Words Unspoken

~Aria~

I stood at my locker, rummaging through my bag for my wallet. Discovering it at the very bottom, nearly squished beneath my books, I hesitantly picked it up and took out a five dollar bill for lunch. I bit my lip and frowned. After it had been nearly two whole minutes I had stood there and stared at it, I quickly put the money back and grabbed my bottle of water instead.

“This should do,” I thought to myself wearily. I closed my locker slowly, still pondering whether or not to buy lunch today. “What if I can’t eat it? Then what?”

Suddenly, I felt someone’s elbow jab hard into my side, and I let out a loud, startled shriek.

“Watch where you’re going!” I heard someone hiss from behind me.

Turning around, I saw an olive-skinned girl with eyes and hair the colour of coffee in front of me. She had her lips pursed and her nose wrinkled, as if disgusted, and her eyes sparked with hatred as she glared at me. For some reason, I felt intimidated, and even slightly inferior.

“Uh...sorry,” I said quietly, avoiding eye contact. “I really wish Danica was here right now, she’d know what to say,” I thought inwardly, nearly mumbling the words aloud.

She simply sneered and continued to stare at me, her hands placed on her hips. Before I could ask if she wanted something, she spoke again. “So, where’s your lunch?” The question was casual, but the way she said it made it seem like an insult.

I stared at my hands, wondering how to answer that question. Finally, I took a deep breath and looked up at her. “That’s none of your business,” I said, my voice wavering slightly as I got confused over whether to be rude or simply stern.

“Excuse me?” I thought I could feel her anger radiating off her in hot waves. I gulped, regretting saying what I had said. She took a step towards me, and brought her face closer to mine. “You’re the biggest frikkin’ loser in this school. You better watch what you say, especially what you say to me.”

With that, Alyssa snarled and walked away, her heels clicking against the floor with every step. When she left, I saw Declan staring at me, expressionless, from a few meters away. Had he seen everything?

I smiled to myself as he began to walk towards Alyssa. ”Aww! He’s going to defend me!”

“Alyssa, don’t worry. She can be bitchy sometimes,” was what I heard him say as he caught up with her. My jaw dropped, and I stood there just staring after him. I’d thought we were at least friends. Apparently not. I felt my eyes begin to water as I tried to take in what had just happened. Had he seriously just said that?

A numb feeling engulfed me, and suddenly all I could feel was hurt. No anger, nothing. I bit my lip hard and breathed in deeply, trying to prevent myself from crying. Slowly, I turned my head to look at my locker, which was still half open.

Opening it fully, I took a deep breath before reaching into my bag for my wallet and pulled out the five dollar bill once again, this time keeping it in my pocket. Closing my locker, I tried to sneak one last glance at Declan and Alyssa, but I soon realized they had already gone.

“Screw him,” I told myself quietly as I closed my eyes and held back tears. Taking a deep breath, I opened my eyes, and saw Danica grin and wave at me before heading in my direction. Pulling myself together, I flashed her my best fake smile and waited for her to catch up to me.

“Hey,” I greeted as she approached, hoping I sounded cheery.

“Sup?” she responded, still smiling. She looked at me, and I immediately looked away. Suddenly, her smile vanished, and she frowned at me. “Aria, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong, Dani. What’re you talking about?” I replied, my voice sounding strained. I hated how she could always tell when I was upset.
“Mhm, yeah, sure, and my mom’s a potato. Spill it, Ari,” she said, with a certain firmness in her tone. She raised an eyebrow at me and waited until I confessed.

“Okay, okay!” I lowered my voice before I continued, “Well, um…Alyssa just spazzed at me, and I saw Declan watching. You know what he did? He…He…”

‘What’d he do?” Danica asked, the usual spunkiness in her eyes not there. Instead, she looked as serious as I’d ever seen her.

“He told her that it was okay, I could be bitchy at times,” I finally blurted. I bit my lip and frowned, my eyes watering once more.

“Oh my god, he didn’t.” Danica’s hands were clamped into tight fists, and judging by the tone of her voice, it seemed like she was struggling to keep calm. “So I guess he’s just another one of those guys who chase after the popular girls. I swear I’ll beat the crap out of him next time I see him.”

“No, Dani, don’t. Honestly, I’ll be fine,” I said, taking a deep breath. “Besides, I don’t want him finding out that I told you this.”

“Okay, I won’t be aggressive, but I’m still talking to him about it,” Danica compromised finally, after spending a few minutes thinking. “Let’s go grab lunch. You buying?”

That seemed fair enough. Besides, I knew Danica would never let this go without confronting him, so I nodded, before quietly walking down the halls with her to the cafeteria. I felt butterflies in my stomach at the thought of eating lunch today. I hoped nothing would go wrong.
When we got there, I heard someone calling out my name repeatedly, and turned around to see Jezebel hurrying towards me.

