I'm Beating Myself Up Over This
Chapter 5
Today we leave for tour. I woke up at 5am working off of three hours of sleep. I made Oli and Tom put their bags in the living room yesterday before we left for my party. I took mine down with theirs, so when the bus driver got there he can put them right in. I went out to Tom’s car and got my presents from last night, quickly packing the ones I wanted to bring and running the rest upstairs. I grabbed a yogurt and quickly ate it as I double checked our stuff to make sure everything was there.
Perfect.
I looked at the time, 5:34am. Okay, the bus will be here at 6am. I went upstairs to Oli’s room first. He was sprawled across the bed in jujst his boxers. I had to laugh. I went over to him and shook him awake.
“Oli, come on. The bus will be here in twenty minutes. Get up.”
He groaned and lazily got up. He gave me a small smile signaling to me that he would be ready in twenty or less.
Now, time for Tom.
This was going to be a little harder.
He wasn’t exactly difficult to wake up, but he was like a zombie for a good ten minutes after waking up.
Not only that, he was so God damn cute when he was sleeping, I almost couldn’t bare to wake him.
I crept into his room without making a sound. 5:40. I walked over to him and bent over him, lightly shaking him.
“Tom” I whispered.
“Teddy, wake up.” I said a little louder.
I was suddenly pulled down into the bed into the arms of the boy who I’ve secretly loved since forever.
“Tommy, wake up. The bus will be here in about twenty minutes.”
He groaned and pulled me closer.
“Thomas Jordan Sykes. Get up now.” I said in the sternest voice I could muster, considering it was taking everything I could not to kiss him.
He groaned and let me go, wiping the sleep from his eyes. I had to help him get out of bed. He’s seriously a zombie. I had to guide him to the bathroom so he could wash his face to wake up.
Once he was in the bathroom I ran downstairs to see if the bus was here. The driver liked to get here a little early to get everything loaded so we could leave a little ahead of time.
I don’t even know we had a bus. We had one show in England, then two days off to go to Australia. Afterwards we were traveling around Europe, back to England for a couple shows, then warped tour. Then they were off to work on the new record some more. I guess the bus was for convenience.
Once at the bottom of the steps, I saw the clock said 5:55am. Perfect. The bus was right outside and the driver was waiting to be let in to load everything up. I opened the door, and grabbed my bags. I threw what I knew I wasn’t going to need into the space for luggage. Then I ran back inside to get my laptop, camera, purse, and backpack with a change of clothes, some body prays, my makeup.
I sat down at the little table in the mini kitchen and opened my laptop. I logged in and opened up the internet. I signed into my Myspace page to see I already had about twenty messages.
Jesus. Just cause I know the guys I get tons of messages a day from random fans wanting to know anything and everything about them.
Or I just get a message saying they saw me at this show or that party.
I looked up as I heard someone climb onto the steps. Oli. He smiles and goes back to the beds. Not surprised.
Tom climbs on just as I look back down. I’m talking to SJ on AIM. How the hell she’s up this early I’ll never know.
‘So when are you planning on telling him?’ she asked.
‘Jesus Christ, woman, give me some time. I have till August don’t I?’ I replied.
‘Yeah, yeah, but you know the deal. You tell him, or I do.’
“Tell who what?” Tom asked as I almost literally jumped out of my seat. Luckily he could only see the last line.
“No one. Nothing.” I said really quickly.
“Come on Lovie, don’t lie to me” he said. He started calling me Lovie one night during our last year of high school. He was drunk, I was almost drunk, and it kind of stuck. It makes my heart leap every time he calls me that.
“The boy I was talking to you about. I told SJ I’d tell him soon or she can, cause she’s up my arse about it.” I said with a sigh as I looked up at him.
Did his face just fall? Was that hurt I saw in his eyes?
I must be going insane.
“So why not tell him?” he asked.
Was that pain in his voice?
“It’s weird. I’ve never felt this way before. I think I actually love him.” I replied.
There was defiantly pain in his eyes.
What the fuck?
The next thing I knew, Curtis was walking on the bus. I didn’t even realize the bus was moving. He looked like a god damn zombie. He just waved and walked to the bunks. Good thing the sound check was at 3pm, and the show was at 7pm. And since it wasn’t even 6:15am, they had plenty of time to sleep.
I closed my laptop and put it away.
“I’m going to sleep.” I said standing up, with Tom following suit.
