I Must Be Blind, to Not Have Seen the Signs

I was sat with one of the guitar techs and max but I wasn’t really listening to what they were saying. I was watching Pip. She said something to Henry before walking over to Chris, and then matt and dan, before walking over to us.

I don’t know what I was feeling towards the girl, but whatever it was it seemed to be happening really fast. I admit that I liked her. More than I should? Probably yes. But I was hoping it would pass soon. Maybe it was because we’d just met and I thought she was pretty. I was hoping if I could get over that we could grow to be great friends.

“Hey boys I’m off now, just thought I’d say bye” she smiled, and I felt my heart sink into my stomach.

“Okay love, you’ll have to come hang out with us again soon yeah?” max said wrapping his arms around her.

“Well josh said to come to the gig next week and he has my number so I’ll be back, don’t you worry” she winked at him and turned to me. I jumped up off the amp I was sitting on and opened my arms out to her. She flung her arms around me, and I held her close. Her hair smelt faintly of vanilla and I just wanted to bury my face in it, but I figured that would be weird.

“Speak to you later yeah?” she asked as we pulled apart and I just nodded. “Later boys” she said, and with hat she walked off. Max and I watched as she walked over to Henry and then they left hand in hand.

“How the hell did Henry swing that one?” max asked.

“I have no idea mate”

“Lucky bugger” he snorted and then walked over to Chris to talk about some chord he’d forgotten.

Dan and I went back to the dressing room to play a bit of fifa to pass the time, and soon after the others came back too. My game was off, and all the lad’s were taking the piss. I had no idea why though, I just felt really distracted.

Dan won the game and whilst they were all celebrating I quickly excused myself, saying I had to make a call. I didn’t really, my head was just so messed up right now I needed somewhere quiet where I could think.

Unfortunately the only place where there weren’t any people was the bathroom. I went inside, sat on the sink and pulled out my phone. I checked a few things on there and suddenly, as if my mind had taken me there, I was on my phonebook over Pip’s number, my finger hovering over the call button.

Okay so maybe calling her was a step too far, I’d text her instead, just to make sure it was her number. Well that was the excuse anyway.

Just wanted to check this was actually you
And you didn’t give me a fake number
Josh x

I was hovering over the whole kiss thing but decided to put it on there anyway. Didn’t wanna seem rude eh? I put my phone down next to me and placed my head in my hands.

What are you doing josh, you need to man up a bit. She’s only a girl. Yes and attractive one, but still. You have loads of girls throw themselves at you everyday so why are you acting this way over one girl?

I was jolted from my thoughts by my phone going off. I looked to see there was a text from Pip and I got a few butterflies in my stomach. I swear I felt like such a pansy.

Now why would I do that?
Yes it’s me :)
Pip x

I tried to stop the smile that took over my face but couldn’t. I wanted to talk to her more but I didn’t want to annoy her. One more text I told myself.

Just checking!
Have a good rest of the day
I’ll text you about the show soon
Josh x

I felt like such a fool, so I hopped off from the sinks and went back into the dressing room; everyone had left now, apart from Chris, so I plonked myself down next to him on the sofa. I was about to say something when my phone went off again.

Thanks’, have a good show
Though judging from sound check I’m sure you’ll be fine
Pip x

“who you talking to?” chris suddenly asked, and when I looked up he was staring me down.

“just Pip, I wanted to make sure she gave me the right number” I defended myself. chris kept looking at me, like he was reading my mind, so I quickly put my defences up to keep him out. “what?” I asked him and she shrugged.

“nothing. But I know that look josh”

“what look?”

“I think you know what I’m talking about. She has a boyfriend josh, don’t mess things up yeah”

“Chris I have no idea what you’re talking about”

“I think you do” chris said standing up “you forget, I’ve know you for a long time, I can read you like a book” he said before leaving the room.

Was I really that transparent?