“Aria! Aria!” she said excitedly when she’d caught up to me, panting slightly. “I’ve come up with the perfect plan to get you and Dec together! Listen, we all know Jamel flirts around, particularly with you, right? Well, how about you flirt back, so that Declan sees and gets jealous? Hmm?” Jezebel grinned, showing off her perfect teeth.

I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t want to hurt Jamel, even though he could be a real prick-in-the-arse sometimes. “Jez…I don’t think Jamel would like that,” I said finally, frowning.

“Oh, Aria, don’t worry! He’d never find out, and besides, he’s the biggest player ever. I don’t think he’d be offended if a girl flirted with him then left, considering he does it all the time. I mean, it’s not like he actually likes you!” Jezebel replied, an eager look in her eyes. For some reason, her last comment hurt me inside, and I almost felt angry at her. But I pushed the thought aside.

“I..I guess you’re right. But”—

“You do want Declan to notice you, right?” she interrupted, raising an eyebrow at me.

I looked over at Danica, who’d remained silent the whole time. I knew she and Jamel used to be friends, and I didn’t want to do this if Danica didn’t want to either.

“Dani’s okay with it!” Jezebel said, before Danica could actually say anything. “She told me herself. So don’t worry, kay?” After seeing the look on my face, she continued in a much softer tone, “Aria, I’m only doing this because I want you to be happy. I know you and Declan are practically meant for each other, and I’m just trying to make it happen between you two. So, you in?”

I sighed, before giving up and nodding. I was so overwhelmed right now, what with all the different emotions going through my head, and I just wanted Jez to stop talking.
“Great!” she squealed giddily, before waving good bye and walking off.

“Are you really okay with it?” I asked Danica once Jezebel was out of ear-shot.

“Yeah. We’re not really close anymore, anyways,” she replied indifferently, but I caught the hint of doubt in her voice. For some reason, perhaps it was a selfish one, I didn’t press her about it and let it go.

As we waited in line to buy lunch, I anxiously gripped my money, and felt my palms begin to get sweaty. I looked over at Danica standing behind me, and my worry ebbed away slowly. I knew she had my back if anything happened.

Suddenly, I felt her tap my shoulder. “Aria! I have some unfinished business to attend to, if you don’t mind? I’ll be back in a sec.” Before I could even turn around, she was gone, pushing past the people behind her to get out of line. Where was she going, and to do what?

I frowned, my anxiety once again returning now that Danica had left. She didn’t know about my situation and it wasn’t her fault, I knew that, but still I couldn’t help but feel slightly angered at her sudden disappearance. She hadn’t even asked if I wanted to come!

Somewhat fueled by my anger, I managed to get through buying lunch, coming out of line with a small bowl of pasta and an apple. Danica still hadn’t returned, though, so I ended up sitting at a table alone, feeling small and vulnerable.

I picked up my fork and used it to play with my mac and cheese, eagerly anticipating Danica’s return. To make matters worse, I turned around and saw Jamel ditch his usual spot and head towards me. I started praying he would turn back.

Catching me staring at him, my expression probably a mixture of loath and fear, he smirked and winked at me. He must’ve sensed my repulse, because now his smirk grew larger. Humor danced in his eyes as he sat down across from me, all the while keeping his gaze fixated on me.

“Would you like something?” I said, trying to hide the bitterness in my voice as I struggled to stop myself from spitting out the words. I realized that if I was going to use him for operation jealousy, I might as well try to be kind to him.

But my attempt to be friendly seemed to have no effect on him. “Just your company, babe,” he replied, winking again. I felt a sudden urge to yank out all his eyelashes one by one, but I restrained myself. “So, why haven’t you eaten yet?”

My whole body stiffened. “What’s it to you?” I said, a hint of annoyance, despite all my efforts, notable in my tone.

Jamel seemed to ignore the question, and I inwardly sighed in relief. Just to make sure, though, I ate a few hesitant spoonfuls of my lunch. But that didn’t last long, because the stupid faggot in front of me decided to randomly grab my apple and sink his shark-like teeth into it. So much for the healthy part of my meal.

He took another bite, purposely making it look like he was making out with my poor apple, and my eyes widened in horror. Seeing this, he laughed. “Turned on yet?”

His question caused a sudden bolt of anger to surge through me, and I thought I could literally feel my blood begin to boil. Maybe it wasn’t only his fault. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that Danica had ditched me. I didn’t know. But before I could control myself, I stood up and slapped him hard across the face.

The people near us were staring at me now. Some of the guys were even hooting. This irritated me even further, and, abandoning my half-eaten pasta and raped apple, I stormed out of the room.