Not Over You

Samantha sighed impatiently as she waited for Grant to pick up his phone. She looked out the window of her half empty apartment and just gazed down at the city. After the sixth ring, she gave up and hung up her phone. She wiped her light red nose with the tissue she had in her hand as she felt lonely and frustrated. She took the day off from work but was now regretting her decision since she had nothing else to do.

Having no one else for her in the city, she called the one person she could count on. She knew that it was probably a bad idea but she didn’t care. Grant was supposed to be there for her but he was too busy with work to even talk to her for a few minutes on the phone.

“Hello?” Jon answered.

“Jon? Hi, it’s me,” she smiled lightly.

He paused, “Sam? Are you crying?” He asked, noticing how she sounded different than she normally did. “Is everything alright?”

She laughed slightly, feeling embarrassed that she was even turning to him for comfort. “Not really. Elena and Burish left this morning,” she immediately frowned, “I don’t know what to do.”

“Aw, Sam,” Jon couldn’t help but snicker. “You shouldn’t be so upset. You know Elena is happy and can handle herself. If it’ll make you feel better she’s probably just as miserable as you are.”

“It does help a little,” she laughed along with him. “I’m sorry for calling you…I didn’t know who else to call.”

“No, I’m glad you called. Did you maybe want to grab something to eat? I’m sure you don’t feel like being alone right now.” Jon said, making her heart flutter. Even though they weren’t together, he still knew how to make her feel better.

She wiped her eyes as she felt a smile appear on her face. “Yeah, I’d like that.”

She and Jon agreed to meet at one of their favorite diner’s. She hastily went to the bathroom to make herself more presentable. Her eyes were blood shot red while her eye makeup was ruined from crying. After she was all cleaned up, she quickly put on her mascara before grabbing her clutch and walking out the door. She was a bit low on cash, so she decided to walk instead. The fresh air would do her some good.

She was just glad the diner wasn’t too far away. She could get there in roughly ten minutes just from walking. She knew Jon didn’t live as close to the diner as she did, so she decided to sit on a nearby bench to wait for him. Another fifteen minutes later she saw Jon’s car pull into the parking lot. She stood up as she walked over, wearing his sunglasses and hat to try and disguise himself.

She smiled sheepishly up at him. “Hi Jon.”

Jon gave her a toothy grin as his big arms wrapped around her body. “Hey, you look great.”

“Oh shut up,” she said, rolling her eyes as she shoved his shoulder as hard as she could.

“Jeez, I was just trying to give you a compliment,” Jon said as he opened the door for her. “Remind me to not be nice to you anymore.”

Suddenly feeling guilty for calling him, she looked up at him with a softer expression. “Thanks again for coming out. I’m sure I’m the last person you want to see right now.”

“You’re definitely not the last person I don’t want to see,” he reassuringly stated as they were seated. “I’m just glad you called me. How are you feeling?”

She gave him a little shrug as their waitress took their order. She waited for the waitress to leave before she continued their conversation. “This morning was really hard and we were both crying. But I know she’ll be happy with him down there.”

“Is it just me or is it weird how they hooked up?” Jon asked, making her smile.

“I thought I was the only one who thought that! I still don’t even know how it all happened in the first place!” She exclaimed, earning a laugh from Jon. “I mean how long have they been actually dating? They’re already moving in together in another state!”

“You know, I would expect this from Burish, but not Elena,” Jon said, playing this the piece of napkin he tore off. “But I guess when you find someone you really care about, anything you do for them doesn’t seem that crazy.”

She gave him a soft smile as their drinks arrived. Jon thanked the waitress before she walked off again, leaving Jon and Samantha alone. She didn’t know how to describe her relationship with Jon. Yes, they were exes, but she felt like there was still something going on between them. She still felt things for Jon in ways she didn’t feel for Grant.

“I need to tell you something,” Jon began. “I’m uh, leaving for Winnipeg next week to see my family.”

“Oh that’s good. You can show off your little trophy to all the girls,” she snorted. “How long are you going to be gone?”

Jon licked his thin lips lightly as he avoided eye contact with her. He didn’t know why he was so afraid to tell her. Deep down, he knew that she didn’t have anyone else to lean on and he felt like he was abandoning her.

“Roughly a month. I’m coming back in August,” he explained. Her posture slumped back into her chair with a frown forming on her lips. “You know, you can come if you want. I always said I would take you out of the country.”

“I actually wish I could, but I can’t. I still have to run the bakery and I don’t think Grant would be too happy about it. But thanks for the offer, I really appreciate it.” She smiled, trying to give him some assurance that she would be okay.

“I forgot about Grant,” Jon said, hiding his disappointed tone. “How are you guys anyway?”

“He’s been really busy this week doing some NBA commercial so I haven’t seen much of him lately,” she shrugged. “Have you been seeing anyone lately?”

Jon nervously rubbed the back of his neck, feeling awkward about talking about his love life to one of his ex’s. She wasn’t just his ex though; she was his ex that started off as a one night stand and the ex who he still had contact with.

“I’m not going to judge you, if that’s what you’re thinking. I mean, you already know about Grant.” She said, trying to ease him.

Jon laughed nervously. “I um, hooked up with this one girl but it was nothing.”

“What’s so funny about that?” She asked, wondering why he had laughed. She didn’t understand what was so funny.

“Nothing, it’s just that I haven’t actually dated anyone since you,” he explained. “I don’t even know how Sharp has the time for Abby and Lizzie.”

