Keep Me From This World

1.

“Three hours ago Ben left to get cigarettes from down the street. Three hours! It doesn’t take three fucking hours to get a pack of cigarettes from down the fucking street!” I yelled walking back and forth and pulling at my hair.
“Danny, calm the fuck down,” Sam said calmly from the couch. “You know he could have seen someone he knows or a fan, or a group of fans, and got talking. There are reasonable explanations to why Ben isn’t back yet. Calm down and think about them.”
“Sam I know that Ben likes to talk but he said he would be right back!”
“And how many times have you said that same thing and ended up at some whore’s house?”
I stopped in front of Sam. “That isn’t the same, I didn’t have Ben then.”
Sam patted the seat next to him so I sat down and put my head in my hands. Sam put his hand on my back and began talking softly. “Ben is fine. He went to get cigarettes, got talking, and is now on his way back here. He’ll be here and in your lap again before you know it, okay?”
I nodded, wiping some stray tears from my cheeks. “What if Ben is hurt when he comes back to my lap?” I asked not wanting to say that I could be holding a dead Ben in my lap the next time I saw him.
“Don’t say that. The next time you see Ben he’ll be as happy as ever, you’ll see.”
I got the feeling as Sam had said that he had had to reassure himself too, we didn’t know what could have happened to my baby in the last three hours and we wouldn’t until he got back.
Alright Danny, I thought trying to calm myself down, let’s think of the good things that could have happened to Ben. He could have just got talking like Sam said, he could have seen a record store even though I knew from checking that there wasn’t one in the area, he could have decided to get a drink and found a bar, or he could have met a group of fans. See Danny, I thought to myself, there are things that could have happened that don’t mean he was hurt.
Hearing a soft knock at the door I was taken out of my thoughts.
“Did James and Cameron go somewhere?” I asked Sam.
He shrugged. “They could have but I was sort of trying to get you calmed down, remember?”
“Okay,” I said walking over to the door. “It could be a fan too.”
Opening the door I looked out to see no-one standing there, just when I was going to close the door I heard the soft moans of pain and looked down.
“Oh my God! Ben!” I screamed and quickly bent down to pick my boyfriend up.
The first thing I noticed was Ben was covered in blood. His ripped blue jeans, shirt, jacket, even his hair was covered in what I believed to be Ben’s blood. His normally ripped at the knees jeans could now be turned into shorts with a small tug. His shirt hung from his small torso in rags, showing off more of his bruised skin than I needed to see at the moment. And his face, well I didn’t even want to go there; there was blood dripping from his nose, his right eye was swollen nearly shut, and there was something dried on his cheek that I didn’t want identified. I hoped that it was spit but knew better.
“D-Danny?” I just barely heard Ben whisper.
“Yeah baby, it’s me.”
With the most strength Ben could muster he wrapped his arms around my neck and started bawling.
I gently picked him up bridal style trying not to hurt him. From all the skin I could see I knew he had bruises that hadn’t been there earlier so just the smallest of touches could hurt him more than I ever wanted him hurt.
As soon as I walked to where Sam was sitting on the couch he shot up.
“What happened?”
“I don’t know, I haven’t asked.” I said and sat down on the couch with Ben cradled in my lap. At least he isn’t dead, I reminded myself as I thought of Sam and I’s conversation.
“Ben?” I whispered softly.
I felt him nod his head against my shoulder and took it as a signal to continue. “What happened to you baby?”
Too early, I thought as he began to sob even harder.
“Okay baby. It’s okay, it’s okay. You don’t need to tell me anything now, how about Sam and I get you cleaned up and then you and I can go lay down in our bunk, how about that?”
“Just you!” he screamed almost shooting out of my lap with wide eyes.
“Okay sweetie, just me.”
As carefully as I could I slipped Ben out of my lap and laid him down on the couch.
“What happened to him?” Sam asked me as we walked into the bunkroom to get Ben some clean clothes.
I grabbed a pair of sweats and a t-shirt and headed into the bathroom to get Band-Aids and washcloths before answering. “I think he was raped.”
Sam’s eyes instantly widened. “What makes you think that?”
