Shut Your Eyes

“I don’t want to leave.”

Sid’s honey eyes searched for mine in the low light that streamed in through the window. I softly smiled at him from the other side of the bed.

“You have to.”

He blinked slowly before sighing. “I know.”

“I’m fine, really. You don’t have to worry about me.” I whispered into the air.

He smirked at me. “I know you’re fine, I’m worried about me. I sleep better when you’re only a few inches away.”

I rolled my eyes before poking him in the ribs. A tired chuckle rumbled through his chest.

“You’ve got to get out of bed, babe.”

Sidney grabbed a pillow and buried his head beneath it before he huffed and I heard the muffled sound of a “fine” coming from beneath the fluff. He rolled out of bed, throwing the pillow back at me. When he realized that I was still sitting in bed clutching the pillow he had rocketed in my direction, he cocked his head to one side and raised an eyebrow.

“I thought you said we had to get out of the bed.”

I pulled the blankets closer to my chin and snuggled into the mattress. “I said you had to get out of bed. I didn’t say that I had to.”

Within seconds the warm covers were pulled back and I was lifted into the air. Sid tossed me over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes and headed for the door with a laugh. “If I’m getting up, so are you.”

“But what if I’m still sleepy?” I questioned, matching his chuckle with one of my own.

“I’ll make you eggs.”

“What if I want waffles?”

Sid lightly pinched the back of my thigh in response as he brought us downstairs. “Well I don’t know how to cook waffles, so you’re getting eggs. If you’re nice to me I might make you some bacon to go with it.”

“Color me impressed.”

Setting me down onto the counter, he placed his arms on either side of my legs and gave me a grin. “You should be. I don’t cook for just anyone.”

My fingers absentmindedly played with the frayed hem of his t-shirt sleeve. “You barely cook for yourself.”

“Then I guess that makes you extra-special.” Sidney informed me with a wink.

His wink, as usual, pulled a real smile out of my early-morning sleepy smirk.

“Sunny side up, please.”



The ride to the arena was quiet.

A strip of sunlight was rising over the edge of my world, painting the city with pinks and purples. In the background I could barely hear whatever radio station Sid had playing. He kept the volume low, and his yawns broke through the near-silence every few minutes.

He had barely slept the night before.

I hadn’t enjoyed much sleep either, both of us talking quietly into the wee hours of the morning, but even when I’d begun to drift off I could still feel his eyes on me like some sort of guard dog. Watching for signs that I wasn’t as alright as I claimed.

A part of me knew that I would be receiving those looks from him for a while.

Instead of telling him to stop, though, I just closed my eyes and let myself sleep. Eventually he would look at my face and see something other than the shadows of bruises that were no longer there. Wounds that had long since healed.

“I think I forgot to turn the coffee pot off.” Sidney remarked from the driver’s seat, pulling me out of my thoughts.

“I’ll turn it off when I get back there.”

He looked over at me with a confused expression. “You’re not going to the condo afterwards?”

“The jeep is at your house.” I reminded him softly.

His face lit with recognition and he sighed out an agreement. “That’s right, I forgot. It’s too early.”

I smiled and rubbed his arm gently. I hadn’t completely fibbed – my jeep was sitting in his driveway, covered in a nice layer of frost – but I certainly hadn’t given him my real reason for wanting to return to Sidney’s home instead of the condo I shared with Max. Mainly, there was a huge bed upstairs with sheets and pillows that smelled like the man I was about to put on a plane.

But he didn’t need to know that.

Soon we pulled into the dark lot of the arena and parked near the other players. Sid got out first, coming around to open my door for me before I could manage to get my seatbelt undone in my tired haze.

“I’m going to grab my bags, why don’t you go find Max. He’s probably wondering why you didn’t come home last night.”

I nodded, feeling Sidney press a kiss onto my beanie. My eyes scanned the group of players that had congregated near the bus. I spotted Max laughing with a group of them, so I wrapped my coat tighter around my frame and headed in his direction.

In true Max fashion he spotted me before I was even halfway to where he was standing.

“Margaux!” A familiar toothy grin spilled onto his face. He welcomed me into the small group of players and slung an arm around my shoulder, offering me a sip of his coffee with his other hand. “You must be tired, out all night with a boy.”

Dupuis gave me an amused look. “A boy? Do we know this boy?”

“You should introduce us to him, Maggie. We’ll be nice.” Jordan chimed in with a grin.

I simply rolled my eyes. “Max.”

“Fine, fine. I’ll drop it. I’m just glad I got to see you before we left.”

“Always.”

As the other people around us broke into another conversation, Max leaned down to whisper into my ear. “You look happy. Like some weight has been lifted.”

I smiled up at him. “I am happy. Very happy. And I’ll be even happier when you boys come home undefeated.”

Max grinned and rubbed his hands together a bit. “I think we can make that happen.”

Sidney popped up behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist in a hug. “What’re we making happen?”

