The Limey and the Yank!

“Tobias!! Wait for me, bro! Hold your horses, why are you walkin’ so fast?!” Mary ran after him, bumping into people who were headed the other direction.

Tobias looked behind him to find the American girl desperately reaching out to him, jammed between several bodies of equally annoyed Brits. Behind her was a rag-tag group of his friends, each desperate to reach the American first. Rolling his eyes, Tobias turned his back on the ludacrous scene.

“Tobi? TOBI?!!” He could hear Mary scream out to him, but he ignored her this time.

Suddenly, there was a large bang from behind him, making Tobias cringe in fear of what had just happened.

“Hiya, American mutt. Why not just fuck off, yeah? It’s obvious he thinks you’re a sket, yeah!” a snobby voice chuckled, followed by a cascade of equally snotty giggles. “Tobias is too brill for you, any who, so leave him be, munter!”

Tobias quickly turned back around, recognizing the voice, as everyone else stopped to watch the scene, cutting him off from what was happening.

“Come on ya slut, get up so you can get one of ya greasy hamburgers, blubber butt! Bet you want one of them right now, yeah?” the same voice mocked.

“Get up, fuckin’ skit!” another voice hissed threateningly as the crowd grew livelier.

Worried for the American, Tobias shoved himself closer to the rising argument.

“Well, get up manky Yankee! Aren’t you going to do anything to Brittany?” a different voice quickly followed up.

Pushing himself to the front, Tobias found Mary on the floor, her back to him, and at the mercy of three blond, British bullies. Tobias sighed, half angry that he’d have to protect her, half relieved that she was still okay. He should have told her to avoid these girls in the first place; he knew they were nothing but trouble. Though, if he had told her Mary probably would have gone looking for them herself. She’s just that incredibly nice, cheery, dense, and dumb like that. These girls would eat her alive.

Stepping into the human circle that was made around the girls, Tobias muttered, “Come now, ladies-”

“Chill your stringy, slutty thongs, jealous little skanks.” A sly, haughty tone slithered out from next to him.

A silent gasp echoed through the crowd as Tobias gasped at Mary who was still sitting on the ground. Her knees were propped up and she leaned an elbow on them, and that hand propped up her head, her fingers spread out against her smirking, devilish face.

The trio stared incredulously at her, surprised that she had said something so leisurely after such an attack.

“Wait! Lemmy get up…” she stretched her legs and stood as if she weren’t scared at all; as if she was getting up from a pic nick! “So I can see your sorry-ass faces when I’m through with you mingy-ass-hoes.” Mary purred out flawlessly and without sounding as brash and forceful as the trio.

Everyone continued to stare in surprise, not knowing how to react to her. It was like a completely different Mary; not cheery or nice anymore.

Tobias shook the shock from his head, finally regaining his posture as he reached for the American to try and pull her away.

“Lay off, bro.” she gently shoved his arm away from her, “I’m in the middle of something. Yeah?” She mocked, cocking a brow at the trio. Still, there was only silence. Mary smirked at the girls, knowing she had their attention. “Now, I have no idea who the hell you are, bitch, but it’s nice to have a hater around again. I should actually be thanking you right now because you probably know my name, my classes, and you’re probably going to be thinking about me all day long.” Mary sang out as she stepped closer Brittany, a devilish, winning smile painted on her face. “And there ain’t a thing you can do about it, skank. So you can love me all you want.”

“Love you?!” Brittany scoffed, not knowing what else to say.

Mary shrugged her shoulders at her as she lightly shook her head. “Love me. Hate me. It’s all the same thing in your case, darlin’. Now, I don’t want this little incident to happen again; do you see how much drama it caused?” she asked, pointing out towards the crowd and Tobias. “So here are some prerequisites before you decided you’re good enough to talk to me again, k? Out of the goodness of my heart~!” Mary smiled sweetly, placing her hands on her chest. “1) Learn to act like an adult, 2) Stop being an arrogant, psycho bitch because Tobias is single and doesn’t deserve needy trash like you hanging around him, and 3) Lose ten pounds off that pouch of yours.” Mary chuckled, eyeing Brittany’s gut.

The crowd burst up into oo’s and awe’s like a swarm of apes, and Tobias’s jaw hit the floor. Did Mary just tell off the head of the meanest girl in school? Are those girls turning on their heels and running off, stuck on what to say back? Is Mary turning back to him and handing him a smiling hand of triumph to shut his dangling lower jaw? And is she really getting scolded and dragged away by the principal who saw the whole display?

Tobias dropped his head in shame as his friends crowded around him to weep about her getting caught.

“Idiots. I’m surrounded by idiots…” Tobias wept to himself.