Bat Country

Alexis had bathed and changed clothes before leaving the nest. Morale was way down, and Alexis had nothing positive to add. Things were going to shit pretty fast, she thought, and not wanting to be around it, she had ran for 2 hours before she settled on this spot as a suitable place to stop. It was densely populated with plants so Alexis could nestle in them. She had her back up against a fallen tree, and her arms were crossed and she had her legs crossed as well, parallel with the ground. Matt’s body was like a nightmare, and Alexis didn’t want to think about it. Instead she focused on the other original vampire she met. The one that ended the life of Valary, the elf. He was almost effeminate in his features, but he still remained surprisingly masculine. No one else had seemed to even notice him, much less seem to know who it was. What did he mean when she was ready? As Alexis poured through her thoughts, she didn’t notice that someone was close. The flowering plants swayed gently in an almost non existent breeze and their perfume danced gracefully around Alexis.
Her eyes shot up when a stick broke. She prepared to get up, but when she turned her head, it was only Brian.
“Oh. It’s just you.” She said, nestling back into the exact same position she was in before.
“It’s just me.” He repeated. He looked over at Alexis and scanned her body. She was kind of distant, her eyes lost in some sort of confusion. “Mind if I sit with you?” the words were gentle and inoffensive.
Alexis looked over at him from the corner of her eyes, her arms crossed back over her chest. “Suit yourself.” She shrugged lightly.
Settling on the ground next to Alexis, Brian put his legs up and rested his elbows on them. There was a moment of silence before Brian looked over at Alexis. “You gonna be alright?”
Alexis’s eyes opened a bit and she turned to look at Brian with her eyebrows raised. She tilted her head to the side and then let it fall back some.
“Is what’s been happening…normal…?” She looked back at him.
His eyes stared off into some unnoticed portion of the woods and focused there. He pursed his small lips then brought his eyebrows together and looked at Alexis.
“That depends on what you consider normal.” He said bluntly.
When Alexis looked unimpressed, he studied her face. She was very feline, and it was apt given how predatory she could be. Her oval face and pointed features made gave her a viperous appeal. Unfortunately, Brian now noticed a familiar unhappiness as she looked away.
“Tell me what‘s up.” He said, his legs sliding down against the dirt.
Alexis fell kind of slack, her arms unblocking her chest. “I’m tired, Brian. I didn’t have a chance to get used to what I was and…” she trailed off, looking back at Brian. The planes of his face showed his attentiveness. He was actively listening.
“And I was starved and attacked by the fucking people who are supposed to take care of me.” Her face fell flat and she looked away once more. “Thor tried to make me his weapon when I didn’t even want to be a weapon at all. Elves eviscerated Matt and nearly killed everyone I rely on. ELVES, Brian!” Her eyes met Brian’s yet again and behind his dark eyes, there was something. A hidden emotion Alexis could only guess was sympathy. She continued. “It just seems like everything is happening all at once. At first I was excited.” She smiled, but then it faded as her arms crossed again. “Now I’m fucking terrified of what’s going to happen next, and I don’t like that. I don’t like that Matt is my ‘mate’,” her hands gestured quotations as she said the word. “I don’t even get to decide who I get to love for all fucking eternity? It‘s decided for me?” Her eyes searched Brian’s for an answer that she knew she wouldn’t give. She hoped he’d say it wasn’t like that, that she simply misunderstood, but that wasn’t the case. “Even animals get to choose.” she said sadly, turning away from him. Her hair was so dark that it stood in contrast to her luminescent skin in the soft glow of the waning moon.
Moments of silence passed, with the only sound being Alexis crunching the dead leaves in her hands.
“I wish I had something to say that would make anything better for you. But I don’t.”
Alexis sighed and her arms fell. “Of course not. Look, Brian--”
“Let me finish.” He cut her off. “Nothing will make this better for you. If it sucks, it sucks. If shit sucks for you, your options are to run away and find something new, or actually die. I’ve hated myself for a long fucking time, Alexis. I’ve tried to do both and neither involves having a good time.”
Alexis looked down. “Yeah Callie didn’t seem to have a good time.”
Brian’s shoulders dropped. “Do you honestly blame yourself for that?”
Alexis looked up at him, almost disgusted. “Of course I do! I fucking killed her!”
Brian showed no sign of contempt. “Zacky doesn’t even blame you himself, so stop feeling fucking sorry for yourself because you killed one stupid bitch who provoked you.”
Alexis sighed and put her head back. “I wish I was human.”
“No you don’t.” Brian rebutted. “You get sick, you get old, you die. You rush through life struggling to find meaning for a trivial existence. Some turn to God to help give their life a purpose. Some people turn to themselves, or each other. But all of it is equally pointless.” it was his turn to cross his arms and he folded them delicately over his chest with his eyebrows furrowed together. “I thought the same thing. That I wanted to be human, for a long time, that’s what I wanted. Honestly, I just didn’t want to kill anybody. Taking away life is something shitty to live with forever, you know what I’m saying?”
Truth was, Alexis didn’t. Killing was a grotesque thought, but Alexis could do it with little problem. She lied with a nod.
“My flaw is my self control. Matt, everyone else, can leave their victims living. I can’t. I’ve tried and the anxiety makes shit worse and they die anyways. So I hated myself for having to kill them. Even worse is everyone feeds me the same horse shit about how I can do it if I really wanted to. Like hating myself til I want to die doesn’t count as really wanting to.”
The two sat in the warm forest, sharing a moment of silence. A slight wind rustled through the leaves, but it was a still night.
Brian‘s eyes widened when he felt something on his hand. Looking down he saw that Alexis‘s fingers had wrapped around his hand and were holding it gently.
“I don’t think I could stop either.”