Bones We Can Fix

As I woke up the next day, I forgot about my ankle and rolled over to check the time on my Blackberry.

‘Ow,’ I groaned, as pain shot through my ankle. ‘12 o’clock?’ I said to myself. I couldn’t believe how long I had been asleep. I stood up and made my way to the main living area to find Josh was the only one there. He was wearing his black sleeveless DBNO denim jacket and reading a magazine which he quickly put down as I entered.

‘Morning,’ I smiled.

‘Morning,’ he said, returning my smile.

‘Everyone else out?’ I asked.

‘The girls are sitting in the back, the rest of the guys are doing press,’ he told me.

‘Why aren’t you with them?’

‘Feeling kinda rough,’ he shrugged. ‘Resting myself for the show.’

‘As rough as me?’ I asked, with as much of a smile as I could muster.

‘God, yeah,’ said Josh, clearly having forgotten about my ankle as I had. ‘Why are you still standing there? Sit down,’ he commanded.

‘I need food and tablets...’ I started, not really sure what I was saying.

‘Sit,’ Josh repeated. ‘I don’t know whether Dan told you or just us, but as long as you are here, on this bus, it is our job to look after you. I will get your tablets and some breakfast for you, and if anyone so much as touches you, we’ll kill them.’

I smiled to myself at Josh’s passionate speech as I sat myself on the sofa. ‘Thank you,’ I said quietly.

Josh simply nodded and turned to the mini kitchen on the bus, pulled my tablets from one of the cupboards and prepared me some food. All of this passed in silence. In all honesty I still felt bad for snapping at him, even though he seemed to be ok now. It wasn’t until I had taken my tablet until I spoke again.

‘Thank you,’ I said again. ‘I don’t know if Dan spoke to you...’

‘Yeah, I didn’t know if you knew or not,’ he replied.

‘Yeah,’ I said. ‘He mentioned it at dinner.’

‘He said you felt bad, but you really don’t need to...’

‘But I’m not like that, I didn’t want to offend you,’ I cut him off.

‘You didn’t,’ he said and then there was a slight pause. ‘I was just a bit taken aback. I was only trying to help.’

‘And that’s why I felt bad. You were being nice and I yelled at you for no apparent reason...’ I trailed off. I had never had a more awkward conversation in my life and as the rest of the guys tumbled back onto the bus I breathed a sigh of relief.

‘You only just woken up, sleepy?’ asked Dan as he sat beside me.

‘Yeah,’ I said smiling as I began to eat my breakfast.

‘And Josh has been looking after you?’

‘Of course he has,’ I said looking up at him as he smiled, before standing and following Max and Matt out to the back.

Not long after I had finished my meal I fell asleep on the sofa, I swear those pain killers made me really tired. Dan and Chris, who had been in the lounge with me, covered me over with a blanket and headed out to one of the many bars on the site, Max soon realising and following them out. A few minutes later, Josh walked through to the kitchen just as my Blackberry vibrated. He picked it up, wanting to check it was nothing important and saw a message from Vee.

'I don’t know what to do about Max...'

Curious, Josh opened it. He had seen how close she and Max were growing and, being best mates with Max, decided to talk to him about it, coming to the conclusion he had feelings for her.

The rest of the text read:

'He seems so lovely and I’ve been spending so much time around him and believe it or not he can be really sensible and sweet when he wants!! But what if I say something and make a fool of myself? He’s probably just being nice coz I’m a fan. Arrrrrggghh! I don’t know what to do! xx'

After reading the mini essay Vee had sent me, Josh, without thinking, replied.

'You’ve just gotta be honest with him xx'

The minute he hit send, a wave of guilt washed over him. But he knew he was doing what was right by Vee and Max. They clearly liked each other and he knew Max, and there was no way he would have the guts to say anything. Around cute girls, the hyperness became a mask, just a bravado to make them like him.

Josh then placed my phone back on the sofa beside me and continued to make himself some lunch and I began to stir.

‘Sorry,’ he said noticing. ‘Did I wake you?’

‘Not at all,’ I said smiling and sitting up.

At that point Vee came skipping through the bus.

‘You seen Max?’ she asked Josh.

