The Capitol's Tribute

Brant and I sat alone in the waiting room. It was a quiet rectangular area that was cold and empty. All that was in there were the soft, leather bench and the lone light on the ceiling. It gave off a dim shine, keeping us mostly in the dark. And it felt like we were in the dark from everything. The room was sound proof and we had been sitting in it for nearly three hours, waiting to be called out into our training session.

We had to go in alone, one by one. This meant that Brant and I, being from District 12, were dead last. And that wasn’t good for us. It was getting late and the Gamemakers were sure to be tired and hungry. I didn’t see how they could possibly complain about having to sit and watch us do our best to impress them while they were waited upon graciously by Avoxes with the finest Capitol food. That thought was enough to make anyone scream but I had to keep my cool for Brant.

We hadn’t spoken much since Peacekeepers had led us to this dreary room. We were both too nervous to speak. All Haymitch said to us before we were unceremoniously kicked out of the apartment was, “Play to your strengths.”

I didn’t have any strengths so that wasn’t helpful in the slightest. He basically just threw me under the bus, to make a fool of myself in front of the Gamemakers. But, maybe this was a good thing. If Brant got a better score, he could get more sponsors. A good score from me could have been a big asset but Haymitch thought this was best. And I didn’t want to be scolded again.

Brant cleared his throat and it echoed around the silent room. “Sorry,” He muttered.

I sent him a small smile. “Got any idea what you’re going to do out there?”

My brother snorted, shaking his blonde locks, “Not a clue. It’s the most unhelpful Haymitch has ever been, don’t you think?”

“I wouldn’t say that he’s ever been particularly forthcoming.” I grumbled. Brant grabbed my hand, squeezing it.

“You’ll do fine, Rix.” He told me, “I know you will.”

I ignored him, “You should throw some weights, show off your strength. Use any weapons you feel comfortable with. Weapons get the best scores. You’ve been working with the knives a lot. Do some throwing. As long as you act like you hit the intended target, they’ll never know the difference.” I rambled, hoping to give him the guidance that Haymitch hadn’t.

He let out a shaky laugh and pulled me in for a hug, “Of course I already had that all planned out. I was just testing you to see if you’d be any help.”

“Whatever helps you sleep at night.” I grinned, ruffling his hair.

Brant opened his mouth but was cut off by a loud ding.

“Rixa Hart,” A cool woman’s voice echoed. The doors adjacent to our bench slid open mechanically and waited for me to enter my session.

I zipped up my training shirt and stood up. Glancing over at Brant, I could tell he was nervous for me. I’d be fine. I could always run. I slowly made my way to the doorway. Before I exited the room, Brant called me back.

“Rix,” He smiled, “Use the bow like Gale taught you. If you act like you hit the intended target, they’ll never know.”

I nodded and stepped outside the room. The metal door slid shut behind me and Brant was gone from view. I stepped quietly through the long hall way, following the stream of lights that led the way. When I got close enough, another door pushed open and I was back in the familiar training center.

Up in their box, the Gamemakers were talking amongst themselves, laughing exuberantly and speaking loudly. The moment I walked into their range of vision, the room silenced. Eagerly they waited at the edge of their seats for me to blow their minds or do something amazing. But all I did was quickly walk up to the box and state my name. “Rixa Hart.” I cleared my throat. “District Twelve.”

They nodded, grinning mischievously.

“You may proceed, Miss Hart.” Plutarch’s voice called. It was strange for him to approach me in such a way since the last time I saw him, he was dancing with me and slipping me secrets about these very Games.

I walked up to the metal board that held the bow and arrow. I picked up the bulky bow and slung it carefully over my shoulder. I grabbed a few arrows and made my way to the dummy. Slowly, I raised it up, matching up the notch with the bull’s eye.

I shakily pulled back the string, letting Gale’s voice flow through my mind. “Just take a deep breath, Rix. Let the world fly away, only you and the bow. You’ll hit your target every time.”

