Glass Heart

The sun was shining down on Scarlett where she lay face down on Tony’s bed where she was still asleep and very comfortable at that. The sound of something electronic buzzing to life woke her up, causing her to jump awake and alert. Paranoia was unavoidable considering her past. Had the beautiful night she’d had been a really vivid dream? Maybe she hadn’t been safely asleep in Tony’s bed and she’d simply wanted to be so badly that her mind had comforted her with what she couldn’t possibly have. Perhaps she’d open her eyes and realize she was in some test facility being poked and prodded by MedCo. Realizing at once that she was exactly where she expected to be Scarlett glanced around curiously. Though she was relieved to be in his bed, she was disheartened to see that Tony was nowhere to be found.

Where had he gone? Why had he left her? The first thing Scarlett did was worry, and not about herself, but about Tony. Had he been okay with what had happened between them the night before? Was he having second thoughts about monogamy? She somehow thought there was no chance of that. Some kind of faith in him had been built when he’d come to save her from the jail even after she’d betrayed him in one of the worst ways. Maybe he’d become sick overnight or perhaps called to arms as Iron Man. It would be weird getting accustomed to dating a so-called super hero. Sitting up slowly, Scarlett rubbed the side of her head which was still pounding, but nowhere near as horribly as it had been the night before.

“What time is it, Jarvis?” Considering that she’d perhaps slept in too long for Tony’s tastes she waited for the response from the computer but found none. It was unlike Jarvis not to respond to her and that made her nervous. “Jarvis, are you there?”

“I have been advised to no longer follow your commands, Miss Damien. My sincerest apologies.” Scarlett’s chest stung at first with betrayal, but she honestly couldn’t blame Tony for taking such precautions after she’d already broken through his home defenses once before. But why would he have suddenly implemented such measures considering how they’d made up? After she’d broken into his computers, she’d been limited but not ignored, by the machine. Scarlett was guessing she was lucky to even be made aware of the new arrangement. Then again, Jarvis likely wasn’t supposed to tell her that either. It didn’t make sense. Scarlett was becoming increasingly concerned that something had happened to Tony.

“Okay, I guess that means I can’t ask where Tony went or if he’s okay, can I?” Scarlett glanced toward the ceiling and received no response still from Jarvis. Shivering, she felt oddly cold and alone without Jarvis there to keep her company. She’d grown so used to the artificially intelligent omnipresent butler that it made her sad not to be able to talk to him anymore. Maybe if she kept earning Tony’s trust back little by little she’d be allowed permission to communicate with him again.

Turning her attention back to her surroundings, Scarlett saw that the source of the electronic buzz that had roused her from sleep had been the flat screen television mounted on the far wall coming to life. She ignored it at first and started looking around for the remote control to turn it off since she couldn’t request for Jarvis to do it. It was her guess that Tony had it set on a timer to turn on when he woke up in the morning so he could check the reports on his stocks and other news around the world.

The stories being told on the news didn’t catch her attention until she found the remote. She was about to pick it up when the familiar blond television personality appeared on the screen. The program switched from economical reports to something less serious and geared toward the masses.

“New in celebrity gossip, billionaire Tony Stark is in the news once again, much to no one’s surprise by now.” Scarlett froze and turned to glance at the television at long last. The female reporter chuckled like she’d said the funniest thing in the world. It wasn’t odd for Tony to be on the news, nonetheless the gossip portion, given his popularity but Scarlett had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. Was Tony trying to sabotage what they had before it got further than just explosive sex? She thought that was something she was more likely to do than he was. Trying to have as much faith in Tony as she could, considering their history, she continued to listen to the story in hopes it wasn’t going to say what she was half expecting it to report.

“Late in the night, our offices received a call from the genius himself with a juicy new story.” Pictures popped up on the screen of Tony and Scarlett at the charity event, which she guessed were the only ones available of the two. “Despite earlier claims that the woman on Tony’s arm that night was simply a business colleague, we’ve heard differently from Tony himself and pretty convincing details.” Scarlett’s stomach started to churn and ache as Tony’s voice was played on the screen over the montage of pictures of them together at the charity event. The throbbing in her head worsened when she realized she was holding her breath while she listened.

