Not Over You

“So, did you like the cupcakes I sent you?” Samantha asked as she rubbed her neck with her free hand, while the other was used to hold her phone up to her ear. She had been hard at work the past few days and the work load was taking a toll on her body.

Jon let out a little chuckle, “I did. They key lime was my favorite.”

“I know, I remembered,” she smiled. “How’s home treating you?”

“I’m not going to lie, it’s amazing,” he gushed. She could tell he had a big smile on his face. “The city threw me a parade and it’s been fun catching up with family and old friends.”

“Aw, Jon, that’s great. I’m so glad-“

Ana cut off Samantha’s conversation with Jon. “Sam, Grant’s here and wants to see you.”

Samantha was really confused when she heard Grant’s name. They had occasional phone call throughout the week but this was her first time seeing him in almost two weeks. She knew that he was very busy with work, but two weeks seemed to be pushing it.

“Sam? Are you there?” Jon questioned after a few minutes of silence.

“Uh, yeah, sorry. Something came up at work. I’ll text you later,” she quickly hung up her phone and slipped her phone into her back pocket before she quickly checked on the cookies that were baking in the oven. Since they had roughly 10 more minutes to cook, went out front to talk to Grant. He was sitting in the back corner, eating a slice of apple pie. “Grant,” she said weakly.

“Well don’t sound so happy to see me,” he teased. Grant stood up and pecked her lightly on her lips before asking her to sit down. “I’m really sorry that I haven’t seen you lately. Work has just been crazy with the new commercial we’ve been working on.”

“Don’t worry, I understand,” she smiled. “Work always comes first,” she couldn’t help but feel a little saddened when she said this, because she always felt like work was the reason why she couldn’t be in a stable relationship.

Grant took a sip of his plain coffee before speaking again. “How have you been holding up since Elena left?”

She sighed lightly, resting her arms on the table. “I’ve been okay. We talk on the phone a lot but it’s still weird without her.”

“I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you when she left. I really wanted to be,” he said, holding her hand. Her stomach did a little flip, not sure if she was glad that he grabbed her hand or not. “How about you come over for dinner tonight? I’ll make dinner and try to make it up to you.”

Grant smiled at her, making her feel guilty for going out with Jon before he left for Winnipeg. It was an innocent lunch but it bought up old feelings she was sure never went away. Part of her even felt guilty for even doubting her feelings for him.

“I’d like that,” she smiled again, this time she didn’t mean it. “I’ll bring over some apple pie if you want.”

“Sounds great,” he nodded. Samantha stood and walked over to Grant to peck his cheek. He quickly wrapped his arms around her waist, pressing his chest on her lower stomach. She felt uncomfortable but didn’t push him away. “Where are you going?”

She laughed nervously, but luckily he didn’t pick up on it. “I have to get back to work. Those cookies are going to burn if I don’t get them out now.”

“Fine,” Grant playfully rolled his eyes. “I’ll see you later. Be at my house around seven.”

“Seven thirty,” she corrected. “I have to change out of these dirty clothes.”

She flashed him a quick smile before walking back into the kitchen. She put the oven mitt on and took out the cookies to let them cool off before icing them. She felt uncomfortable going to Grant’s house. She had been there many times before but it felt different this time. With Elena gone and Jon on vacation, she had no one else to talk to in the city.

She felt pathetic for not having any friends since she had been living in Chicago for a few years. She thought about calling her mother or younger sister, but she knew her mother wouldn’t pay attention and her sister would be busy being a housewife.

“Hey Ana,” Samantha called out, walking out of the kitchen. “Can you do me a favor and lock up the store tonight?”

Ana nodded with a smile. “’Course. You doin’ okay?”

“Yeah, I just have a lot on my mind. I’m going to finish icing these sugar cookies and then I’m going to head out. You guys can close earlier too if you want,” she smiled at one of her favorite employees.

Ana thanked her before Sam went back to the kitchen. She quickly made the icing by scratch and iced the cookies before putting them in the front display and grabbing her things to leave. As she walked towards her apartment, she took out her cell phone and called her last resort.

“Sam!” Patrick Sharp said loudly, “what’s up? I haven’t heard from you in a while.”

She rolled her eyes, but couldn’t help but smile at his happy attitude. “You saw me like two weeks ago, Sharpie,” she laughed. “Are you busy right now? I could use your words of wisdom.”

“I still don’t understand why everyone comes to me with their problems” he sighed, but he wasn’t as annoyed as he sounded. “Every damn time.”

“You’re married to a girl you’ve known for years and you guys have a kid. To the rest of us it seems like you know it all,” she explained. “Seriously, Pat, I need your help,” she said as she pushed the button to the elevator to her apartment. “I don’t know who else to talk to.”

Patrick let out a little groan. “You’re so lucky you caught me before we go on our trip.”

“Don’t tell me you’re going back home too!” She whined lightly.

“Sam, we’re done with the season. Of course we’re all going home,” he laughed. “Come for dinner. I’m sure Abby and Lizzie will be happy to see you.”

Samantha smiled at how welcoming Patrick was. He really was one of the sweetest guys out there and could see why his relationship with Abby lasted so long.



“Am I doing something wrong here?” Samantha asked Patrick, feeling overwhelmed by everything that had been happening in her life. “I mean, I know I might be just a little over dramatic about Elena leaving but she’s my best friend. Everything else is just confusing me.”

Patrick let out a chuckle as he rubbed his face with his large hand. “God I am so lucky I found Abby in college. If I was in your situation I’d throw myself off a cliff.” She laughed a little, realizing how silly her situation really was. “Did you and Jon say that you would try and work things out or anything like that?”

