Shattered By Broken Dreams

“So tell me again why I have to go to this goddamned party?”, Savannah moaned to Erica, as her friend and band-mate fossicked in Savannah’s walk in wardrobe. Erica poked her head back into the room and rolled her eyes at Savannah.
“Because the record company is throwing it, we’re expected to be there, and it’s for the tour kick off.” Savannah thew her hands up in frustration.
“I don’t want to fucking go”, she wailed. “I’d much rather just stay here and watch a movie or something.”
“You can’t hide from him forever”, Erica stated bluntly as she walked back into the room with an armful of Savannah’s clothes. She laid them down on the bed, then sat down. She grabbed Savannah’s arm and pulled her down until she sat beside her on the bed. Savannah’s brown eyes were wide with shock, and Erica grabbed her chin and forced Savannah to look at her.
“It has been ten years”, Erica sighed. “With the band getting back together, we all knew that we may run into him again, and if he sees you looking like a frightened rabbit he’s going to know that he won and that you’ve never gotten over him.”
“I am over him!”, Savannah snapped. “I got over him a long time ago. I just don’t want to go dredging up the past”, she sighed. She didn’t really expect Erica to understand, but she had spent a long time healing her soul after Zacky had abandoned her, and despite how strong and resilient she had become in the past ten years a small part of her was still scared at how she would react when she saw Zacky again.
“You don’t even need to be anywhere near him”, Erica stated. “Both us and the rest of the Avenged boys will keep an eye out for you. Jimmy’s already dubbed himself your Knifemaster Extraordinaire. If Zacky gets out of line, they’ll take care of it.”
“I’d still much rather be staying home watching a movie or working on songs”, Savannah said, hopefully glanced at Erica.
“Ain’t gonna happen”, Erica responded, then stood up from the bed. “I need to get ready. Go and have a shower and for god’s sake put something on out of that pile”, she added, pointing to the pile of clothes on the bed.

Savannah knew that she wasn’t going to get out of going to the party, and whilst she was dreading seeing Zacky, another part of her was looking forward to seeing the Avenged boys. Out of them, she was closest to Jimmy and he had been her confidant and best friend for a long time now. They had always been close, but the accident had drawn them closer and she knew that she couldn’t thank him enough for everything that he had done for her. At first, she had thought that he was helping her out of pity because of what had happened with Zacky, but as she got to know him better she had realized that that was just how Jimmy was. He didn’t have a mean bone in his body, and his first instinct was always to help any of friends whenever they needed it. It was exactly what she had needed at the time, and she would be forever grateful to him. With a sigh, and knowing that Erica would most likely have her head if she didn’t make a start on getting ready she pawed through the clothing on the bed and selected a red plaid mini skirt with ruffled tulle underlay, a red and black spaghetti strap top which laced up on the left and right, black stay up fishnet tights and black lace up ankle boots.

Savannah was just lacing up the boots, and fastening the two buckles that ran around the top when Erica walked back into the bedroom wrapped in a towel, and drying her long black hair. She whistled upon seeing Savannah and stopped in her tracks.
“Damn, you went from not wanting to go to dressing like a siren. You’re gonna give the guys heart attacks.” Savannah rolled her eyes at her friend as she stood up and began rummaging in her jewellery box before selecting two bracelets and a black and diamante ring.
“I don’t know about heart attacks there Rici”, she laughed, “but I am looking forward to seeing Jimmy.”

Once Erica had finished dressing, and both girls had styled their hair and applied their make-up the honking of a car horn reached their ears. Both girls glanced at each other and rolled their eyes.
“Damn Tommy and his impatience”, Erica sighed as the girls grabbed their bags and skipped down the stairs. They were just about to open the front door when the car horn sounded again.
“Alright, keep your fucking panties on”, Erica yelled as she threw open the door, and both girls stepped outside. Kyle was leaning against the front fender of Tommy’s Trans Am giggling hysterically, whilst Tommy shot them the finger from the driver’s side window.