“Yeah, that’s Scarlett Damien. She’s really… fiery as hell and despite her objections she’s all over me when we’re alone. You know, even that night, when she told the reporter so rudely she wasn’t my date for the event and after the chaos of everything that followed, things got really steamy. Real dynamite if you know what I mean. Not much I couldn’t get her to do, to be honest… Those legs…” Unconsciously Scarlett pulled the silk sheets to cover hers nude form up, suddenly very uncomfortable being naked in Tony’s room on her own. She tried to tune out the rest of the report, fumbling around for the remote control but had lost it somewhere in the sheets when she’d pulled them up.

Tony’s voice drilled into her mind despite how she’d tried to ignore it, telling the reporters more than half of the dirty intimate details of the things they’d done in bed together, private details that Scarlett wasn’t willing to share, at least not at the moment. In general, Scarlett wasn’t ashamed of her sexuality or the things she’d done, but she could barely stand the idea of telling the reporters she was in an exclusive relationship with one of the most powerful men on the planet nonetheless dealing with having the public suddenly look at her like exactly what she’d work so hard not to be: another slut on Tony’s arm with a pretty face.

Finally the reporter interrupted Tony’s ramblings about Scarlett’s sexual prowess to ask if this meant that he was in a serious relationship with someone. His answer was “for the time being” then the reporter went through the necessary niceties of thanking him for the information but Scarlett had long since tuned it out. It sounded like Tony hadn’t any faith in the longevity of their relationship and it was like a slap in the face for Scarlett.

“So that’s that ladies. Tony Stark is officially off the market, well, for now at least.” There was little to no faith in the truth of his claim of monogamy with the woman he’d described in the reporter’s voice. Scarlett wondered if she was wrong for having ever thought the man could be tied down to just one woman. Hadn’t they discussed the meaning of a relationship the night before? Hadn’t he told her that he wasn’t afraid to be with just her, only her? Scarlett half expected Pepper to walk into the room and tell her to get her things and leave like she’d heard Tony had done before with women he brought home for the night.

Hands trembling with nerves, Scarlett finally managed to turn off the television with the remote and threw it across the room afterward like it’d bit her. Pulling her knees close to her chest, she closed her eyes and rested her head against her knees. She had to strengthen her resolve, but her eyes stung with upset, something she wasn’t used to expressing over something that seemed so trivial in the span of things. Tears never suited her, particular not in matters of the heart but then again she’d never really made her heart that vulnerable before, not since her childhood. Blinking away any of the emotion she’d built up while she’d heard the report, she slowly lifted her head. Her stomach was turning and aching miserably. She was sure if she had eaten anything in the past few days she’d be throwing it up. After all that had transpired, her nerves were completely shot. Even the strongest person would’ve been shaken and worn down when all was said and done. It seemed as though Scarlett was finally reaching her breaking point when it came to stress.

The first thing Tony had done after being given her trust in such a dramatic way had been to break it and horribly at that. It was one thing for him to tell the public he was in a relationship and another thing entirely to go on and on about their sexual escapades. Her hands were still trembling when she finally got out of the bed. She found Tony’s shirt on the floor and slipped it on temporarily. Walking out of the room she hurried to the guest room to get into the first thing she could find which was a simple black dress, then hurriedly threw on the necessary undergarments as she did. Without shoes she hurried down the stairs and was stopped by Pepper who was smiling, though it was a forced smile, at her. When she saw the expression on Scarlett’s face, Pepper’s kind air quickly faded.

“What’s wrong?”

“Where is he?” Scarlett choked out, surprised at the upset in her voice.

“He’s downstairs. Did something happen? You don’t look well. Should I call the doctor?” Pepper, despite her dislike and distrust of Scarlett, was still concerned. She didn’t think Scarlett was a bad person, just that she wasn’t to be trusted.

“Oh, pretty sure Tony lost his mind.” Scarlett walked past Pepper without another word. As much as she respected the woman who had long put up with Tony’s antics before he’d become a better man, or at least Scarlett had thought he’d become a better man, she didn’t have time to talk it out with Pepper. Her heart was already breaking in her chest and if she didn’t call Tony out on what he’d done right then and there she was sure she’d run for cover.

Scarlett wasn’t as ready to throw away her romance with Tony as he apparently was. So she marched down the stairs and placed her hand on the security key to gain access to his laboratory. When entrance was denied, Scarlett slammed her fist against the wall in frustration and cursed loudly.