I released the bow after a deep breath. I watched it fly and hit the dummy in the shoulder. I took my own advice and acted like I had meant to hit it. I sent a few more lousy arrows at the dummy, hitting everything but the bull’s eye. I hoped they would take this as me shooting the victim with as many arrows as possible in some sick torturous way. They liked that sort of thing, right? Torture? Bloodshed? Yes, this would have to do.

But, I knew my lousy shots wouldn’t be enough so I panicked. I took Haymitch’s stupid advice and did what I did best: I ran.

I ran around the room, shooting arrows, looking like a lunatic. I sped around corners and even lit a fire and tied a knot. But it was all rushed and ridiculous. When Plutarch excused me five minutes later, I was shocked they had let me go on that long. I couldn’t bring myself to look at the Gamemakers, to see their laughing faces telling me that I had no hope of saving my brother when I couldn’t even be useful without tributes chasing after me in a high pressure situation.

I walked as casually as I could out the door before sprinting to the elevator. I pressed the button that led me to the person I needed the most at this moment. My breath caught in my throat and I found myself hyperventilating. Lifting my hand, I held myself up against the wall, trying not to faint.

When the door opened, I almost fell out. I sniffed, trying to catch my breath as I walked into the apartment.

“Rixa?” A gravely voice asked confused. Reid stood up from the table, his thin brows furrowed. “What are you doing here?”

Narina’s soft voice questioned me, “Oh, my! Are you okay?”

“Where’s Finnick?” I demanded feeling hot tears spring down my face. They looked at me bewildered. “What?” I shouted, “What are you looking at me for? Are you seeing the true face of your ally? The hopeless girl who can’t shoot a lousy arrow or—or save her own brother? I can’t save Brant! I’m useless!” I clenched the table, my small frame racking with sobs.

Strong arms wrapped around me and carried me back into the elevator. I was being kicked out. I didn’t blame them. They probably were unsettled by me revealing my weakness. Who wants to ally with a liability?

Oh, right. Me.

I felt the elevator go up but the arms never let go. Instead, they brushed through my hair until the ding came. When the doors opened, it didn’t reveal my apartment and worried mentors; it was the open air of the Capitol.

A clean paved rooftop was where we stepped out. Finnick carried me across the roof until we arrived at a designated spot. He crouched down and set me down in his arms, peeling away the stray hair attached to my wet face. I was rocked quietly in his arms until I calmed down enough to tell him what happened.

When I could finally breathe again, I stood up and made my way to the ledge and sat down, listening to the buzz of the Capitol, excited for the impending Games. I heard him come up behind me, waiting for me to speak.

“Do you ever wish you hadn’t won?” I croaked, staring out at the colorful Capitol people. I could almost see the stats board from way over at the president’s mansion.

Finnick took a deep breath and sat down next to me, not responding.

I wiped my face of any remaining tears, getting rid of the evidence of my weakness. I had broken my promise to myself. And, two career tributes, who were supposed to be our allies, would surely run back to the career pack and be warmly accepted with this little incident.

“I messed up, Finn.” I told me, unable to look him in the eyes. “I ruined everything.”

“Oh, Rix,” Finnick sighed, wrapping his arms around me, “You didn’t ruin anything. These scores don’t matter much. Only high scores count. Nobody pays attention to the low ones.”

“But, they will,” I whispered, “Because I’m the Capitol’s tribute. So cocky, so sure. And, I made a fool of myself in front of the Gamemakers, in front of your careers.” I let out a shaky breath, trying to calm myself down.

“You didn’t cry in front of the Gamemakers, did you?” He asked a bit horrified.

I bit my lip, shaking my head. He released a sigh of relief.

“I still have some dignity.” I grumbled. Finnick sent me a smile to make me feel better. I rolled my eyes, heaving a sorrowful sigh. “I ran around the arena shooting arrows, missing targets. It was atrocious.”