The foursome were halfway to the venue where the party was being held when Erica turned to look at Savannah from she sat beside her in the backseat.
“OK, there’s something else that I need to tell you”, she admitted. Savannah immediately felt a frisson of anxiety run along her spine.
“What?”, she bit out tightly.
“It’s not that bad”, Kyle added, turning around from the passenger side and looking at Savannah. “We just have to play two songs, so do the Avenged boys.”
“OK, I guess I can live with that”, Savannah conceded with a sigh. “So what’s the catch?”
“We voted and we’re playing two of the new songs. Um, we’re playing Vendetta, and….”, Erica’s voice trailed off.
“And what else?”, Savannah asked. Kyle glared at Erica for a moment before responding to Savannah’s question.
“We’re also playing Imperfect”. At that, Savannah’s eyes widened in shock and her mouth fell open.
“No, no, no, no”, she exclaimed, her eyes wide as she stared at Erica. She had written the song barely 6 months after her accident, and whilst she was undergoing her rehabilitation. It had been a way for her to heal, and whilst the band had put her words to music, she had never meant for the song to be played anywhere. It was too personal for her.
“It’s a damn good song, Vannah”, Tommy said, adding his two cents to the conversation. “We voted and we’re playing it”, Erica advised Savannah formally.

The rest of the ride was spent in silence and shortly the band arrived at the hotel where Warner Bros had hired out one of the reception rooms.
“We’re actually playing as the opening for the party”, Tommy advised Savannah as the foursome walked inside. “You won’t need to see Zacky before we play.” Savannah nodded dumbly, still in shock that the three of them had gone behind her back and chosen her most personal song to play before the assembled music executives, reporters and the boys from Avenged Sevenfold.

Barely thirty minutes later, Savannah was standing with Erica in the wings clutching her bass tight against her. She had thought herself over the debilitating stage fright which had dogged her early concerts with the band, however she could now feel the butterflies taking flight in her stomach. Raising her head high, she mentally composed herself and felt herself slipping into her stage persona. Her stage persona exuded confidence and sexiness and was almost like she had undergone a metamorphosis whilst she was standing side stage. It had been a coping mechanism previously, however she had found herself doing it subconsciously whenever she found herself in uncomfortable situations and to many people who did not know her before her accident she came across as cold and aloof.

The emcee for the event called them onstage, and she strutted onstage, vaguely aware of the catcalls and awed whispers at her appearance. They immediately launched into Vendetta and the assembled throng began to cheer. Savannah and Erica strutted around the stage as they played, as Tommy sang the lyrics. Before long the song had finished, and Tommy spoke into the microphone.
“Hey, thanks everyone for coming out tonight. As you know, we’re Crimson Sins. That was Vendetta, and now for our next song we’re going to slow it down a bit. This is Imperfect.”

Savannah began strumming her acoustic guitar whilst Erica held her electric guitar in the background, waiting for the solo that came in during the song. Tommy glanced at Savannah, almost as if in apology, before he began to sing the lyrics that Savannah had written so long ago.

Some things are better off forgotten
We bury them in places that we really only visit by ourself
Oh and you were a version like no other
Oh they never tell you what to do when all you see is gone
What's the sense in anything when what they say is wrong?

Oh what do you want to hear?
Do you wanna know how many times
I tore myself apart 'cos you're not here?
Oh why do you want to know?
Does it make you feel alive?
I had to die to finally let you go

Stop me... I find myself believing
Oh a story gets rewritten so blasphemy's permitted once again
Oh and you were so perfectly imperfect
Oh they never tell you what to do when all you have are lies
What's the sense in anything? It's just one more goodbye

Oh what do you want to hear?
Do you wanna know how many times
I tore myself apart 'cos you're not here?
Oh why do you want to know?
Does it make you feel alive?
I had to die to finally let you go
Oh yeah

Oh what do you want to hear?
Do you wanna know how many times
I tore myself apart 'cos you're not here?
Oh why do you want to know?
Does it make you feel alive?
I had to die to finally let you go

Oh, whoa-oh...
Finally let you go...

As Savannah played the last note, she looked up at the crowd of people standing in front of the stage, and her eyes met striking green eyes.