“If you don’t open this goddamn door right now Tony I’m going to break it!” Tony turned to glance at Scarlett through the glass wall that separated the hallway from his laboratory. He’d had his back turned to her initially, sitting in his computer chair and fiddling with something on his screen. She couldn’t see what it was and she didn’t care.

“Jarvis, open the door.” Tony turned away from her in his chair again and despite his nonchalance Scarlett could feel the heaviness hanging over his head like a thick cloud in the room. “What do you want?” Tony glanced sideways at her. She looked a fright, her hair a crazy mess, no shoes and her dress fitting her improperly since she didn’t take the time to fix it after she’d gotten into it. On top of that he could see that her eyes looked red and he knew it wasn’t from the lack of sleep.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” Scarlett was once again surprised to be met with the lack of emotion from Tony. Where was the man that she’d gotten to know so well? How could he treat her so callously after what they’d been through together and what they’d agreed to the night before?

“A number of things, but what are you referring to? You’re the one marching in here looking like a bad prom date.” Tony spun in his chair to face her head on, glaring coldly at her. The warmth she’d always seen in his peculiar colored eyes was gone and faded. Scarlett stood with her mouth agape, unsure of what was happening.

“How could you do that after what we’ve been through together?”

“Do what?”

“Don’t play like you’re naïve. You know exactly what I’m talking about. You said all that stuff to the media after…” Scarlett accused, filling her tone with anger to hide the hurt she felt.

“What, after you let me bend you over and teach you a lesson?” A smirk curled on Tony’s lips but there was no playful nature to it as there had been before. Something about the way he was talking felt hurtful and cruel. Behind his stone cold demeanor, he was cursing at himself mentally. He’d spent hours upon hours sitting at his desk and contemplating what to do next. After analyzing his feelings, he knew that this thing with Scarlett would lead eventually to heartache, at least in his own mind. Scarlett would someday find out about Scott, and even if she didn’t, she’d find some other fault in him and leave him and ultimately hurt him. He’d almost forgotten why he didn’t do long term relationships. Giving up his life to another person was too hard for a man as selfish as him. But even when he’d hung up the phone after calling the reporter during the night he knew he’d made a terrible mistake.

Tony Stark also wasn’t the type to admit when he was wrong and instead he’d spent hours, without sleep, tossing the situation over in his mind. Lack of sleep had then clouded his judgment further and only succeeded in making matters more complex. Between what Scarlett had done to him after their first night together and how his heart was still filled with conflicting feelings, he did the only thing he knew how to do when it came to matters of the heart and women. He ran scared with his tail between his legs and fell back into his womanizing ways. Now with Scarlett standing in front of him, clearly in pain and not making any effort to hide it as she had done in the past, Tony struggled. Maybe he’d just confess what had driven him to this point. He rejected the notion immediately.

“I trusted you.” Scarlett wasn’t sure what else to say. Once again, she wanted to cover up and hide from the world. She felt used and discarded, which was not something Scarlett had ever felt in a relationship setting before.

“Look, I don’t see what the big deal is.” Tony got up from where he’d been seated and then walked confidently toward her. If he could try and channel the man who he’d been before Afghanistan then maybe he’d get through this. Deep down, he knew that part of him was long dead.

“You don’t see what the big deal is? Really?” Scarlett scoffed in disbelief.

“So, I told them about us. What’s the problem? Are you ashamed? Are you embarrassed? They’d find out at some point anyway so what does it matter?” Tony scowled and held his hands in front of him, proudly displaying himself. “I’m Tony fucking Stark and the media knows what I’m up to one way or another. I’d rather be the one to tell them then have some reporter sniffing around and finding the truth before I got a chance to say it.”

“I wasn’t ready!” Scarlett placed a hand to her forehead and wrinkled her face in misery. It was taking every bit of her resolve not to scream at him and tell him what an asshole he was for breaking the already fragile trust she’d given him. “I’m not ashamed or embarrassed by what I did.”

“Well, maybe you should be.” Scarlett could see the fear behind Tony’s eyes, but his words hurt more than she could describe.