“No,” she answered, “but my thing with Grant still feels wrong. I can tell that Jon still has feelings for me but I think he’s not saying anything because he knows I’m with Grant. I just don’t know what to do.”

“Does it always feel wrong to be with Grant?”

She thought about it for a moment and answered, “I don’t know.” And she meant it. She told Patrick how Grant was a sweet, nice guy. He was a hard worker and always tried to make her happy. It was just that lately, and even before she and Elena made up, she hasn’t seen Grant a whole lot.

“Do you expect to see the guy all the time?” He asked her.

She quickly shook her head. “No, but it bothers me when I go weeks without seeing or talking to him. Even when you guys were away on road trips, Jon called me every night. I couldn’t even get five minutes with Grant. And he never leaves the city!”

“Sounds like you just want attention,” he said truthfully.

“It’s not like that,” she sighed, feeling frustrated that she couldn’t get her works out correctly. “There’s just this feeling that I get with Grant that I can’t explain. Sometimes I feel like he doesn’t really like the fact that I have my own business. It’s like he wants to take care of me and wants to make me his wife and wants a grown up relationship. Like he expects me to be a soccer mom and have dinner ready on the table for him when he gets home.”

Patrick raised one of his eyebrows. “Are you serious? Have you guys ever talked about this before?”

Samantha shook her head, “I never had the chance to bring it up. I know that he made me shirts for my bakery but I kinda feel like he did it to get on my good side. I can’t explain it because it’s not like he does it all the time. He only seems to do it every time one of us brings up taking our relationship to the next level.”

“He seems like an old school guy. Maybe he thinks that’s what you want,” Patrick explained. “A lot of girls want what he’s offering you. But explain this thing you have with Jon.”

She groaned, leaning back into the couch they were sitting on. Thinking about her situation with Jon gave her a headache. But it also made her feel happy just knowing that someone besides her family cared about her so much. “We got into a few fights after our break up. He even kissed me and I still don’t like admitting that I liked it. And when I found out about Elena leaving, he was there for me. I even told him that he makes me feel a certain way that Grant doesn’t make me feel.”

Patrick saw the smile that appeared on her face when she talked about Jon. She didn’t have that dreamy smile when she talked about Grant. It almost seemed like she was forcing herself to like him. He was sure Grant was a great guy, just maybe not the right guy for her.

“And…” Patrick trailed off.

“And I felt like crying when he told me he was going to be away for a month. I felt like I should’ve gone with him and just forget about Grant. I used to have this strong feeling for Grant but maybe it was just because it was something new and I was forcing myself to get over Jon.”

He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “What did he say when you told him you kissed Jon?”

“I uh, never actually told him,” she mumbled, making Patrick’s eyes widen. “He doesn’t even know Jon and I dated. Back when the city had the charity event, Grant introduced up because he knew how much I loved you guys and Jon and I acted like we didn’t know each other.”

“Sam! You have to tell him!” Patrick scolded. “Leave right now and go tell him!” He stood up and grabbed her clutch and threw it at her. She looked up at him, surprised he was reacting this was. “Don’t look at me like that,” he said softly. “This isn’t fair to Grant and you know that. If there actually is something going on between you and Jon, you need to tell Grant.”

She knew Patrick was right. She didn’t expect him to act the way he did, but maybe that’s what she needed. She needed him to be stern with her because no one else would. She got up from the couch and hugged him.

“You’re going to make a great dad,” she said sincerely. “Don’t be too stern though when Lizzie gets a boyfriend.”

“Thanks,” he smiled bashfully. “Can I call you a cab? I’d drive you back to the city but we have an early flight tomorrow.”

“I can handle it,” she pecked his cheek before saying her final goodbye and walking out. She took out her phone and cursed to herself when she saw all of the text messages and calls from Grant. She was so into her conversation with Patrick that she didn’t feel her phone vibrate. It was almost nine and she was supposed to be at his place two hours ago.

She called a cab first since she wasn’t sure how long they would take. Right after she hung up with the cab company, she called Grant.

“Sam! Where the hell are you?” Grant questioned frantically. “Do you know what time it is? Didn’t you think I would be worried?”

“I know, I know! I’m so sorry,” she panicked. She meant the apology too; she never meant to forget about her dinner with Grant or to stay at Patrick’s for so long. “I was at my friend’s house and I needed someone to talk to.”

Grant sighed, feeling somewhat relived that she was safe, but also because he was annoyed with her. “You couldn’t have talked to me?”

She suddenly felt ashamed for everything she had done to him. He didn’t deserve to be treated like this. He deserved better. “I’m really sorry,” she sighed again. “I called a cab and they said they’d be fifteen minutes. I should be at your house in half an hour.”

“I don’t think you should-“

She interrupted him. “No, I need to. We have to talk,” she dreaded those words.

“O-Okay,” his voice cracked a little. He quickly cleared his throat, trying not to show her any weakness. But she knew how he was feeling, and it was making her eyes water. “The doorman isn’t going to be there so someone from the front desk will have to let you in. Tell them your name and that you’re seeing me and they should let you in.”

He hung up his phone before she could even say goodbye. She couldn’t help buy cry. She was confused and didn’t know what she should be doing anymore. She felt remorseful for everything she was doing to Grant. And if she knew Jon the way she thought she did, he had some sort of feelings for her. He was too nice of a guy to say anything since she was taken.

Maybe Patrick was right. Maybe she just wanted the attention. However she wanted to believe that he was wrong. She knew that she might be making a mistake but she knew she had to take a risk.