she that was caught by Cutler and it was she that made me start to lose it in the beginning with that silly little trip to the museum.

They were ignoring me, Tom had every right to. I was being a complete and utter jerk, if someone insulted me constantly…well they wouldn't have a head, but that was beside the point. It infuriated me; I had never been ignored in over five hundred years. No one ignored Lord Hal!

"Don't ignore me, you fucking Neanderthal!" I hissed my fangs sharpened as my anger took control, my eyes turning black. I wasn't in control anymore. Fifty years down the drain in one gulp of blood, it was all Cutler's doing and now he was gone, the only one that I trusted. My protégé…my friend was gone as quickly as he returned. I never thought we'd see him again, I left him after a couple of years together he was only new to this game…and I left. Sophie had once compared it to abandoning a child, she felt attached to Hettie and we had left her a long time ago…but it was different she was four hundred by now where as Cutler was only eighty.

"Hal, calm down." Sophie whispered facing me towards her rather than to Tom. It was hard to stay angry when her eyes, her deep blue eyes looked so sad and scared.

"Righ', Regus is back in town, I'm going to see 'im and Michaela." Tom stated as he shook his head turning off the TV. He stood up walking over to the bar grabbing his set of keys and his coat. Sophie nodded shifting to go into the kitchen; they were all going to leave me strapped to this infernal chair. "I'll see you later, Alex should be back soon."

"Don't you fucking leave me here!" I shouted my voice cracking from all the yelling I had been doing for the numerous times they tied me to this damn chair. He ignored me once more slamming the door shut as he went. He hadn't given up hope that I could change again, I on the other hand knew it was too late. Sophie knew that the evil side of me was going to re-appear, the Hal that had massacred most of Europe and the new world, that had made her and made Cutler…the side I was most scared of.

"My Lord." Someone whispered, I must have nodded off for a bit, Sophie had returned to my side…something seemed different…I could move once more. I pulled her down onto my lap before kissing her passionately, I tasted blood…when had she drank blood? "Shall we?"