“Despite you, I’m not embarrassed by what we did. I’m not ready for the media because it’s dangerous with my history, Stark.” Scarlett was about to continue to explain her fears about MedCo. If he was simply scared of taking the next step of their relationship, maybe explaining her personal fears would help to calm him down and allow them to find a solution to the mess he’d made.

“Well not everything’s up to you, now is it, Scarlett?” Tony interrupted before she could get another word out.

“I only asked that one thing of you and the first thing you did when you got the chance was betray your word.” Despite his continued aloof behavior, Scarlet attempted to plead with him and to get him to see why she was upset. She wasn’t sure if he’d see her logic at this point, something told her that he was at war in his head and he wasn’t going to let her take his hand and fight the battle with him. Had he felt this frustrated with her when she hadn’t told him the truth about MedCo?

“Well, then I guess we’re even aren’t we?” Tony narrowed his eyes at her. Scarlett was at a loss for words. “You break into my systems and leave me hanging in bed when I expected you to be there and I broke my first promise to you. Doesn’t that wipe the slate clean between us?” Tony knew there was no excuse for what he’d done. He’d forgiven her for her actions and yet here he was holding it over her head like she’d deserved everything he was about to put her through.

Scarlett’s faith in them took a nose dive. Relationships had never been her thing. Even as a kid she’d never kept friends close by. She was kidding herself to think that she could’ve made this work with anyone, nonetheless Tony Stark. It wasn’t that she didn’t think she could fight for it, but she wasn’t sure she was strong enough to do that and conquer the emotional battle in her head. She would have to do one or the other, not both.

“Is this how it’s always going to be for us?” Finally she spoke, her voice less angry and quieter than before, filled with pain. Tony could see the wound he’d inflicted and it hurt him just as badly to watch her go through it.

“What do you mean?”

“Are we constantly going to be trying to one up each other to see who can make the other hurt the worst until one of us gives?” Scarlett turned away and wiped her hand over her face nervously. The damage had been done. Wiping away the moisture in her eyes, Scarlett turned back to face him once she was sure there was no sign of it. “Well, Stark, you win.”

“You’re overreacting, Scarlett.” The heartache was written all over her face and he suddenly knew he’d pushed things way too far.

“No, I’m not.” Shaking her head, Scarlett looked around the familiar laboratory and wondered if this would be the last time she saw it. She realized then that she had never actually considered leaving it. For the first time in her life, she thought she’d had somewhere that she wanted to come back to but now knew it was out of the question. “I’m so stupid.” Tony watched her fall apart in front of him, his heart dropping in his chest. “I don’t know how I thought this would work. I don’t know how I convinced myself that this made sense. In the end, you’re still you and I’m still me and…” Before she could finish and explain herself Tony walked closer, anger and hurt on his face.

“That’s right, I’m still the chauvinistic womanizer you thought I was when we first met. Of course you’re stupid, Scarlett. You really thought I’d change? For you? How self serving. You’re an idiot for thinking I’d be anything else than what I was when you met me!” Tony pointed an accusing finger at her to which she backed away from. His face was contorted in anger and fear, where it’d come from, he had no idea.

“That’s not what I meant.” Scarlett wrinkled her brow in surprise.

“What, you think that I could really settle down for a woman like you?”

“Let me finish!” She shouted but Tony wasn’t listening to her anymore.

“You thought you were special? You’re just like the women before you: naïve and just as willing to take your clothes off!” This time Scarlett didn’t respond and merely covered her mouth so she wouldn’t start shouting angry words at him. He’d hit the nerve he was looking for and continued to press on it. “You’re pathetic for thinking I could love you.” That was when it hit Tony. That’s why he was so afraid. Tony Stark, the man who couldn’t be tied down to one woman, was head over heels in love with someone he’d met only a handful of weeks prior. If she’d left him for someone else, it would’ve crushed him. In his heart he was already sure she was the only one for him and yet he was terrified to give up the control that would require. The anger left his face and he looked down at the ground. He saw Scarlett’s bare feet backing away from him.

“I’m sorry.” He exhaled quietly, amazed at the hurtful things he’d said in a rush of fear and emotion. “Scarlett, I’m sorry.”

“No,” Scarlett couldn’t believe he’d said those things to her. Where was the man she’d fallen for? Maybe she didn’t know him as well as she thought she had. Maybe she’d fallen for some elaborate attempt at revenge. “I’m an idiot.” She nodded her head and took another step away from him. Tony reached to grab her hand but she shook her head no and stepped further away.