‘Nope, I think he’s gone to the bar with the guys though,’ Josh told her as she continued on her way out.

I shook my head as Josh took as seat in front of me with his food.

‘What?’ he asked me.

‘Vee and Max,’ I replied. ‘I always used to wind her up saying she’d be perfect for him because they are so similar, and now she seems more obsessed with him than ever.’

‘You know, Max has been talking about her too,’

‘Coz she’s a nutter?’ I asked sceptically.

‘No, I think he likes her,’ Josh told me and I raised my eyebrows. Highly doubting what he was telling me.

‘I’m gonna ask her what she’s up to,’ I said grabbing my Blackberry.

As I went to open my texts Josh looked like he was about to speak but changed his mind as I looked back down at my phone. I noticed the text I had apparently sent to Vee. I opened the message thread to read her text.

I then looked back up at Josh, at first I was confused, and then I saw the guilt on his face.

‘You answered for me?’ I asked, no emotion decipherable in my voice.

‘I wasn’t thinking,’ he said.

‘Too right you weren’t!’ I said, raising my tone. As much as I wanted to stay calm I knew how this would end.

‘I was just trying to do what’s best for my mate,’ he offered as an explanation.

‘By replying to my friend? What if it doesn’t work out? Who’s gonna get the blame then?’ I knew I needed to stop talking as Josh tried to speak, but I couldn’t. ‘What the fuck were you even doing with my Blackberry? I mean, how long have you known me and you think you can just...’

‘I’ve said I didn’t think, alright?’ Josh snapped. ‘I would say I’m sorry, but I doubt that would make any difference to you and your fucking temper!’

I sat, silently gobsmacked at his outburst.

‘I don’t care if you are injured, or a fan, or how much of a shit Dan gives about you but I’m sick of you and your temper. If you can’t control it, don’t talk to me.’ And with that, he stormed from the bus.

I continued to sit in silence as Jessica emerged from the back of the bus. Shit. I’d forgotten her and Matt were still here.

‘What were all the raised voices for?’ she asked.

‘Nothing,’ I replied.

If I didn’t have a broken ankle I would have run from the bus. I had no idea where, but somewhere to get away from things. Had I just yelled at Josh Franceschi? The cute blue eyed singer from You Me At Six? I couldn’t be trusted with people anymore. I kinda wished Dan was around. I could pour my heart out to him, or scream at him, or just sit there and cry, and I knew he wouldn’t judge, he’d just make me feel better.

‘Me and Matt are watching Rocky Horror...’ started Jessica.

‘I just wanna be alone,’ I said, quietly.

‘Ok then, you know where we are if you need anything,’ she replied and left me to my thoughts.

It wasn’t until much later that evening that I saw Vee or Josh again.

Josh returned to the bus first, talking to Chris and pretending I didn’t exist while I was sat leaning on Dan. It was then that Vee and Max appeared, holding hands.

Me and Josh looked up simultaneously. I didn’t look for long and rested my head back on Dan’s shoulder.

‘You alright, mate?’ asked Max as Josh continued to glare at him.

‘Yeah, I just hope you’re fucking happy,’ said Josh, cynically.

Great. Josh hated me and was taking it out on Max.

‘What do you mean, man?’ asked Max, slightly confused.

‘Vee came and found you earlier, you had a chat about your feelings and now you’re holding hands. I hope you two are happy about it,’ said Josh, his emotion now discernable. ‘Ignore me. I’ve been hanging out with stroppy there and it’s rubbed off on me,’ he added shooting me a dirty look.

‘Josh, back off of her...’ started Dan.

‘No,’ said Josh simply. ‘I’m not having her taking over our lives just coz she’s a fan who broke her ankle. But now that those two are all lovey-dovey, I doubt we’ll be able to get rid of her any time soon!’

‘What’s got into you?’ asked Dan. ‘You’re not like this.’

Josh bit his lip to stop himself from retorting and turned to the bunk area.

I didn’t know what to do with myself. I knew I couldn’t stay here but at the same time I was in another country, one I didn’t know, there was nowhere else I could go. I felt Dan about to stand up.

‘Don’t,’ I just about managed to say. In that one syllable I felt my voice break.

Dan stayed where he was and wrapped his arm around me and instead Max headed after Josh.