Our Little Masquerade

March 24th, 2013

Boreal, California

--Mikey/Michael--

"Goodmorning baby girl." I said as I slowly closed the sliding glass door and noticed her sleepy eyes looking at me.

"Goodmorning." Her sweet sleepy voice said back. She smiled and I felt my heart drop. I felt like a horrible person for what I was about to do. She needed to try and live her life, she still had a chance.

"Hungry? We can grab something on our way to the airport?" I asked checking my phone for the time and placing it in my pocket before sitting on the edge of the bed.

"Yeah, let me get ready really quick." She said sliding out of bed slowly and dragging herself into the bathroom. Skiing took allot of energy out of you and I was hoping that was the only reason she was dragging herself. It was killing me on the inside to know that the best decision for her was to let her go for a little while.

I heard the shower start and my phone began to ring. I quickly answered it and saw Commander Davis's caller ID flash on the screen.

"Commander." I said clearing my throat.

"Are you going through with it?" He asked in a calm and justified voice.

"It's what's best." I said with regret eating away at my heart.

"I understand. I'll inform her mother and we'll make the switch at the airport; normal time." He said before hanging up. Commander Davis never said goodbye, it was quite odd but I figured it came with being a US army Commander.

I took the bags out to the car and slammed the trunk lid down. My frustration was starting to get to me, I was beginning to think I hadn't thought this all the way through. Was I really ready to lose her again? I couldn't pretend that it wasn't going to be difficult for both of us.

=-=-=-=

"How are you feeling?" I asked her as I soothingly rubbed her back. We were making our way to the meeting spot down by the airport terminal. My palms were beginning to sweat and I could feel a sick feeling forming in my throat.

We turned the corner and I found Syrah's Mom smiling broadly at her. Syrah took off towards her Mom and they collided into a hug. They spun around and I smiled at their happiness. Her Mom looked at me as though she was telepathically asking me a question. She knew about the decision I had made but, Syrah didn't.

"Honey, Michael needs to talk to you." She said nudging her towards me. Syrah looked at me with a confused expression as I wrapped my arms around her tightly.

"I know this is going to be hard for you but, I want you to go back home and finish your Senior year the way you always planned to. I talked to Logelin, he's going to be there for you every step of the way and him and I will work things out as to how I can call you. I want this for you because you deserve much more. I've cleared it with everyone and Commander Davis already has a group watching your Mother. It's safe and I promise that this isn't me pushing you away. I love you, I've always loved you. Please don't be angry." I said into her ear, hoping that she would understand.

My heart thudded against the walls of my chest and my pulse increased as I awaited her response, I could feel her hot steaming tears seeping through my T-shirt and touching my chest. Although, when she looked back at me there were no tears. I had imagined them.

" I understand." She said producing a fake smile. I knew her better than she thought I did. I could hear the pain in her voice, she wanted to cry and she was going to as soon as I walked away. She meant it when she said she understood but, she wasn't okay. Her face was looking down at the tiled floor of the airport and the regret was pouring back into my chest again.

"Look at me." I said gently bringing her chin up to face me. I leaned down and pressed my lips to hers. This kiss meant more than most of them had. All of our emotions were flooding together and despite the love and passion we had for each other, I could feel her pain and sorrow against my regret and anger.

"Michael, promise me that this isn't the end. Just a sorrowful beginning." She said with a smile on her face. Her fake smile didn't replace the hurt that I was still feeling.

"I promise. I will try my hardest to talk to you as much as I can and if it's possible I'll come see you." I said hugging her tightly. I didn't want to let her go but, I needed to. This was something she deserved, I could never forgive myself if I took one of the most important things she had away from her; her career.

"This isn't goodbye, call me as soon as you can." She said as she pulled away and looked at me one last time with her hands clenched in mine.

"I will tonight, as soon as you land if I can." My voice was choking and I was trying my absolute hardest to be the stronger one.

"I love you. Forever."

"I love you too. Always." I said as I kissed her one last time before I felt our hands un-grasp from each others and our fingertips touched for a few moments before we turned away and walked into our separate gates.

=-=-=-=

--Syrah/Safire--

I knew as soon as I sat down in my plane seat that the tears would begin to pour down my face. They did. I tried to wipe them away but they kept coming. Being strong was something I couldn't be right now.

"Honey, it's okay. I promise things will be okay." Mom said as she massaged my shoulder.

"Thank you." I said closing my eyes and watching the memories flood back to me. Michael and I had gone through so much together, more than most couples ever experienced. This wasn't goodbye but I knew that this was a temporary goodbye. His heart was in the right place but I didn't want to give up. I didn't want to go back.

The plane jolted and began to move down the runway. I looked out the window for Michael's plane, I didn't know which one he was on; I wished I did. The flight was over quickly and our small plane landed in the private airport in less than an hour.

I opened my old bedroom door and placed my few bags down on the edge of my bed before looking around. Nothing had moved, nothing had been touched. My Titanic posters, friend's drawings and pictures were all in their same places scattered across the blue walls.

I collapsed onto my bed. It was only the late afternoon and I already felt as though I was going to fall asleep; maybe it was more because I wanted to pretend like nothing was going on.

There were knocks on my bedroom door and I knew it was Mom. "Phone." She said as I opened the door. It was too early for it to be Michael, I still wished it was him though.

"Hello?" I asked into the phone.

"Syrah, it's Logelin. Come by my room. Michael wants to call you from here, it's safer." Logelin's voice sounded exactly the same as it always had. I was glad to hear a familiar voice, I loved history with Logelin and I was beginning to miss school for the first time in awhile.

I hung up the phone and picked up my purse before walking out of the front door and towards the school. Although it probably wasn't the safest things to walk to the school alone, we didn't live too far away. I texted Mom on the way and took a quick short cut. Before I knew it I was at Logelin's room.

"Syrah!" He said happily when he recognized it was me.

"Logelin!" I smiled before hugging him and setting my purse on one of the nearby desks.

"Did you walk?" Logelin asked curiously.

"Yes." I said immediately feeling the chastise coming from him.

"It's fine, why don't you go get your actual license?" He asked as I sat down in a computer chair.

"I will. May I ask for a ride home after this?" I asked leaning back and forth in the chair.

"Of course, hopefully Michael will be able to call soon." Logelin said searching something on his computer.

"Until then, let's crank up some tunes." I said smiling and beginning to re-arrange his room out of nervousness. When I was restless or hurt by something I would find myself changing things around, especially my room and right now I was incredibly restless.

After awhile of listening to music and cleaning several different things, Logelin's room couldn't be cleaned anymore and I was once again restless.

It had been about an hour and a half since I had first gotten here and my knees rose up and down impatiently as we waited for anything. Before I knew it the phone rang, startling both of us. My eyes lit up as Logelin looked at the caller ID and smiled at me.

I knew exactly who it was on that phone.