“I didn’t mean it, Scarlett… I didn’t mean any of it!” Panicking again, Tony wasn’t sure what to say to undo the hurt he’d caused. “I love you. I love you.” He pled, resting his hand over the arc reactor in his chest. It’d been something he’d been too terrified to think, nonetheless say out loud only moments ago and there he was just shouting it to her like his life depended on it. Still staring at him in disbelief, Scarlett knew deep down she’d be a fool to continue believing him at that point. But the words still stung. Why couldn’t he have loved her? She would’ve loved him. She would’ve given him her whole heart. When it came down to it, she realized the night before that she would’ve done anything for him and now she’d have to come to terms with the fact that none of it had been true. She’d been made a fool of at her own game. “Please.” She hadn’t realized Tony had walked cautiously closer to her again. “Please forgive me.”

“No.” Scarlett shook her head, but her words were still hard to find and manage properly.

“I was panicked. Scarlett, I freaked out. You were trusting me and I… what if you rejected me or I screwed up or was assuming things… I was afraid you’d leave me.”

“So you said all those horrible things to what? Plead to my good nature?” Scarlett jeered, her voice still low and sounding weak. She didn’t care about looking fragile in front of Tony anymore. He’d hurt her and he should feel bad about it.

“No, that’s not it. I thought if I pushed you away first then it wouldn’t hurt but I didn’t know I was…”

“Wait, I’m the idiot?” Scarlett’s hurt was masked by anger.

“I sabotage things, it’s what I do. Just like you were sabotaging yourself before now… I…” Tony was having a hard time saying what was in his head, which was never the case before. No matter how he twisted his words, none of it could form the proper apology.

“Well, you did a damn good job,” Scarlett whispered. “You can’t say you love me and expect things to magically be forgiven. How am I supposed to believe you? One breath you’re telling me that I’m a slut and then in the next you love me! You know why you can’t love me, Tony? Because love implies you’re something other than selfish.” Scarlett hissed in frustration and upset. How was she supposed to believe his confession wasn’t just Tony’s attempt to take what he’d done and make it disappear so he wouldn’t have to deal with the repercussions? She wasn’t going to take the verbal abuse from him. He’d hurt her. Tony had taken everything he knew about her and had twisted his words in design to cause her pain and push her away and it had been more than successful.

Tony’s face fell. He’d finally managed to confess what was in his heart and it didn’t work. Not that he could blame her. She had no reason to trust him and no reason to believe that he really did love her. When he thought about it, it really did sound like he was trying to use that as way of an apology even when it wasn’t the case. Instead of pleading with her and trying to work it out he turned cruel again. The fear of being rejected had become a reality and by his own making.

“You’re right.” Tony shook his head, the anger and hurt he was feeling toward his stupidity and inability to deal with emotional situations exploding at Scarlett. “I don’t love you. I don’t love anything! Get the hell out! Get the hell out of my house, you have overstayed your welcome!”

“Tony!” Pepper had been watching for quite some time and had tried to stay out of it until that point. Tony pointed at his assistant threateningly which silenced her immediately. Starting to slowly approach Scarlett again he continued on his angry rant. She backed away from him as he spoke, feeling ill and unsure how to handle the anger being expressed toward her. It wasn’t like she was incapable of arguing with him and turning his words against him but the urge wasn’t there. She didn’t want to hurt Tony anymore.

“Go run to your stupid little boyfriend, Scott, since you miss him so damn much!” The words were pouring out of Tony’s mouth before he’d considered saying them.

“Scott’s dead.” Scarlett felt her back touch the glass of the wall as Tony continued to approach her. “And it was never like this with him. I never wanted him the way that I want you.” Scarlett whispered, in awe of how painful the situation had become but Tony wasn’t listening to what she had to say, she wasn’t even sure he heard her.

“I’m sure you’re pining for him anyway. You think I didn’t consider that? I’m not a goddamn rebound!”

“Would you stop yelling at me?” Scarlett shouted back in retaliation. Pepper was watching in stunned horror. She may not have been Scarlett’s biggest fan but she didn’t expect Tony to lash out at her like that.

