Chapter 33 : Rain

Their conversation made my heart stop. I didn't know what to feel. Anger? Jealousy? Happy? Between those three emotions though, one stood out. Anger.
I stared at her in disbelief. She had kept yet another secret from me. Sure, it was bound to happen. But why not tell your own best friend about it? I thought we were done with secrets? I thought we were done with the lies? Whether I should believe anything that ever comes out of her mouth again, happened to be a mystery. Because truth is, I don't know if I could.

No, I don't want to be mad at my best friend for the rest of my short-lived life. But I'm not going to be happy that she has lied to me for so long over not just one thing, but a few. I say a few because who else knows what she has lied about? A secret identity? She's really a man? She's absolutely head over heels with Justin Bieber? What? This is getting out of hand.

I slowly got up, Patrick trying to grab my hand. He knew I was pissed. If it was possible, I probably would have steam coming out of my ears and my head would pop off.

"Anything else you would like to share, Baylin? " She looked at me and then down at the floor and started to walk towards her room. Guilt was written all over her face. I didn't feel pity. I was nice to her about the whole being pregnant thing. But something like love? For someone like Tayden? And hiding it from her so called best friend? Was she ever even going to tell me? I stepped in front of her, blocking her way. " Is that it? You're just going to ignore me?" I wasn't going to cry. Not here, and definately not now. "How long have you been keeping this a secret, huh? Any other secrets you'd like to tell me? I'm your 'best friend' after all, aren't I?"

Baylin started to tear up, "I know you're angry. I know I should have told you and I'm sorry. But you're already dealing with so much..." Patrick got up from the couch and apparently took this as his hint to leave. "No, you stay. Because right now, I don't think I'm going to be able to stay here tonight. Not when I have someone lying to my face everyday. Patrick nodded his head and went to my bedroom and shut the door. No, he's not whipped. He just knows how much Baylin and Tayden mean to me. Having them lie to my face and not being able to talk to me about anything hurts.

She stayed silent, tears streaming down her flawless face."I really am sorry, Rain. I'm so very sorry for keeping things from you. I just didn't know how you'd react."

"How I would react? How about this, I would have reacted a whole hell-of-a lot better if you would have told me the truth from the beginning. But thanks, thanks for hiding more shit from me." I crossed my arms over my chest. Tayden walked out of his room. He must have heard me screaming. He looked concerned, shocked, a little heart broken, and guilty as well. Everyone is guilty anymore.

"Rain, calm down. We just didn't want to tell you because of everything you already have on your plate. Baylin didn't know how I felt about her either. So don't yell at her! "

"On my plate? What? Are you siding with her now? Enough on my plate, hah! I could eat a fucking buffet if I wasn't so damn sick. This is probably one of the worst days ever! This is one of the reasons that I didn't want you to know about the cancer, Baylin. You treat me like I'm handicapped. You both do. For your information, I'm not, okay? I'm perfectly capable of handling shit." My heart was racing, my hands were shaking, I just wanted to run right now. But I knew my body wouldn't let me. Tayden was about to blow. His hand was on Baylin's hip and his other hand waving at me while he talked. Of course he'd take her side. She's not the one dying. She's still going to be around. She's having his baby.

Tears started to threaten to spill out of my eyes. "Rain, you're blowing this all out of fucking proportion!" Baylin left the room and slammed her door shut. All that was left was Tayden screaming at me and me screaming at Tayden. " I'm blowing it out of proportion?! You two lied to me! Again! How many more times to I have to be lied to in order to find out the truth, Tayden? It's not fucking fair. " He was about to cut me off. "Don't you fucking dare cut me off when I'm trying to talk now."

He was shocked. I don't think Tayden has seen me this mad before. Not at him, not at Baylin, not at anyone. I wasn't even this mean to Baylin's grandmother.

"I'm not little anymore, Tayden. I'm grown up. I can't stress how many times I have to tell you." As I said this I started to walk towards my room where Patrick waited. "I'm not going to be around forever, you know. Once I'm gone, maybe you'll realize you should have said things to me before I died. Or maybe you won't realize it at all. Because maybe you don't even care anymore. Your precious Baylin and baby are more important now, I get it. I'm not going to find out what's going to happen once I'm dead. I'll be dead. There's no coming back. There's no more telling me lies. Nothing, dead. And to be honest, right now, that doesn't sound like such a bad thing..."

I opened my door and locked it before Tayden had a chance to say anything else. Patrick was sitting on my bed, looking up at me with one of the saddest faces I have even seen. Did he feel bad for me? I didn't want him to. Or was he just upset about the entire situation. I wiped my eyes, and faked my best smile. He reached out his hand and grabbed mine. This nice gesture made my tears stream down my face like there was no tomorrow.

"I'll never lie to you, Rain. I will never treat you any different than I'm treating you right now." He kissed my ear and I wrapped my arms around his neck and cried into his shoulder. "Thank you, Pat."


