Three Cheers

We finally took little Ronan home after two days in the hospital, and Gerard had told everyone he wasn’t leaving home unless he most certainly had to. He and the guys were mixing the new songs, and Gerard only talked to Ray about it all on the phone; the rest of the time, he was taking care of the girls while I took care of the baby.

After about a month after caring for the baby most of the day, Gerard stepped in and took care of him so I could sleep. Ronan slept through the day and was up all night; Gerard was up with him, drawing, or writing, but mostly rocking him and feeding him. I was extremely grateful to have Gerard, because I needed sleep, especially with three kids.

Busy helped Gerard out a lot, especially right before bed time; Thora hated to stay up and listen to the baby cry; she slept in Busy’s room since it was the furthest from our bedroom and Gerard’s office where the baby would cry. It was such a reversal on how Thora went from wanting the baby and Busy from reluctantly accepting him. Ronan isn’t a bad baby, he just cries more than we were all used to.

Fran had come over to watch him when the two of us needed a break; Busy often went with Fran and the babies, but Thora opted to stay with us and nap. After a while, we all got used to the last night cries until Ronan was settled into a routine we were all comfortable with. We were all relieved when that day arrived.

After about 5 months of being home, Gerard and the band were assigned to start shooting a video for their new released single; Boy Division. Gerard had told me, in complete confidence, that the album would be their last and I would have to take the secret with me to the grave…or until he and the guys told the fans. I was a bit concerned about it, because I didn’t want My Chemical Romance to end; I wanted Gerard to continue the band as long as he wanted too.

But, he said; “I think I’m done being a rock star.”

I had smiled at him, “Oh, you are?”

Gerard had laughed, “Yeah, I am. I’m too old to keep being one, too.”

“What do the guys think?”

Gerard hummed, “Frank isn’t too happy…Ray and Mikey are okay with it.”

“And this is what you want?”

“Yeah, it is.”

“Positive?”

“Poitive.”

I had crossed my arms, “Okay, but when it’s all over, you can’t complain that you miss it.”

Gerard shook his head, “I’ll miss it, but I think I’m done. I think it’s time for me to hang up the microphone.”

“If you say so, G.”

So, that’s how it went for awhile; no one knew that the last batch of MCR songs would be the guys’ last album. I was nervous, almost scared, for them; I didn’t want them to part and resent Gerard. Frank had been the one who resented him the most, and I tried not to see it, or acknowledge it. Fran hadn’t said anything about it, only that she and Frank were thinking of moving to New Jersey to be closer to his family.

I had, had a feeling that it was because of Gerard. I figured Frank couldn’t take being in Los Angeles any longer if he had no reason to be. My heart broke over the thought, because I would miss them, and I knew the girls would miss them like crazy. I didn’t want to be the one to tell them, either, that Fran and Frank had already made plans to move. I think Fran just didn’t want to tell me everything…the relationship between Gerard and Frank was now strained.

Fran had invited us over, while the band was finishing up a few dates on tour, and was already packing. Busy was the one to ask what all the boxes were for; Fran had given me a small, weak and meek smile; “We’re leaving.”

“Where are you goin’?” Thora asked next, pushing Ronan’s stroller over towards the playpen where Anthony was.

Fran exhaled and looked at the girls as they both looked at her with curious eyes, “Um, well, Frankie and I are moving to New Jersey to be closer to his family.”

I bit my tongue, “That’s great, Frances.”

She looked at me, “You think so?”

I lied right through my teeth, “Yeah, of course.”

Again, she exhaled, looking beyond relieved, “I’m so happy you aren’t upset with me.”

“Why would I be upset? It’s your life.”

“I was just sure you’d be mad at me or something.”

“No, no.” I shook my head slowly, assuring her, “I’m happy for you…you and Frank.”

Fran pulled me into a hug, “I’ll miss you, you know.”

In a way, I figured that Fran could sense how uneasy I felt about it. I wasn’t mad, just terribly upset that she was leaving and we wouldn’t see each other for awhile.

“We’ll miss you, too.” I told her.

It wasn’t a lie.

I tried not to be too bothered by it, but it was hard not to; especially when the girls had whined and cried about it. I hadn’t been sure if I could confide in Gerard about it; he was stressed and on the road, and I did not want to add to it, but I had no one to talk to about it. I knew that I would wait until he got home from their last tour.

It was a rough month and a half…

When Gerard had returned, I didn’t jump at him right away; he had come home at night, just after I put the girls to bed and was feeding Ronan in the kitchen. I was surprised at first when I heard him come in, but I felt so much better when I saw him stalking in with his bags; “You’re up.”

I nodded as he came into the kitchen and leaned against the counter; “It’s 11:30.”

He chuckled, “I almost forgot he likes his bottle at 11.”

I smiled at him, “How come you didn’t call me?”

“I wanted to surprise you.” He said with a shrug.

Gerard stood and came over, taking Ronan from me; he yawned as Gerard began to burp him; “How’s everything?”

I crossed my arms over my chest, “Since you called me at 3? Nothing much; Thora did draw you some pictures.”

He smiled and continuously patted the baby’s back gently, “Biz?”

“Busy missed you, as always and she spent the entire day watching Finding Nemo with Ronan.”

Gerard hummed, “Is he asleep yet?”

I looked at the baby on his shoulder, “Nope, but his eyes are fluttering.”

He let out a small sigh, “I got into an argument with Frank earlier…he’s pissed off at me.”

I frowned, “I’m sorry.”

He shook his head, “It’s okay, we’ll talk soon.”

“Did he tell you that they’re movin’ to Jersey?”

Gerard’s brow furrowed, “No. When?”

“Well, pretty soon, everything is already packed.”

He looked saddened, “For real?”

“Yeah, I thought he’d tell you. Fran told me a few weeks ago.”

He let out another sigh, “Well fuck.”

“Hey, it’ll be okay, like you said.”

Gerard handed Ronan off to me, “I didn’t expect him to be this mad at me.”

I cradled the baby, “Maybe he wants to be closer to his family, Anthony is getting bigger.”

He rolled his eyes, “Yeah, sure.”

I kissed his cheek, “Don’t worry about it, okay? You guys will be in a small rift, but it’ll all come back to you, ya’know that.”

He smiled shortly, “I hope you’re right.”

I smiled back, “I know I am. Now, you come to bed and rest; I’ll handle the little one in the morning, because you’ll have your hands full with the girls.”

Gerard took my hand, kissed my cheek and led the way to the bedroom with heavy fatigue in his shoulders.