“He’s not dead! He’s in a hospital recovering in Africa. All that guilt you felt? Completely unfounded because he’s doing just fine. So why don’t you go run to him? I’m done putting up with you.” Tony waved toward the door angrily.

“Scott’s alive?” Scarlett was blindsided by this new information. If Scott hadn’t been shot then things were completely different. She could find out more about what happened with MedCo from him. But the situation at hand was implying that she’d run to Scott for a romantic fling which wasn’t the case. She wasn’t interested in being back with him but she did think she owed it to him to at least let him know that she was alive and fighting for them so he could move on just like she would be able to. Her mind was racing on top of everything else happening with Tony. She couldn’t properly comprehend what Scott being alive meant, other than the fact that Tony seemed to think it would change how she felt about him.

“Yeah he’s alive, I found his hospital records!” Tony shouted.

“Why wouldn’t you tell me that when you first found out?” Scarlett whispered, still trying to wrap her fragile mind around the situation at hand. Between the heartache she was feeling and the fear of the unknown, the idea of Scott being alive didn’t seem to matter in the grand scheme of things. She didn’t love Scott. She never had and she didn’t think she ever would or that she wanted to even try to salvage any romance between them.

“Doesn’t matter much now, does it? Who cares why I didn’t tell you? Get out! I needed a good fuck and you did your job well, didn’t you? Now you’re just as boring as any other stupid broad I brought back to bed. You think I still want to see you naked after that?” Scarlett couldn’t think about Scott with Tony yelling at her and twisting what they’d done to hurt her. It was the first time he’d ever told her she’d bored him.

Glancing up at him, she gave up on trying to hide how hurt she was and blinked away the tears that were forming freely now in her eyes. Somehow she knew he didn’t mean what he was saying but it didn’t make it okay that it was being said. She started to speak several times and stopped when she couldn’t find the right words. There was nothing she could say to fix the situation so instead Tony kept ranting.

“What are you waiting for, huh?” Tony stepped closer, staring down at her. It wasn’t true. She wasn’t boring. His heart ached for her and being so close to her again all he wanted to do was kiss her, get on his knees and beg for her forgiveness. But if she didn’t want to love him after he’d confessed how he felt then why should he waste his time? “Would you rather me have Pepper throw you out like garbage or walk out on your own? You’re not welcome here anymore and haven’t been for a long time! Just go! Walk away.”

Scarlett shook her head and pushed him away from her before heading toward the door. She was humiliated enough. She wasn’t going to cry in front of him too. Finally she’d opened herself emotionally enough to trust someone romantically and it’d been shoved in her face. Without a word she headed through the door and up the stairs, shaking from head to toe with anger and hurt.

“Scarlett…” Pepper felt awful watching the fight happen between the two of them. It wasn’t even much of a fight. Scarlett hadn’t thrown up walls or called out nasty words, it was just the man she knew hadn’t meant them screaming at her. When Scarlett ignored her and continued hurriedly up the stairs, Pepper turned her attention to Tony. “Tony, what the hell is wrong with you?”

“Don’t start with me, Pepper.” Tony watched Scarlett disappear and felt his heart ache painfully. He turned around toward his desk, unable to shake the anger and disgust he was feeling with himself. There was no foreseeable solution to the problem he’d created.

“How could you say those things to her?” Pepper wasn’t going to back down so easily.

“Get the hell out! Now!” Tony shouted, grabbing one of the paperweights off of his desk and tossing it in his hands. He then proceeded to throw it across the room in anger where it split into pieces and bounced across the room. Then he knocked his monitors off of his desk, the frames shattering and spreading across the floor. He wiped his hands over his desk and knocked his belongings to the ground in anger.

Pepper shrieked in surprise and started up the stairs and ran after Scarlett. Maybe she could convince the woman to reconsider and then get Tony to apologize. While she still didn’t forgive the woman for what she’d done she knew Tony hadn’t meant to lash out the way he had. Running from the sound of things breaking and being thrown across the room, Pepper continued after Scarlett.

“Please, don’t listen to him! He doesn’t know what he’s saying.”

“Leave me alone.” Scarlett sniffled and hurried through the house. She couldn’t collect her thoughts. Nothing made sense. In fact, she could barely breathe.

She’d never had her heart broken before.