“Coming back undefeated. Max seems to think it’s a piece of cake.” Jordan answered.

Sid smiled. “It is a piece of cake. We’ll make it happen. We better make it happen.”

“Yes sir.” Dupuis joked before nodding his head in the direction of the bus. “I think that’s our cue.”

The boys gave me their goodbyes, side hugs and head pats – the occasional kiss on the cheek, and Max pulled me away from Sidney long enough to get a proper hug in before having to leave.

“Call you when we’re settled.” He promised.

“You better.”

He walked off and I was pulled back into Sid’s arms.

“You’re going to be late if you don’t hurry.” I warned him with a grin.

“I’m pretty sure they won’t leave without me.”

“You never know.”

He smiled down at me and gave me a quick kiss, and then another, before pulling away. “I’ll miss you. Don’t let V ruin the house while I’m gone.”

“I promise.”

With a wink he moved away, jogging back to the bus where the rest of the team was waiting impatiently for him. A thin arm laced itself through mine and Vero laid her head onto my shoulder.

“Please tell me we can go back to bed.”

I rubbed her shoulder a bit and led her back towards Sid’s car. “You read my mind.”



A few hours later, once we’d gotten our fill of sleep, Vero and I woke up. We were snuggled deep into my bed, avoiding having to rejoin the cold world outside of our blankets.

“What’s the plan for today?” Vero asked with a hint of sleep still weighing her voice down.

“I don’t think there is a plan. I was going to go downtown for some new canvases, might get lunch. Could use some company.”

Vero smiled from her spot next to me. “Good, because I was coming along anyways.”

“Just as soon as we convince ourselves to get out of bed.” I giggled.

She laughed and shot me a sly look. “I notice that’s something you’ve been struggling with quite a lot recently.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Don’t be coy. I saw who you showed up with this morning, and I would bet a lot of money that this is the first time you’ve slept in this bed today in the last few days.”

Rolling my eyes, I conceded. “Fine. You caught me. I was there late last night and didn’t feel like driving in the icy darkness, thank you very much.”

“Oh, I’m sure it was completely a safety issue.”

I glanced over at her and she raised her eyebrows, almost as if challenging me to deny her claims. I settled instead for whipping the covers back and letting the cold air hit the both of us like a bag of bricks.

“Time to get up, V. We’ve got errands to run.”

“We aren’t done talking about this!”

I got out of bed, ignoring her, and headed for my closet. “I promise that we’ll have plenty of time to talk about it when you’re helping me unpack the rest of Sidney’s house. All of his furniture is being delivered in a couple of days.”

She huffed loudly so I could know she wasn’t happy by the delay, but I knew she would come around and be more than happy to dive into the conversation when I was ready to have it. Vero was good at that. Even though she might exist in a constant state of curiosity, she would never intentionally pry farther than she knew she was allowed.

Soon she popped her head into my closet and grinned. “Can I borrow your purple coat?”



The sky was bright and clear as we ventured downtown. We took a quick pit stop at our favorite coffee shop, a quiet little place with mismatched coffee cups and black and white photos decorating the walls. After ordering one coffee and one hot cocoa, as well as a couple of croissants, the two of us braved the cold air outside and wandered down the sidewalk to the art store.

Penny greeted us as we walked in. She had grown used to my frequent visits, and to Vero’s presence beside me, and was now in the habit of calling us by name.

“Maggie, Vero, how good to see you!”

“It’s good to see you too, Penny. Have you guys been staying busy?” Vero asked as I was immediately distracted by the new display of paintbrushes by the door.

“It’s on and off. Always depends on the weather outside. Today has been pretty steady, though. Can’t complain.”

“It’s not too bad outside today, you’ll probably get a wave of customers after lunch.” I commented without looking up. Thankfully Penny knew not to take my distraction as disinterest, she knew I was in a different state of mind when surrounded by new paints and fresh supplies.

“Don’t jinx the quiet, Maggie.”

“Did you guys move the canvases?” I asked in confusion.

“Oh, yeah! They’re over where the tripods used to be. We switched the painting and photography displays around.”

“Thank you.” I wandered off with a smile. Eager to see if they had gotten the black canvases I’d asked about during my previous visit, I almost missed the large ‘FOR RENT’ sign hung with care on the staircase that led to the apartment upstairs.

A small flyer with a write-up of the apartment details was attached to the sign. It was a two bedroom with lots of natural light and exposed brick walls. The kitchen had been recently renovated, and large red letters informed me of the original hardwood flooring.

Behind me, I could hear Penny and Vero chatting about something or other. I walked back over to them and leaned against the counter.

“Are the canvases not over there? I’m going to kill Scott, I swear. He gets everything mixed up – last week he put the new sculpting clay over in the kids section with the play-”

I laughed and stopped Penny in the middle of her tirade. “Penny! It’s fine, I saw where the canvases were.”

She looked confused. “Did you see the black ones? I ordered them just for you, are they the wrong ones?”

