Somebody That I Used to Know

Over the next few days, Ronnie had not invited the guys over and he was doing everything in his power to not let me out of his sight. I sat in our living room watching TV Saturday morning when Ronnie came down the stairs.

“Good morning, beautiful.” he began before walking over to the couch and placing a quick kiss on my cheek, “How are you feeling? I heard you throwing up this morning.”

“I felt like I had an alien making a nest in my stomach so he can invite his friends, I’m better now though. I’m just really hungry.” I said as I leaned my head on his shoulder.

Ronnie chuckled before he stood up and walked over to the kitchen. I heard him rummaging through the pots and pans and I stood up, walking over to the kitchen.

“Are you going to cook for me, fiancé?” I asked playfully, pulling myself up to sit on top of the counter only to fail miserably.

I pouted and opted out, sitting on one of the stools by the island instead.

“Are you sure you’re okay? You never sit on the actual chairs like a person, you always sit up here and make fun of my horrible cooking skills.” Ronnie said, pulling food out of the fridge to make me French toast.

“Yeah, I probably just gained some weight. I need to go on a diet or something.” I said as I chipped the silver nail polish off of my fingers.

“You, on a diet, you barely eat anything as it is.” Ronnie said in a worried tone.

I stood up from the stool and walked back over to the counter, attempting to use my thin arms to pull me up. Ronnie walked over to me and easily lifted me up and placed me on top of the counter, my legs dangling off the side. I used one of the hair ties around Ronnie’s wrist to tighten my loose tank top. I ran my hands along my stomach and sighed.

“Ronnie, I think I have an alien in there for real. Look, I gained so much weight.” I said with a whine.

Ronnie chuckled as he turned on the coffee pot.

“You are not putting on weight, Ana. Isn’t it a bit too early for you to be having a mid-life crisis?” he asked as he put something in a frying pan.

“I’m not experiencing a mid-life crisis, Ronald! And I’m not imagining things, I just…” as I searched for the right words, the smell of whatever he was cooking reached me and made me three times hungrier, “Ronnie, what are you cooking? It smells like happiness, sunshine, and rainbows!”

Ronnie turned to look at me, his face thoroughly confused.

“I’m making bacon, you’re a vegetarian and always yell at me because you don’t like the smell of bacon.” he said as he slowly stepped closer to me.

“Oh, I guess I’m just hungrier than I thought.” I said.

“Ana,” Ronnie began as he picked up the coffee pot, “smell this.”

I raised an eyebrow before I shrugged and leaned closer to him to smell the coffee pot. I flinched back after I did and placed my hand over my mouth before sliding myself off of the counter and running to the nearest bathroom. I got on my knees in front of the toilet bowl before throwing up the small amount of contents that were in my stomach. When I was sure I was done, I flushed the toilet bowl and stood up to brush my teeth. Ronnie walked into the bathroom and leaned against the doorframe when I was rinsing my mouth with mouthwash.

“Get dressed.” Ronnie said in a voice that sounded like he was about to cry.

“Ronnie, I don’t need to go to the doctor. It’s probably just a stomach virus or something, it’ll pass on its own.” I said.

“We’re not going to the doctor. We’re going to the pharmacy.” he said as he walked into my room and rummaged through my drawers to get me something to wear.

“Ronnie, I don’t need medicine. I’m probably not even sick and it’s just my nerves.” I said as he threw my favorite hoodie and jeans at me.

“You’re right, you’re not sick…you’re pregnant.” he said as he sat down on my bed, placing his head in his hands and sighing.

“I’m not pregnant, Ronnie. I don’t know where you think babies come from but I’ve never had sex, ergo no baby.” I said, getting dressed and doing my makeup anyway to make him happy and avoid an argument.

“Ana,” Ronnie began slowly as he stood up and walked over to me, placing his hands on my shoulders, “When Harper raped you, did they give you a pregnancy test?”

My eyes widened as I shook my head.

“They told me to drink some morning after pills but I refused because, well, you remember when I was little and I choked on the pills my mom gave me.”

“Let’s just go get a test.” he said as he ran a hand through his hair.

I nodded my head and followed him downstairs. We went to the nearest pharmacy and Ronnie walked in ahead of me, he held my hand and walked to the back of the store where the pregnancy tests were and I felt my face get hot and I pulled my hood over my hair.

“I don’t know which ones to get.” Ronnie mumbled.

“And you think I do, I know less about any of this than you do. Just grab something so we can go home.” I said.

Ronnie grabbed a box and flipped it over to read the back and see if he could understand what to do.

“What am I going to do if I’m pregnant?” I asked as I wrapped my arms around my middle.

Ronnie turned around with a box in each hand and his expression had noticeably softened at the sound of my voice. He stepped closer to me and wrapped me up in his warm arms and I felt my muscles relax with his touch.

“It’s not what you’re going to do, it’s what we’re going to do. If you are pregnant, I’m going to stay with you every step of the way.” he said kindly, earning the attention of a few passing women that were aweing at his words.

I smiled and pulled away from him, happily accepting the kiss that he placed on my lips. Ronnie and I walked to the cashier and he paid for the two pregnancy tests before we got in my car and he rushed us home. He handed me the two boxes when we walked in his bedroom and I looked at him, biting my lip.

“Do you really think I should do this, what if I really am pregnant?” I said.

“Just do it, Annie. Maybe we’re worrying about nothing.” he said.

I nodded my head and walked into the bathroom, deciding that I might as well do all of the tests in case one of them wasn’t accurate. Five minutes later, when I finished peeing on the sticks and was sitting on the floor by one of the two sinks, Ronnie walked into the bathroom and sat in front of me.

“Is it almost time to check them yet?” he asked me.

“The time to check them passed, I was just too scared to see what they said.” I said with a chuckle.

Ronnie stood up and looked at the four tests I had laid out on top of one of the sinks. Ronnie sighed before looking down at me with a few unshed tears in his eyes.

“Please tell me you’re crying out of happiness.” I said as I pulled my knees closer to me and wrapped my arms around them.

Ronnie shook his head and I felt tears fall from my green eyes as I hid my face in my knees. I felt Ronnie’s presence next to me as my tears continued to fall.

“What am I going to tell my kid when it asks about his father, that he’s a fucking rapist?! What am I going to do? I can barely take care of myself, how am I going to take care of a baby?” I cried out.

I felt Ronnie pull me onto his lap and wrapped his arms around me and moved me around so that my green tear-filled eyes could mix with his piercing brown eyes.

“Ana, I love you more than anything. I’m not going to let you go through this alone, I’ll help you in any way that I can.” he said as he wiped my mascara-filled tears away.

“But Ronnie-” I began, only to be cut off by Ronnie.

“No buts, Ana,” he began, “I love you.”

“I love you too, Ronnie. But this isn’t about us, this is about-”

“No, you don’t understand, I love you. I’ve always loved you; I’ve just been too much of a pussy to say anything.”

My mouth hung open and I remained speechless. Ronnie leaned in and kissed me, not the sweet pecks we usually give each other, he actually kissed me with more passion and love than what I’ve ever experienced. When he pulled away, I was still speechless.

“I know you might say no or you might not approve, but, I want to be this baby’s father. I want to be with you, and I want you to be with me.” he said.

I moved closer to Ronnie and kissed him roughly, letting the past twenty years of tension between the two of us flow out in one shot. When we pulled away, I nodded my head.

“I love you, Ronnie, and I wouldn’t want anybody else to be the father of my baby.” I said to him.

Ronnie leaned into me and kissed me again.