Tiptoe Through the Tulips

“What do I do?” my voice croaked, and I leant into the shoulder offered, my hands still clutching Daryl’s shirt in my hand as I choked back the sobs.

“He was so broken up Ariella, I...we all thought you were dead.” Beth’s voice rang out tearfully, hers arms finding her way around me.
“I...I thought I lost you, and you know you’re one of the only reasons I’m half sane.” I smiled at her comment, it erasing quickly as I saw the cut still healing across one wrist.

“What happened? What did you all do, no-one’s really said?” she huffed, glancing out through the open bars.
“We left and drove to the gas station to see if there was anything we needed, I don’t even remember, I was so upset and Glenn was...bad, and then we just drove to where we camped, and the others were there, well apart from Daryl and Rick. Then we had to tell everybody what had happened and we just waited for hours until they turned up.”

She inhaled sharply, chewing her lip uncomfortably, “Daryl guessed when he saw you weren’t there and it took half the group to stop him from running back Ariella, he cares so much, he was devastated, we all were, but he wasn’t right. He kept threatening to leave again. He didn’t think it was worth it without you, that’s how much he cares. And...and he was just starting to accept it and here you are, he’s confused.”

Tears dripped slowly down both of our cheeks as I moved so I was facing her, “I know you had to leave Beth and... but, I’m just so angry and hurt, and I know it’s stupid and you’re right, as far as you know I should be dead and I was to you all, but I just feel so abandoned and.... I don’t know.”

Her hand found my own again and I almost felt nauseous at the difference in cleanliness.

“I really need a bath,” I complained, trying to leave the difficult conversation behind and more on, “Where are you getting the water from?” She smiled, retracting her hand slowly and tying her hair back into a ponytail.

“There’s a well, the water supply here was cut off from all the towns and its not contaminated so we’re using that, the only problem is that the only taps that work are down in the kitchen,” I nodded, “Anyway, I’ll see if someone can sort one, Dad wants to check you out as well.”
I frowned and nodded, he would notice the bruising on my thighs, on my ribs.

He’d easily put it all together.

“That’s fine, I wanna come down with you to the kitchen first anyway, get an idea of the place.” she nodded warily, standing and causing me to follow, again running into members of the group and having what was now growing into standard comments.

“I never believed it!”
“I can't believe you are alive!”

One lie and one truth, if they didn’t believe it they would have come looking for me. Such bullshit!

“Hey you,” a deep voice rang out as we entered the canteen area, my eyes finding a smiling T-Dog instantly, but then following past him to a few men I didn’t recognise, T-dog made his way over, giving me a long hug and a deep look into my eyes, “Glad you’re back, thank god, we agreed remember, you can't leave me with the crazies... but from the sound of what Andrea and those other two...”

“Michonne and Tyreese.” I interrupted quickly, earning a nod.

“What they were saying we have trouble heading our way, most of the guys are outside now, strengthening the fence and all that crap” he ended and I giggled, peeking round him,

“And who are they?” I whispered, seeing how uncomfortable Beth looked to be in the same room as them, “They were in here when we got here, used to be convicts, helped us get rid of a lot of Walkers.”

“And do we trust them?” One must have heard me, standing and stepping in my direction, stretching one tattooed hand out to shake.
“I would hope so Miss, I’m Richard” I nodded, introducing myself and shaking his hand, his own dwarfing mine.
“And what were you in for Richard?” he smiled at me, breathing out.

“Nothing bad, well too bad, robbery. The other two were in for the same, well and Tyler beat the shit outta someone didn’t ya?”

The darker skinned man nodded, “Well he deserved it.” a deep southern accent ran out and I glanced back to T-dog who gave me a gentle nod.

“So it’s Richard, Tyler and....”

“Clint,” the last man said, his light green eyes flicking up, he pushed his damaged glasses further up his nose, “I’m the nice one.” he joked, earning a light punch from Tyler. I bit my lip and nodded, both comforted and worried by how large this group was becoming.

“Well shouldn’t you be helping outside then rather than dicking about in here?”

I said, one eyebrow raised, Tyler laughed, “I like this one, we were just having something to eat” he explained showing me the bowls and standing, “Right then lads, you heard the lady.” he winked as they left the building and I rolled my eyes.