I was staying at Patrick's for a night or two. He said I could as long as I wanted, but I knew I'd have to go back home sooner or later. I'm hoping it'd be later though, way, way later.

When I woke up this morning, Patrick was already gone. On his pillow was a note that said, "Come down to the kitchen. I'm making a shitty ass breakfast, but you're going to eat it anyway because I said so and because I made it with love." At the end of the note there was a winky face and a 'P'.

A smile crept its way to my face. He was oh so good with his words. What a romantic.

I went to the kitchen and Patrick was wearing nothing but shorts and an apron. I laughed, " And I was hoping you'd be naked." Patrick looked down at his apron that said, "Kiss The Cook." He pointed the spatula at me and at his apron.

"What? I'm not going to do what an apron says to do." He kept pointing the spatula at me and then at the apron without saying a word. "Okay, okay, fine." I grabbed his apron and pushed his body against mine.

His smile was the high light of my day. I loved his smile, his laugh, even the little dimples he'd get when he'd smile really wide. He didn't like them, but I thought they were the cutest things ever.

Pat lifted me up and set me on the counter.I wrapped my legs around him and pulled his waist closer. He set the spatula on the counter without moving his lips from mine. We were getting really into it until we smelled burning food.

Apparently, Patrick forgot that he left a pancake on the skillet before he started kissing me. "Oh, shit!" I didn't want him to stop kissing me, but I didn't want him to burn the place down either. The pancake was black on one side and perfectly light brown on the other side.

"You can eat that one." I slapped his arm, "Yeah, right. You can eat that one. You're the one who did it."

"No, no! We'll give it to Copper. We'll save it for him." I shook my head and laughed. "It's chocolate. Dogs can't have chocolate."

He shrugged his shoulders and threw the pancake away then poured more batter into the skillet. I grabbed his apron again and kissed him, fully aware that there was a pancake being cooked. I could kiss him for hours. Kissing him was like kissing him for the first time all over again. The butterflies would always flutter in my stomach, a smile would always form on his lips or mine. It was pure happiness in one simple kiss.

"Okay, I am going to have to refrain from kissing you again. Otherwise, I will get carried away and burn this pancake. Then we might not end up eating breakfast at all. "

I gave him my best pout, "And why not?" He flipped the pancake, put the spatula down, and stood between my legs again since I was still sitting on the counter. "Because if I keep kissing you, I might not be able to stop." He whispered those words in my ear as his hands rubbed my thighs, "Then you wouldn't get any breakfast because you'd be busy doing other things." He kissed my neck and down to my collar bone.

Hell, if he was talking about what I think he was talking about, I could totally skip breakfast. Patrick lived with his buddy from college. They were renting a house. His buddy was away on a trip with his girlfriend of four years. Pat said he was going to propose to her and he might have to get his own apartment.

His hand traveled further up my thigh and tugged lightly at my panties. To be quite honet, I was already getting a little excited. Especially when his kisses trailed up from my collar bone to my lips again.

Like I said, I could skip breakfast. My thought seemed to fade away as he pulled away from me and grabbed the spatula again. He had the biggest smirk on his face. "You're joking, right?"

He shrugged and put the pancake on the plate. "You need to eat. I'm hungry, and you're not the only thing I'm hungry for. He kissed me on the lips once more and poured more batter on the pan.

That little tease!


I haven't been home for two days and I still didn't want to go home. I had texts from Baylin and Tayden, even voicemails, asking me to come back home and how much they missed me and how sorry they were. I didn't feel bad for leaving, I was still angry. But I've been having a really amazing time with Patrick these last couple days. We went to the movies, the beach, I met his parents. Which was a bit awkward, but not as awkward as I thought it would be. Apparently, Pat talks about me all the time and is really close with his family. They didn't treat me differently, they didn't treat me like I was suffering from cancer. They treated me like family.

I never replied to any of their messages, Tayden and Baylin's, I just ignored them. I wanted them to know how angry I was.
Patrick's family accepted me. Yeah, I knew they were sad. At one point, his dad asked him if he loved me. He blushed, as did I. I grabbed his hand, we were actually about to leave their house when he asked this. His mom noticed this little gestured and smiled, but soon frowned. I knew what she was thinking.

Patrick was attached, and so was I. But they knew that Patrick wouldn't be able to stay with me forever. His mom knew that Patrick was going to hurt, and probably hurt bad after I left. I'm going to be selfish though, I don't want Patrick to leave me just because of the cancer. I want him to stay-stay with me until the end.


Patrick took me home. Baylin wasn't there and neither was Tayden. They probably were both at work. Baylin's babyshower was tomorrow. She probably didn't think I was going to come to it. Her presents were still in my closet, wrapped up in pink baby wrapping paper. I ended up getting her a bath set, diapers, and baby wipes. Everyone is going to need those.

I kissed him good-bye and lied on my bed for what seemed like forever. But soon enough, sleep caught up with me and before I knew it, I was dreaming. Dreaming of a better place, a better world. A world without cancer and lies...