“The dry substance on his cheek is all the proof I need.”
“Oh,” Sam said awkwardly. “Should I call the others?”
“Yeah, tell them that but tell them if they come back not to bother Ben. It’s going to be a long night.”
“Danny?” I heard Ben call weakly and quickly grabbed the stuff I needed and ran.
Breathless already, I asked, “What do you need baby?”
“Y-you.”
“Oh sweetheart.” I said putting the stuff down on the floor next to the couch and crouching down to hug him.
“I was r-“ Ben started as he sobbed into my shoulder again.
“Shh shh shh. Baby I know, you don’t need to say it. I can tell it hurts.”
“Y-you’re not m-mad at me?”
I let go of Ben and looked at him confused. “Ben why would I be mad at you for what some sick bastard did?”
“Because I, because he, because I’m tainted!”
“Baby!” I said not really knowing what else to say. “You didn’t want to get raped, you didn’t walk out of the bus with a sign on your chest saying pick me, pick me. Ben you didn’t do anything.”
“You’re sure?” he said with a sniff.
“Positive, now let’s get you cleaned up.”
Ben nodded and started to get up off the couch.
“Wait a second, do you want to sit here and I can go back and forth or do you want to go into the bathroom?”
“Bathroom, definitely bathroom.”
Watching Ben get up off the couch tore my heart to pieces. Just the smallest movements made him stop, grimace, and breathe heavy. If I ever find that bastard who did this I will gladly turn myself in for what I want to do to him.
“Alright, strip and sit down.” I said not even thinking about what I was asking Ben to do.
With a wet washcloth in hand I turned around to see Ben still standing there fully clothed and wide-eyed.
“Ben I didn’t mean it that way!” I said my own eyes wide.
“I know, can you just turn around?” he asked with a deep breath.
Doing what he asked, I turned back to the sink to get the washcloth warm again. At this point I really wasn’t sure if I was really ready to see his injuries. I wanted to help him so bad but having to hurt him in the process was going to probably kill me. Why did he have to be the one that sick son of a bitch picked to hurt? He was so fucking happy and if I’ve learned anything from all of those crime shows I would place all my money on that he wasn’t going to be that happy ever again.
After a few minutes of waiting Ben told me I could turn around. Truthfully I was utterly terrified to turn around but I did.
“Ben do you have any blood or cuts higher up on your legs?” I asked after seeing he still had his boxers on.
Ben shrugged.
“Are you going to clean those yourself?”
Again he just shrugged.
“Okay,” I said with a sigh. “Just sit down and I’ll clean you up, okay?”
For the next hour we were pretty much silent. The only sounds really made were the water on the washcloth when I cleaned it and Ben’s hisses of pain. At one point I heard Cameron and James come back but they didn’t come into the bathroom. Guaranteed they were worried about Ben but by Ben’s look of terror I knew it would be better if they just saw him in the morning.
“Alright baby, you’re all clean.” I said after helping him clean his hair in the sink.
Ben just nodded as he took the clothes I had got and put them on.
“Thanks.” He whispered looking down at the floor.
Hooking my fingers under his chin I made him look at me. “I love you.” I told him.
“I love you too.”
“Let’s go to our bunk.” I said and picked him up before he could say anything. Sadly he didn’t giggle like he always did when I picked him up.
When I got to our bunk and laid Ben down I was worried that he wouldn’t be able to fall asleep so it definitely came as a surprise wen as soon as I had got in next to him and he had curled up into my side he was fast asleep. I could only wish to fall asleep like that, after what happened I wasn’t sure when I would get a good night’s sleep. What happened, Ben’s condition, and how the band was going to keep going were things that were keeping my mind going now and would probably keep doing so for a while. Would the bastard who did this ever get what he deserved? How was this going to affect Ben? Was he going to be broken forever? Would it get better after getting worse first? Would the band be able to keep going? If Ben wanted to leave the band I knew I wouldn’t be able to leave him alone, I would never leave his side, so that mean the end of Asking Alexandria.
With these questions and more zooming through my mind, I looked down at Ben and realized that those questions might be important but there was only really one super important question; would Ben ever smile again?