“Me too. Mind if we share a bunk?” he asked, looking a little nervous.
This was new, and kind of weird.
But a good weird.
I just smiled and grabbed his wrist.
Perfect.
I looked at the time, 5:34am. Okay, the bus will be here at 6am. I went upstairs to Oli’s room first. He was sprawled across the bed in jujst his boxers. I had to laugh. I went over to him and shook him awake.
“Oli, come on. The bus will be here in twenty minutes. Get up.”
He groaned and lazily got up. He gave me a small smile signaling to me that he would be ready in twenty or less.
Now, time for Tom.
This was going to be a little harder.
He wasn’t exactly difficult to wake up, but he was like a zombie for a good ten minutes after waking up.
Not only that, he was so God damn cute when he was sleeping, I almost couldn’t bare to wake him.
I crept into his room without making a sound. 5:40. I walked over to him and bent over him, lightly shaking him.
“Tom” I whispered.
“Teddy, wake up.” I said a little louder.
I was suddenly pulled down into the bed into the arms of the boy who I’ve secretly loved since forever.
“Tommy, wake up. The bus will be here in about twenty minutes.”
He groaned and pulled me closer.
“Thomas Jordan Sykes. Get up now.” I said in the sternest voice I could muster, considering it was taking everything I could not to kiss him.
He groaned and let me go, wiping the sleep from his eyes. I had to help him get out of bed. He’s seriously a zombie. I had to guide him to the bathroom so he could wash his face to wake up.
Once he was in the bathroom I ran downstairs to see if the bus was here. The driver liked to get here a little early to get everything loaded so we could leave a little ahead of time.
I don’t even know we had a bus. We had one show in England, then two days off to go to Australia. Afterwards we were traveling around Europe, back to England for a couple shows, then warped tour. Then they were off to work on the new record some more. I guess the bus was for convenience.
Once at the bottom of the steps, I saw the clock said 5:55am. Perfect. The bus was right outside and the driver was waiting to be let in to load everything up. I opened the door, and grabbed my bags. I threw what I knew I wasn’t going to need into the space for luggage. Then I ran back inside to get my laptop, camera, purse, and backpack with a change of clothes, some body prays, my makeup.
I sat down at the little table in the mini kitchen and opened my laptop. I logged in and opened up the internet. I signed into my Myspace page to see I already had about twenty messages.
Jesus. Just cause I know the guys I get tons of messages a day from random fans wanting to know anything and everything about them.
Or I just get a message saying they saw me at this show or that party.
I looked up as I heard someone climb onto the steps. Oli. He smiles and goes back to the beds. Not surprised.
Tom climbs on just as I look back down. I’m talking to SJ on AIM. How the hell she’s up this early I’ll never know.
‘So when are you planning on telling him?’ she asked.
‘Jesus Christ, woman, give me some time. I have till August don’t I?’ I replied.
‘Yeah, yeah, but you know the deal. You tell him, or I do.’
“Tell who what?” Tom asked as I almost literally jumped out of my seat. Luckily he could only see the last line.
“No one. Nothing.” I said really quickly.
“Come on Lovie, don’t lie to me” he said. He started calling me Lovie one night during our last year of high school. He was drunk, I was almost drunk, and it kind of stuck. It makes my heart leap every time he calls me that.
“The boy I was talking to you about. I told SJ I’d tell him soon or she can, cause she’s up my arse about it.” I said with a sigh as I looked up at him.
Did his face just fall? Was that hurt I saw in his eyes?
I must be going insane.
“So why not tell him?” he asked.
Was that pain in his voice?
“It’s weird. I’ve never felt this way before. I think I actually love him.” I replied.
There was defiantly pain in his eyes.
What the fuck?
The next thing I knew, Curtis was walking on the bus. I didn’t even realize the bus was moving. He looked like a god damn zombie. He just waved and walked to the bunks. Good thing the sound check was at 3pm, and the show was at 7pm. And since it wasn’t even 6:15am, they had plenty of time to sleep.
I closed my laptop and put it away.
“I’m going to sleep.” I said standing up, with Tom following suit.
“Me too. Mind if we share a bunk?” he asked, looking a little nervous.
This was new, and kind of weird.
But a good weird.
I just smiled and grabbed his wrist.
♠ ♠ ♠
feedback?if you subcribed let me knowww. i'd love to know who likes it that much =]
thinking of adding a new character. anyone interested?