Finnick puckered out his lips, shaking his sandy hair, “Only you, Rixa Hart, would manage to do something so…ridiculous.”

I snorted, “Is ridiculous another word for absurd, or embarrassing?”

“No, I meant what I said.”

When I didn’t respond, Finnick spoke up hesitantly. “I think we should talk about tomorrow.”

“You’re probably right.” I said shortly.

Finnick pursed his lips, waiting for me to go on. He sighed exasperatedly at my stubborn expression. “Come on, Rix,” He grinned cockily, “How bad can it be to be in love with me?”

“I don’t know,” I snorted, “I’ll have to ask Annie.”

He glanced around the city mournfully. He missed her, I knew that. But, there was something else in his face. Finnick shut his sea green eyes and when he opened them at me, it clicked.

It was guilt.

“She doesn’t know.” I realized. “Annie. She doesn’t know about tomorrow.”

Finnick frowned, running a hand through his nicely cut hair. “I haven’t had time. I couldn’t call her, we’re always being watched!” He tried to reason when I stood up, backing away from Finnick, utterly horrified. “There’s nothing I can do, Rix. I know what you’re thinking and it’s not like that!”

“But, it is Finnick!” I felt my skin crawling, “It’s just what Peeta and Katniss did to me. I will not do that to Annie!” I seethed, unraveling again. I was unstable, he knew that. After all that I had been through, how could anyone keep expecting things from me? What happened last year was what destroyed the little life I had left in me and I would never let what I went through happen to someone, especially not poor Annie Cresta. She was even more unstable than I was!

“Rix, it’s not like that!” Finnick tried.

I shook my head fiercely, “No!” I screamed.

Finnick crushed me in his arms, rocking me back and forth again, shushing me. “I know how you’re feeling, Rix.”

“No,” I moaned, “You’ve never given yourself to someone completely and have it ripped away and dangled in front of your face daily, knowing you could never be enough or have them again. You have no idea what that’s like.”

He gripped me tighter, “Annie will know. She knows I love her, that you’re practically my sister! She knows, Rix.”

“She knows,” I murmured back. He was right. What they had was stronger than anything else in the world. They were survivors, they were older and madly in love. If anyone could make it, it was Annie and Finnick. Something as trivial as lies in an interview could keep them apart. They had both been through them, they told their lies. Annie would see the lie that Finnick and I were putting on.

“She’d want me to do it, to save you.” He whispered. “Annie knows.”

Annie knew that this would save Brant; keep me alive as long as possible.

“Who knows,” Finnick let go of me, staring at me with teary, hopeful eyes, “Maybe she’ll be in one of her episodes and won’t even see the interview.”

“She’ll be watching. She knows you’re there, it’s the only way she can be with you when you’re gone.” I was speaking from experience. That was what I had done with Peeta. I watched because I wanted to know he was okay, to be with him again, and to take him away with me. But, instead, I got heartbreak. I only prayed Annie would be well enough to know this was all a ploy.

“Haymitch will kill us if you don’t. Especially if you messed up tonight as bad as you say.” He told me solemnly.

“I thought you said the scores didn’t matter.”

“They don’t. But, I need to do something before you leave.” He said quietly.

“Why?” I breathed, hugging myself. “You’ve already been my friend. You took Jay’s place. You’ve helped me through everything you could. You don’t owe me anything!”

Finnick leaned himself against the marble ledge, letting the light breeze roll through his disheveled hair. “You asked me if I ever wished I hadn’t won.”

I nodded but he couldn’t see.

“Every day until I let myself fall in love with Annie. Then, it was only periodically when I felt like I was endangering her. I can’t ever really be with her, not with Snow in power. The more I was kept locked away in the Capitol, the more the feeling came back.” He told me in a strong voice, keeping his eyes locked on Snow’s mansion. “So, on one of my worst days, I barely got away from a pack of malicious suitors and ran into a nervous young girl. So innocent, so happy. After all you’d been through, you could still be happy and it put my life into prospective.