“I’m sure they’re fine. I was actually wondering about the sign on the stairs.”

“The ‘for rent’ sign?”

“Mhmm. You haven’t found anyone to take it yet?” I asked as I tried to keep the interest out of my voice.

She sighed and shook her head. “Nope. We’ve had some people look at it, but everyone’s worried about being downtown or living over a shop. They think it’s going to be too loud, or they’re worried about the outside entrance. Too picky.”

“Oh, okay.” We all stood in a strange silence for a moment before I bit the bullet. “Do you mind if I take a look at it? I’m a bit curious to see it.”

Beside me, Vero grinned wildly. Penny looked surprised but reached into the drawer and handed me the keys. “Knock yourself out. Silver key is for the door to the stairs, brass is for the apartment. If you’ve got any questions, just yell.”

“You mentioned an outside entrance?”

“Yeah, there’s a fire escape that doesn’t pull up like the newer ones do. Goes down from the balcony. The door to the balcony is dead bolted, though, so don’t let that scare you off.”

Vero followed me closely as we headed towards the stairs. She was practically bouncing with each step. “You didn’t tell me you were looking at apartments!”

“I didn’t know I was looking at apartments until I saw the sign on the stairs. Besides, I’m not seriously looking. I’m just curious. I’ve been to this shop a million times, and I’ve never seen the upstairs. Aren’t you curious?”

“I’m curious as to why you keep playing everything off today. You didn’t drive home last night because it was dark, we’re looking at an apartment simply because you’re curious to see what it looks like – just to name a couple.”

I rolled my eyes, but unlocked the door to the stairs and led us both inside. The stairwell was dark and in desperate need of an update. Vero had a somewhat harsher reaction to the look.

“Did they have the set designer from The Shining come up with this?”

“Oh hush, V. It just needs some new lights and a fresh coat of light paint, that’s all.”

“You’re probably right. That better be job number one.”

“I’m not buying this place, Vero.” I reminded her carefully.

“I’ll remind of that when we’re moving your furniture in.”

“Mhmm.”

We moved upstairs and unlocked the door to the apartment, preparing for the worst. Instead of a dark, slightly scary place like the stairwell we were greeted with a flood of sunlight streaming in from windows that scaled almost to the ceiling in what I only assumed was the living room.

“Oh, Margaux. This is beautiful!”

Vero was right. The apartment was absolutely gorgeous. The exposed brick walls gave it an industrial feel, but the vintage hardwood floors brought it back and made it homey. A few rugs and lots of candles could make it homey.

Seeing that V had begun to wander throughout the apartment, I began to explore it as well. The kitchen was beautiful, and sat right next to a small space where I could fit a dining room table. There were only two bathrooms – and one was attached to the master bedroom – but they both had showers and new fixtures. Speaking of the bedroom, it was bigger than I’d expected, and it had floor to ceiling windows just as the living room had.

Vero and I met back up in the living room and she was beaming. “So, where do you sign?”

“Vero,”

She interrupted me with a wave of her hand. “Maggie, don’t start. This apartment is perfect for you, and you need a space that’s all your own! I can only imagine how frustrated you are by bouncing back and forth between two spaces that aren’t yours. I know you. You need space, and you’re not getting any of it at the condo or at Sidney’s house.”

I was silent as she stared at me. In a way, she was completely right. It was a bit tiring not having a place of my own where I could get away from everything. “I suppose that’s true…”

“And just think, here you could meet clients or even use the media space off of the living room as an art room. You could paint in there, and store your photography equipment where it’s out of the way. It would be perfect.”

“I’ll think about it.”

“That’s all I ask.”

She linked her arm through mine and together we headed back downstairs so that I could pick up the canvases I’d originally come for. When we set them down onto the counter, Penny smiled up at us.

“So, what did you think? Did you see the inside of the fridge? You could fit a body in there.”

“You should put that on the flyer.”

“I just might.”

I handed the keys back to her and waited while she rang up the purchase.

“Alright, Maggie, that’ll be $29.78”

Sliding my card over to her, I thought over what Vero had told me upstairs. The apartment was perfect, that much was true, but living downtown would cut back on the time I would get to see Max and the boys. Not to mention how hard it would be for Sidney to get in and out of the place without being stopped.

“Hey Penny?”

“Mhmm?”

“Keep a tight grip on those keys for me.”

She smiled and handed me back my credit card, as well as my bag of canvases. “You got it. And by the way, can you drop some more of your business cards off when you get the chance? We’re all out. You’re going like hot cakes.”

I thanked her and wrapped my coat a bit tighter around my frame. “I’ll drop some off by the end of the week.”

Vero and I headed back into the cold, turning back towards the direction we’d originally walked from, eager to find a place for a hot lunch. As we walked, I couldn’t get my mind off of the set of keys I knew was lying in Penny’s top drawer or the apartment I’d already begun to decorate in my head.

I would be back, and it would be mine.