The Death Process
Numb
Today was my first day back at school after the crash. To be completely honest, I was a total mess. I hadn’t done anything except cry and stare emotionless as my mom tried to comfort me. I had been away from everyone except for mom for two days. Today was the day Gerard and I were supposed to go to the movies. But now we couldn’t. We could never do anything, ever again.
I hadn’t even eaten more than two full meals the entire time. Both of them were when my mom shoved vegetarian lasagna down my throat against my will.
I arrived at school with my messy hair and miss matched clothing. I had forgotten most of my school supplies. Life wasn’t worth it anymore. As I was walking many people came up to me and apologized for the crash. I didn’t know why though, they hadn’t driving the car. The boy that was driving the car was sent to jail for driving under the influence and manslaughter. One of the worst parts about Gee’s death was that he hadn’t touched alcohol in years.
I was near the library now and could see a boy sitting down at a bench crying. I walked closer and saw that it was Mikey Way, Gerard’s younger brother. I nearly ran up to him and sat next to him. He looked up at me with his glasses fogged up and tears rolling down his cheeks. “H-hey Frankie.” Mikey tried to smile but failed miserably.
“Hey Mikes. Are you upset for the same reason I am?”
“You go-got it. I miss hi-him.” Mikey hiccupped a couple times before I put my arm around his shoulders. I pulled him close to me and let him cry into my neck. I was tempted to break down with him, but I had to be strong for Gee’s brother. He would have wanted it to be like that.
The first period bell rang and Mikey got up. “I’ll see you, Frankie.” I was going to protest, but skipping would make matters worse. I sighed before getting up, wiping the tears off my neck, and slowly trudging to math.
When I walked inside I was already three minutes late. My teacher and the entire class turned to me once I opened the door. Mr. Carter walked up to me with a sympathetic look on his face. “Frank, I am so sorry for the loss of Gerard. We all are,” with that he shooed me to my seat in the back. As math continued I couldn’t help but write Gerard’s name all over my paper that was supposed to hold notes.
The bell rang for second period and I closed my notebook and walked to Gym. The exact thing happened where I would arrive late, no one cared, and everyone would apologize for something that they could care less about. Even the jocks acted sad and they had made Gee’s life a living Hell. As we began to run our daily run I couldn’t help but think about my favorite memory of Gee and I on this track.
It had been last year when I was a freshman and he had been a junior. We had to run in the heat, so Gee chased me and I got an A. We had been laughing and whenever he would catch up with me he would tickle me and kiss me. A lot of people would run by us completely disgusted, but we hadn’t cared. We were in love.
Now I was running this track with no one by my side. I had no boyfriend cheering me on. I didn’t even know anyone well in this class. I even hated some of them. When Gym ended it was time for brunch. I met with Ray, Bob, and Mikey. Bob and Ray didn’t say anything and Mikey broke down again, this time crying into Bob’s chest.
Ray moved closer to me and began to talk. “Man, I feel so bad for Mikey. He and Gerard were like best friends. Of course Gee annoyed Mikey and vise versa, but they really did love each other. I hate to see him this upset.”
I nodded in response, afraid that if I were to open my mouth then I would too start to sob. “We both miss him.” I squeaked out. My eyes burned from holding back tears and my throat was raw. I couldn’t take it anymore. I took out my phone and texted my mom. I told her that I wanted to come home and that I was about to lose it.
A few minutes before lunch was going to end I was called to the office. Mom was waiting for me and when she saw how much pain I was in she rushed to me and gave me a death hug.
I let her squeeze me because I just didn’t really care. My soul was numb.
I hadn’t even eaten more than two full meals the entire time. Both of them were when my mom shoved vegetarian lasagna down my throat against my will.
I arrived at school with my messy hair and miss matched clothing. I had forgotten most of my school supplies. Life wasn’t worth it anymore. As I was walking many people came up to me and apologized for the crash. I didn’t know why though, they hadn’t driving the car. The boy that was driving the car was sent to jail for driving under the influence and manslaughter. One of the worst parts about Gee’s death was that he hadn’t touched alcohol in years.
I was near the library now and could see a boy sitting down at a bench crying. I walked closer and saw that it was Mikey Way, Gerard’s younger brother. I nearly ran up to him and sat next to him. He looked up at me with his glasses fogged up and tears rolling down his cheeks. “H-hey Frankie.” Mikey tried to smile but failed miserably.
“Hey Mikes. Are you upset for the same reason I am?”
“You go-got it. I miss hi-him.” Mikey hiccupped a couple times before I put my arm around his shoulders. I pulled him close to me and let him cry into my neck. I was tempted to break down with him, but I had to be strong for Gee’s brother. He would have wanted it to be like that.
The first period bell rang and Mikey got up. “I’ll see you, Frankie.” I was going to protest, but skipping would make matters worse. I sighed before getting up, wiping the tears off my neck, and slowly trudging to math.
When I walked inside I was already three minutes late. My teacher and the entire class turned to me once I opened the door. Mr. Carter walked up to me with a sympathetic look on his face. “Frank, I am so sorry for the loss of Gerard. We all are,” with that he shooed me to my seat in the back. As math continued I couldn’t help but write Gerard’s name all over my paper that was supposed to hold notes.
The bell rang for second period and I closed my notebook and walked to Gym. The exact thing happened where I would arrive late, no one cared, and everyone would apologize for something that they could care less about. Even the jocks acted sad and they had made Gee’s life a living Hell. As we began to run our daily run I couldn’t help but think about my favorite memory of Gee and I on this track.
It had been last year when I was a freshman and he had been a junior. We had to run in the heat, so Gee chased me and I got an A. We had been laughing and whenever he would catch up with me he would tickle me and kiss me. A lot of people would run by us completely disgusted, but we hadn’t cared. We were in love.
Now I was running this track with no one by my side. I had no boyfriend cheering me on. I didn’t even know anyone well in this class. I even hated some of them. When Gym ended it was time for brunch. I met with Ray, Bob, and Mikey. Bob and Ray didn’t say anything and Mikey broke down again, this time crying into Bob’s chest.
Ray moved closer to me and began to talk. “Man, I feel so bad for Mikey. He and Gerard were like best friends. Of course Gee annoyed Mikey and vise versa, but they really did love each other. I hate to see him this upset.”
I nodded in response, afraid that if I were to open my mouth then I would too start to sob. “We both miss him.” I squeaked out. My eyes burned from holding back tears and my throat was raw. I couldn’t take it anymore. I took out my phone and texted my mom. I told her that I wanted to come home and that I was about to lose it.
A few minutes before lunch was going to end I was called to the office. Mom was waiting for me and when she saw how much pain I was in she rushed to me and gave me a death hug.
I let her squeeze me because I just didn’t really care. My soul was numb.
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Yeah a chapter! I am so sorry I haven't updated in like 3 months, but I wasn't really feeling the story. I finally kicked myself in the ass and said, "Shayna (me) you WILL right more!" So here you go! Also, I will be making a new story that consists of frerard one-shots that are titled after all the MCR songs from Bullets, Revenge, Parade, and Danger Days. Each chapter is inspired by the song. I take the lyrics and interpret them into a one-shot frerard. Feel free to check it out when I put it up.