I Got Your Picture I'm Coming With You

JACK'S POV

The set was fucking awesome. The summer heat didn't prevent us from giving it everything we had. The kids were going crazy, and amidst their screams for me, Rian and Alex, I heard a few for Lexie, who may I say, looked hot with a bass in hand. I'd never felt more pumped. There was something about this crowd which just made me want to stay all night. I was surprised at how hot it was here at night. I guess it's because of the season. Alex and I joked around, and Lexie joined in too. There was a light in her eyes, one that hadn't been there this morning. That was what a bunch of enthusiastic fans and a kickass drumbeat  could do to you. And you don't even realise until you're at your lowest point. 

The crowd wanted Lexie and I to prove we were engaged, but really they just wanted a snap to take home and post on the Internet of the latest adorable All Time Low couple. Alex encouraged them too. I didn't have a problem but Lexie looked a bit shy, so I made my way over the stage to her, put my arms around her from behind and licked her cheek. She relaxed and laughed, so I gave her the kiss of her life right there and then. When we came up for air the crowds were wolf whistling and cheering and just generally freaking out. Lexie's cheeks looked flushed. I loved making her like that...you know, embarrassed, it was kinda cute. Alex mentioned something about being jealous so I sauntered over and gave him the kiss if his life too. True jalex moment. Yes, with tongue. The crowd LOVED that. Alex was caught somewhere between shock and wanting to burst into a fit of laughter. Rian didn't mention anything about being jealous. Maybe he didn't want my tongue down his throat. But honestly? Tonight I didn't care. I was playing a show with my fiancé and she may have something she's holding back, but we were going to talk and I just loved her do much. I was happy just to be here with her.

We ended our set and came off stage. Everyone was going out for post show drinks, but Lexie and I stayed behind. It would probably be useful to have the bus to ourselves if we needed to talk. I got her a hot chocolate as she settled down on the couch in her pyjamas. Those looked like really comfortable pyjamas actually. I may steal them. 

"So, what is it you need to tell me?" I asked, handing her the warm mug and putting an arm around her and cuddling her close. She was biting her lip like crazy. "Come on, don't be scared, please. You know I love you. What is so wrong?" I said, soothing her by stroking her hair. She hid her face in my shoulder and I felt her shoulders shake. She was crying. And now I was worried, all memories of the happy time on stage forgotten. Lexie was my focus, and she was sad. I needed to know why.

Eventually she murmured something, but I couldn't understand what she said. "I can't hear you, say it again."

She took in a deep breath and then said, whilst trying not to cry more, "I'm pregnant."

LEXIE'S POV

There. I said it. I was pregnant. I'd had a hunch but I wasn't sure until yesterday. And I hated myself for it. I couldn't be pregnant, I just couldn't. It wasn't right. It wasn't FAIR!

Eventually I looked up to see Jack staring back at me. I was unsure of his reaction. A part of me wanted him to react badly, do what he did to Vienna, so I wouldn't feel as guilty for how I felt about the whole situation. But another part of me did want him to stand by me, to help me through this. I just didn't know anymore. My mind was fucked up. 

After a while his mouth turned into a smile and those worried eyes became gentle and filled with...happiness? He pulled me closer and just held me. I couldn't hold back the tears.

"Why are you crying Lexie? This is a good thing. I love you, you love me, we're getting married and now we'll have a family. Everything is perfect. Why are you so upset?" Jack whispered in a consoling voice.

I sniffled and choked back more tears. "Because I don't want to forget her." He knew who I meant.

"Oh Lexie, you won't. You never will. No one can ever make you forget or replace her. Not even another baby. Jasey was you first child. Memories like that don't just fade. Wouldn't she be happy that you'll be having another baby? She wants you to be happy. You shouldn't punish yourself. I mean, you do want this baby, don't you?"

I nodded my head. I did, but I just felt guilty for wanting it, like the kid would be an insult to Jasey's memory. And this child could grow up happy, whereas Jasey never could grow up. It was so hard. "But what if I love this one more? What if I prefer it? I shouldn't want this baby! It's not fair to Jasey!"

"Please, Lexie, stop. A parent never loves one child more, not really. Jasey would unrest and. You're already showing that you're a good mom, you care so much about Jasey, you'll care so much about this baby too. Only bad parents prioritise and you never will," Jack said in an attempt to comfort me.

"But what if I do?" I moaned. "What if I do prioritise? What if I'm a bad mom? I already proved I'm a bad mom because I wasn't enough to keep her here, someone out there knew I'd be a bad parent," I continued, crying uncontrollably into Jack's shoulder as his arms wound more protectively around me. Protecting me from what? Myself? Most likely. 

"That's ridiculous! Jasey died because of complications, you told me so yourself. There was nothing anyone could do. Not you, not the doctors, nobody! Things like this happen, but you gotta try and remember that there are good things in life too. And this is a good thing. Life is made up of bad and good, and while the good doesn't get rid of the bad, the bad doesn't outweigh the good. I promise you Lexie, you won't be a bad parent. You'll have me. I'll be there every step of the way."

His words were starting to sink in, and I was starting to feel a little better. Jasey really wouldn't want me to be like this, she wouldn't want me to feel guilty for loving another child as much as I love her. And Jack said he would be here.

"But Jack, what about when you go on tour? You can't take a baby and you can't stay behind. What do we do then?"

Jack thought about it for a moment. Then he spoke. "My parents can help you out. They won't mind if you stay with them for a little while. Or you and Vienna can move in together. Then you can both help each other. That sound good."

I thought about it and smiled a little. "Yeah." It did sound good, knowing someone would be there if I needed them. 

Jack pulled back and smiled. "So, we're gonna have a baby?"

I giggled as Jack wiped away some stray tears left over. "Yeah, I guess we are."

"HELL YEAH!" he yelled, pulled me off the couch and spun me around, causing me to burst into a fit of laughter. As he was spinning me and yelling, the door opened and Alex, Rian, Matt and Jeff stumbled in. I don't know where the rest of the crew were. Hopefully they hadn't lost them, maybe they were on the other bus. I don't know. I would be worried but I honestly didn't really care right now. 

"Dude, what are you shouting about?" Alex yelled back at him, causing Jack to finally set me on my feet.

Jack looked down at me. "Can I? PLEASE? Can I, can I, can I?" he asked jumping up and down. Fucking hell he really was excitable. 

I giggled and nodded.

"LEXIE'S HAVING MY BARAKITTEN! Imma be a dad again!!!" he screamed in delight.

The guys were shocked for a moment but soon rushed forward to pile on top of him, tackling him to he ground. I stood there laughing, and I felt pretty great.