“They love each other. They’re willing to do anything to make it work,” she shrugged.

Jon tapped his fingers on the table as he watched Samantha’s actions from the corner of his eye. “Can I admit something to you?”

Samantha looked up at him and gave him a blank stare. She was nervous and wasn’t sure if she really wanted to hear what he had to say. “Yeah, I guess so.”

“I really regret how our breakup went,” he said lowly. “I felt like a douchebag trying to make the break up easier by trying to give you a gift and I was hoping you would put up more of a fight.”

She humorlessly chuckled at what he had just told her. “I actually cried myself to sleep that night.”

“It didn’t seem like you cared,” he shamefully admitted.

She exhaled, stirring her drink with her straw. “What was I supposed to do, Jon? I was getting in the way of your career, and look at you now. You won the cup. I wasn’t going to make you choose between me and something you love.”

“Who says I didn’t love you?” He questioned, feeling hurt what she thought he didn’t even care about her. Her eyes shot open as she looked up at him. She was confused and didn’t know what to do or say next. “Look, I know it was my fault and I’m sorry for opening old wounds, but it’s been bothering me a lot lately.”

“God, I wish you never said anything,” she groaned, pushing her hair back. “I’m sorry that I didn’t put up a fight but it’s not like I had a choice. It seemed like you already made up your mind. If it’ll make you feel better, I was crushed when you decided to break up with me. I was really starting to fall for you.”

Jon had the same shocked expression on his face like she had earlier. “Really?”

“Yeah, I was,” she gave him a shy smile. “I know this is such a girl thing for me to say, but when I was with you I felt like a better person. I felt like I didn’t hate everything as much as I used to.”

He was about to say something, but was interrupted once again by their waitress. She bought them their food and Jon hoped she wouldn’t stop by until they were done their food. Jon nibbled on one of is fries as she slowly ate her food.

“Does Grant make you feel like I did?”

Samantha looked over and Jon and shook her head. “He’s good and all, but I feel like our relationship is too grown up for my taste. Even with your away games, it seems like I saw you more than I see him.”

Jon was a little speechless. He was sure that she was too. They sat there awkwardly and ate their food in silence. When she had tried stealing one of his fries, he playfully smacked her hand, making her laugh. Soon enough the uncomfortable silence was broken and were finally enjoying each other’s company.



Samantha sat on her couch as her feet were propped up on the coffee table. Next to her was a bowl of kettle popcorn, which she would munch on time to time. Her laptop was resting on her lap as she was staring at Elena while they Skype.

“So let me get this straight, instead of being with Grant, who is your current boyfriend, you instead went to lunch with your ex, who ended up inviting you to Winnipeg?”

Samantha nodded. “Basically that’s what happened.”

Elena scoffed as she had a very confused expression on her face. “What the hell, Jon?” She cursed lowly. “I’m barley gone a full week and all this happens! What did you tell him after he asked you?”

“I told him I couldn’t,” Samantha said, biting the inside of her lip. She tried watching Elena’s expression to see if she had made the right decision. “I have the bakery to run and Grant wouldn’t be so happy that I would be with Jon for a whole month.”

Elena let out a low chuckle. “This is crazy. This would only happen to you.”

Both girls that there in silence as they tried to think of something else to say. Samantha let out an exasperated sigh before adjusting her laptop screen. “Do you think I’m making a mistake by not being with Jon?”

“I can’t answer that for you, honey,” Elena frowned. “They both have their pros and cons.”

“Sometimes, I think I made a mistake for going out with Grant,” Samantha admitted, feeling a wave of guilt wash over her. “He’s a great guy and treats me so well, but I’m just so confused with Jon. I just don’t know what to do anymore.”

“How have you feeling about Jon lately?” Elena asked, pushing her long, dark hair out of her face. Samantha played with the ends of her hair as she tried to ignore Elena’s question. “Hello? Sam, I know you can hear me. Answer my question!”

She let out a groan and tossed her head back against the couch. “Jon makes me feel so confused about everything. I thought I was over him and that I was happy with Grant. But after I found out you were leaving Jon has been there for me and Grant wasn't. Jon was so sweet and comforting. I mean, he invited me to be with him and his family for a whole month to cheer me up. I don’t even remember the last time I saw Grant.”

“Look, maybe you should take a break from Grant from a while to get your head straight. And with Jon being in Winnipeg for the next month it’ll be easier for you to make your decision.”

“What decision do I have to make?”

“To be with Jon or Grant. It’s not fair to be stringing either of them along. If you and Jon still have feelings for each other it’s not fair to still be with Grant.” Elena explained, as Adam walked past behind her.

Adam leaned on the counter next to Elena as he chewed his gum. “What decision are we making now?”

“Nothing, Burish,” Samantha smiled, rolling her eyes. “How’s the new team?”

He shrugged, “not bad so far. I didn't meet all of them yet since everyone is on vacation.” The only reason why he and Elena left for Dallas so early was because it was easier for them to talk to the realtor and contractors. They were currently renting a townhouse while their house was still under construction. “What are you guys talking about?”

“Stop being nosey,” Elena laughed, shoving him out of the way. Samantha smiled as Adam pushed Elena back, pushing her off of her seat. “Adam, you ass,” she laughed. “Listen, I gotta go, but promise me you’ll do the right thing.”

The three of them said their goodbye’s before signing off. Samantha sighed as she closed her laptop and placed it on the corner of her coffee table. How was she supposed to do the right thing if she didn’t even know what she had wanted?