Like The Brightest Star, You Shine Through

The so-called “date” I had with Max went surprisingly well. I somewhat expected her to be quiet the whole time, and never talk to me as long as she lived. But she warmed up to me slowly, and we had some really good conversations. The next day at school wasn’t awkward at all. It was like we’d been friends for months at that moment. It was good. Really good. But, unfortunately, my challenge to get between her legs wasn’t completed. I have a feeling it will be soon, though.

It’s been a few weeks since that date, and we’ve went out a few more times. Earlier in first period, she accepted my invitation for yet another date, but an official one, other than the other ones which we’ve just thought of as ‘hanging out’. So tonight, my plan is to take her back to my place, and see what’s hiding beneath those skinny jeans and baggy t-shirts.

All I can think about as I make my way across the school is what I’m going to do tonight to possibly convince her to ‘open up to me’, so to speak. Words to say, sweet gestures...whatever it’ll take to get her lying down on my bed and ready for me. As I walk out the front doors, my face wrinkles in reaction to my most recent thought; I wonder if she’s a virgin. I wouldn’t be surprised if she was, considering how shy and conservative she is. But I wouldn’t be surprised if she wasn’t, what with her beauty and all that.

I shake my head to myself at the word ‘beautiful’ having a place in my thoughts as I step aside on the steps to wait for Max. She’s usually the first one here, but I guess she’s running a bit late today. The word I described her with... It’s not like me to call someone that. They’re either cute, hot, or fucking sexy. No one I’ve ever wanted to sleep with is beautiful. At least, not in the way I’d describe them.

Sighing softly, I mentally ask myself what the hell is happening to me, and why Max is the one to be doing this to me. It’s not even the fact my mind just called her beautiful, it’s...everything. I act differently around her than I have with other girls. I actually treat her nicely, as opposed to just some disposable, replaceable fuck. But then again, that’s probably because it’s actually taking real interaction with her to get her to sleep with me, instead of “Hey, you wanna fuck?” like it did with all the other girls.

I chew on my lip and cross my arms over my chest as I lean against the railing attached to the steps, staring (probably awkwardly and creepily) at the door as students practically run from the prison that is high school. Among the faces, none I see are Max. I can’t even look for a friend of hers, because, well...she doesn’t even have any. I guess I’m her only friend, and I sure as hell can’t ask myself where she is if I don’t, well, <i>know</i> where she is.

Half sighing and half groaning, I drop my arms from my chest and reach my right hand around me to pull my iPhone out of my pocket. I quickly unlock it and go to my contacts, scrolling through them like my life depended on it and immediately tapping on the Call button beside Max’s name when I get to it. Humming softly to myself impatiently, I hold the phone up to the side of my face and listen to it ring in my ear.

It’s been seven minutes since the dismissal bell rang, and I’m always out here after three minutes. Max is always here waiting for me. I wonder what could be taking him so long, or what he’s doing, as I continue to listen to the annoying ringing in my ear. It suddenly ends and redirects to her voicemail, causing my eyebrows to knit together in confusion and worry.

I rake my fingers through my hair with my left hand as I use the other to slide my phone back into my back pocket, looking around the school yard in hopes that Max is just talking to someone else, although everyone knows just how impossible that is. I stare at the door for a few minutes until I notice no students are walking out anymore and I frown to myself, a quiet sigh escaping past my lips.

Shaking my head and allowing my hair to fall in my face, I hang my head and watch my feet as I step down the stairs. I chew on my bottom lip and swallow thickly, making my way towards the student parking lot to get to my Escalade. A small hope arises in my mind that maybe Max planned this, and was waiting for me by my car. I immediately raise my head to look over at it, only for my frown to reappear when I see nothing but the black vehicle and no one around it.

I shake my head more and roll my eyes at how foolish I could be, especially in this situation. But I’m not used to this. No one has ever stood me up before. Why now? Why did it have to be Max to stand me up, and why did she do it this time and not every other time? I slowly come to realize it was probably the fact that I asked her out on a date this time, as opposed to asking her to hang out. She probably just didn’t want to say no because she was worried about hurting my feelings. Whatever.

A feeling of anger fills my body as I open my car door and I drop my backpack off my back, throwing it inside the vehicle and watching it land on the passenger seat where Max was supposed to be sitting. I narrow my eyes at the thought and jump into the driver’s seat, slamming the door shut beside me and immediately jabbing the key in the ignition, starting the car and listening to the engine purr softly.

I turn the radio on before I pull out of my parking spot, the local metal station already playing in the background. I turn up the volume and reverse out of my spot before quickly speeding out of the parking lot and not bothering to even look before pulling onto the street. I realize that could get me in a lot of shit, but I really don’t care right now. All I care about is finding Max and asking her why the fuck she just pulled the shit that she did.

Grinding my teeth together and keeping my eyes staring out the windshield and at the road, I hurry towards Max’s house. She showed me where she lived maybe the third time we hung out. We went up to her room and I watched and looked around awkwardly while she did some of her homework because apparently she’s on a strict schedule at home. Get home by four, finish your homework by six and be downstairs for dinner by then, help clean up, shower, do whatever you want until eleven, and then lights out.

At my place, I never had a schedule or bed time, or anything of the sort. I was always able to do whatever I want, whenever I want. It’s cool at times, but other times, I kind of wish my parents cared enough to give me a curfew or actually enforce rules. But then again, I like all the random shit they get me is pretty great.

It only takes a few minutes to get to Max’s place, as she only lives down the street from the school. Pulling into her empty driveway, I hope her parents aren’t there to make it any more awkward than it has to be. My attention is brought to the window when the curtain quickly closes, and I narrow my eyes. She must really not want to talk to me today.