“Men.” Beth sniggered, and T-dog followed us into the kitchen, placing the buckets in the three large sinks and starting to run the hot water.
“Shame the showers don’t work.” he breathed, heaving the large tin bath from under the counter, “We use the back room just there for bathing.” he explained, starting to pour the buckets into it.

“I suppose it will have to do my kind sir,” I teased, thanking him as he moved the half full bath into the small backroom, “We can handle the rest T.” I thanked again, saying goodbye to him and shortly after Beth.

“Dad will be about ten minutes.” she explained and I sunk into the water once she had left, feeling my pores burn slightly as I went completely under, my feet resting gently on the end of the bathtub as I slowly breathed out, enjoying the fact that I could hear nothing, see nothing.

Nothing mattered, I dragged myself up and took a deep breath, flooding my lungs with what they craved for and leaning my neck uncomfortably on the ridge scanning the various bath items on the side and smiling as I saw a razor and body cream along with the usual, once I was clean I would feel better I presumed, it had worked before, I rubbed my lips together running my tongue lightly over them as I thought.

Honestly, what could I say to Daryl, I couldn’t just fit seamlessly into what had been before. The door creaked and I sat up slightly, shielding myself even though I knew Hershel wouldn’t be bothered in the slightest, he was the closest we had to a doctor and I trusted him, “Yeah, some of the bruises look bad but they don’t hurt as....” I looked up, feeling my mouth grow dry as I noticed who had actually entered the room.

“Bruises look bad but what?” that southern accent rang out, his eyebrows raised as if to mock me but anger on his face.

“They don’t hurt much” I said quietly looking back at the distorted view of my body through the water, moving slowly to grab a towel from the pile but feeling my arms pulled back.

“Where did you get those?” he asked lowly, and I frowned, still avoiding his gaze, “Ariella, I’m not fucking kidding. Where did they come from?”

“Lots of places, its not exactly been a nice trip has it?!” I said bitterly, still trying to pull my arm from his gasp.

“Don’t be stupid.”

“Don’t call me stupid. I’m fine.” He scoffed, pulling me harder so I was forced to my feet as he glared at the marks covering me, “Does that look fine to you?” I rolled my eyes, sucking in my lips.

“Look it doesn’t matter, Hershel is coming and...”

“I know what those bruises mean” He roared, “You think I don’t living where I grew up?” I flinched at each word, his anger didn’t seem directed at the act, it was directed at me and it made me feel dirty, hideous as if it was my fault.

“Tell me who did them, was it that Tyreese fucker?” I shook my head, my arm aching where his grip tightened.

“He saved me Daryl, he stopped them from doing more.” I practically whimpered, my bone felt like it would snap under his hand.

“Daryl you’re hurting me!” his head snapped up suddenly and his clasp was dropped, I quickly brought my arm back to my body, my other hand rubbing where it ached.

The silence seemed to stretch for hours although only seconds passed, I kept going to speak but only silence, my lips opening and closing almost comically as I tried to find something to say, to argue? To defend myself, to comfort him?

I didn’t know.

The door slowly slid open and I forced myself to look up, spotting a very stressed looking Hershel, my eyes skimmed over Daryl as I turned, the tears pouring down his cheeks no doubt a mirror of my own, Hershel’s hand touched his shoulder lightly and he didn’t shake it off like expected, “Could you just give us a couple of seconds please Daryl.” Daryl gave no sign of reacting, for close to a minute he stood still before turning suddenly and leaving the small room, his hands fiercely wiping his face.

“Dear Lord Ariella,” Hershel said eventually, and he approached me slowly, his gentle hands touching my ribs, checking for breaks, he stayed far clear of the bruises making their way up my thighs. “I don’t think there were any,” he cleared his throat uncomfortably as I sat back down in the now lukewarm water, “Morning-after pills.”

I nodded assuring him my contraceptive implant should still be okay for a couple of months, “The bruising as well, we do have a cream but it will be less effective on old ones, and all I suggest with the ribs is to bandage them up, which I’ll do for once you’re ready.”
“Thank-you Hershel, I'd...I'd rather no-one else knew.” He nodded slowly, leaving the room and leaving me time to think, to wash my hair, shave everywhere needed.

Time to cry at how broken Daryl Dixon looked.

I was just dressing when frantic shouting caught my attention and I ran out of the room, crashing into Tyreese, “They’re outside... He’s outside.” He said frantically.

“He is not fucking happy.”