“So, I took you under my wing, thinking I could help you navigate the Capitol safely. Keep you sane, be your friend. But, in reality, you were the one who kept me grounded. You saved my life.” he chuckled, tears streaming silently down him face, “I can’t let you go without a fight.”

“You’ve done all you can do, Finn.” I told him, leaning lightly against his toned arm, “But, I’ll always love you. We saved each other.”

Finnick sniffed, “Let me do the interview, to thank you for everything you’ve done for me.”

“Being in love with me for the cameras is how you thank me?” I retorted, removing myself from him to the ledge.

“No,” Finnick shook his head, “But it will save you.”

“Well,” I sighed, standing up, “I’ve already agreed to do it so you’re going to have to thank me some other way.” I smirked lightly. “In secrets.”

“I’ll add your name to the long list of my clients.” Finnick joked, standing up as well. “We should get you back. They’re probably all worried sick about you.”

I groaned, “I don’t want to face them. I don’t want to tell them.”

Finnick grabbed my hand, walking with me along the roof, “You don’t have to tell them anything. Just say you did your best and we’ll see what happens tomorrow when they announce the scores.”

I nodded as we entered the elevator. I pressed 12 and then 4.

“Brant won’t be mad. You know he won’t care.” Finnick consoled, squeezing my hand as the elevator went down one floor.

“Thank you,” I told him sincerely, letting go of his hand, “I’ll see you tomorrow night.”

He peered at me, unconvinced, “You promise?”

I smiled lightly, “When have I ever lied to you?”

He rolled his eyes, “We need to make it real. It won’t be like Katniss and Peeta. He loved her, she was oblivious. We’re supposed to be in love.” The playfulness was gone, a pained look replaced it. “We’re going to have to be…intimate.”

Something in the bottom of my stomach squirmed. “We have to kiss.” I stated.

“It’s just as weird for me as for you.” He told me, “But, we can act, right?”

I scrunched up my face, “Out of every girl in the Capitol, you have to pretend love the one who’s practically your sister.”

“This is gross.” Finnick laughed.

“I promise not to vomit on your expensive suit.” He continued to laugh, pulling me in for a hug as the doors opened.

“Thanks, Rix. I appreciate that.” He said, releasing me. I leaned up and kissed him on the cheek.

Finnick glanced sideways at something in the apartment, “You missed.” I gave him a perplexed look.

Finnick leaned in, pressed his warm lips against mine. I heard something shattered to the floor. I jumped back and saw Katniss sitting at the table, glancing between the elevator and Peeta who had dropped his plate and was gawking at us. I slammed on the close button and locked us back in the elevator.

“What was that for?” I hissed.

“Practice.” Finnick told me innocently, “You can’t freak out like this tomorrow.”

“I know.” I mumbled bashfully. “It’s just, no ones—I haven’t kissed anyone since Peeta—” I gulped.

Finnick shook his head, “You deserve better. You deserve more then waiting on a guy who will never be good enough for you.”

I looked away, feeling ashamed, “Maybe I’m still hoping that one day he’ll wake up and realize how stupid he was.”

“He’ll only be able to do that if you win.”

I bit my tongue and opened the elevator door. Peeta and Katniss were gone. An Avox was cleaning up the mess.

“I didn’t vomit.” I told Finnick smartly as I exited the elevator.

“We’ll see how you do with cameras, half the Capitol in the audience, and the world watching from their television sets.” Finnick snorted, leaning back against the wall. I suddenly thought of Gale. He would be watching it, how would he feel about all this?

“I’ll manage.” I told him, letting a smile fall from my lips, “I’ve been told I’m strong.”

“The strongest woman I know.” Finnick grinned before the doors shut.

“Well, sweetheart,” Haymitch chuckled behind me, “I didn’t think you had it in you.”