The Shortest Distance

how little I really knew her.
We'd talk so much
and say so little.
Oh, I knew quite a bit-
her smoking, her drinking, her bipolar
but what I didn't know-
how bad her depression really was, the secret boyfriend, and the bulimia-
killed her,
and are slowly killing me.
Why the fuck didn't she tell me?
I would've helped her,
would've done ANYTHING to save her,
given up my life
if it would've helped.
Catieboo,
where are you?
why the fuck did you do it?