Wanted
5
“So unfair. You know, from now on, I’m going to call you dad. You act like him.”
No, he was never going to live this down. Ridley closed the front door and sat on the sofa trying to ignore the tone in his brothers voice, whilst not ignoring what he was saying, yes that took skill. He hadn’t told Cedar what that email had said, he saw no point scaring the child for what was probably nothing, besides, as far as he could see, he had no intention to go snooping around into the life of anybody. Hendrick Alinson least of all.
He had learnt something since he started the research on Hendrick, he scared the crap out of him. The man was positively nuts. No sense in risking a run in with someone like that, so he kept his mouth shut, remaining with his previous reason for dragging Cedar home, he got cold feet. Which was, by no means, a lie.
“You’re not even listening to me, I’m going upstairs, I hate you.”
He said nothing to stop him, upstairs was probably the best place for his brother to be, it was obvious to anyone who had half a brain that something was wrong. Coincidently, Cedar had a whole brain, the brain box would surely know there was something wrong with Ridley and would just be giving him space. He almost laugh, that thought had been funny, no matter how good a mans brain, the truth unfortunately, those who had no heart to accompany it simply had no emotions, welcome to the land of the brother.
Cedar had a habit of showing no emotion – other than anger, which he was surprisingly good at – no child could be that good at deception, so the answer was simple, in one of his smart days, he probably cut his heart out and studied it for a biology project, then he decided he liked it and kept it like that.
Dont be stupid, he’s just scared to admit he’s scared.
Ridley stood and took a deep breathe heading up the stairs. Cedar was almost seventeen, and that was almost an adult, Ridley was not his father, not his guardian, hell not even his full blood brother, who was he to keep information from the brain box? He would surely figure it out anyway and then he would be even angrier. That would not be good. Maybe Godzilla could be the hulk.
Jurassic Park meet Marvel.
He did not want to see that.
He knocked on the door, for fear of waking the inner beast, or for respect, but he would of course never admit the latter. When he received the answer which, in stronger words, told him to go away, he didn’t oblige and took it upon himself to run the risk of certain death and entered. “Cedar?”
“Did I say please come in or did I say fuck off? I think you need to go back to school Ridley, learn what I need some time alone means.”
“You never said that.”
“Well, I meant it.”
“You should be more specific with your words,” He scoffed as Ridley sat down on the bed,
Cedar moved away, almost jumping back like his brother was something of a contagious plague, Ridley thought nothing of it, remembering when he had first met him, he had left the room and told Cedar to go away he didnt want children near him, they were full of disease. Cedar had laughed and given him that cocky look he was so good at, and then left the room. This was simply returning the gesture, every time Ridley went near him, not to worry, it
happened.
One day the child would grow up... We hope.
“I need to tell you something.”
“That has been obvious since I got into your car.”
“Got into? You mean I dragged you.”
“I know what I mean, shame if you don’t. What do you want? I don’t have all day.”
Back to the diary, Ridley almost looked into it, remembering he didn’t have one he relied now on brianiac’s self programmed calendar.
“Dont make this harder for me, I can’t just blurt it out.”
“Are you dying?” His tone was clipped, the response to quick, it almost sounded hopeful. Ridley almost slapped him, remembering that the truth was, he had done something wrong and though neither of them were dying, neither of them were really threatened by it, he had risked his little brothers safety all for the sake of a stupid piece of research. It was true, he really was an idiot.
“No I’m not dying.”
“Damn.” Yes, hopeful.
“It is important though.”
Silence.
“Okay, well I got an email.”
“Oh please, if this is one of those lovey lovey emails, spare me the need to barf.”
“I’ve seen your inbox.”
Cedar nodded approvingly, clearly proud of the fact that his brother had managed to hack his email account, or proud of what he could have read, no one could be too sure, Ridley really didn’t want to be.
“No, I’ll show you it, I think that’s best.” He handed the phone over to the brain box he would have no problem using it, he didn’t need to be told, or directed to the page, he probably had all instruction books saved to his internal hard drive.
Note to Ridley: Buy Norton for his birthday.
He again almost laughed at the thought, biting his lip, it would be truly inappropriate. He snapped back to the room and looked at his brother as he spoke “Who sent this?”
“I don’t know, I cant see.”
“Give me your password.”
Cedar pulled his laptop from its hiding place under his bed, something almost surprised Ridley about this, he needed a laptop? Did he use google? Wasn’t he the creator of google? Maybe he was google. Again he stifled a laugh and reluctantly wrote down his password noting that he would need to change it later.
Within two minutes of the laptop appearing he heard the automated woman’s voice saying ‘You have mail’
We know that. Who doesn’t now?
Ridley watched carefully as his brother worked his magic, loading up the email, something which Ridley may have struggled to do, the next would be too blagging, for those of you who want to know. Ask google, and by that I mean Cedar, the search engine knows nothing on the minds of the greats. And the psycho’s.
Cedar noted it down on paper and switched to some website, Ridley paid no attention, he entered the email and hit search. Though he didn’t need a lousy internet connection to tell him, he knew who the email was from before the colour once again drained from his brothers face. “You’re in serious shit.” He almost dropped the laptop, Ridley was just in time to take it from his shaking hands. “Why did you email my principal? Why did you act concerned for me? You’re the reason he’s dead! You’re the reason I’m dead.” Cedar knocked the laptop from Ridley’s hand as he punched him. “I’ll kill you and that will make this all go away.”
“No it wont, and you know it.”
As though he did, Cedar dropped to the floor sitting with his legs crossed he began to cry, for the first time in, well, quick glance at the watch, confirmed around an hour, Ridley felt bad. He reached to hug his brother, a look of death was all he received. Why did he have to stiffen up? Most kids got scared and wanted support. Then he remembered, Cedar wasn’t as such a child. He thought he could take on the world. Who at that age didn’t?
Ridley stood and knelt down putting his hand on his brothers leg, this time it was accepted. He nearly jumped back as Cedars arms wrapped around his waist, his head pressed against Ridley’s chest, and for the first time since they had known each other, Ridley was holding his brother close whilst he was sobbing his eyes out, brotherly love. This was not it.
“I’m sorry kiddo.”
“Don’t be, this was... It was going to happen.” He sounded shaky but other than that, he did a good job of hiding the tears in his voice.
“What do you mean?”
“I have bad luck.”
“That doesn’t mean a serial killer would..” A thought came to him. “No, you... No...”
“Don’t tell mom, please, I’ll do anything.”
“You’re Hendrick?”
Cedar almost laughed, he closed his eyes and pulled away, his preppy accent returned as he looked at Ridley “Man you’re so stupid. Of course I’m not.”
“Then I don’t understand.”
“He was never my teacher, but, we knew each other, small encounters in the halls. More
than. He held meetings, catch up class mainly, he liked me, said I had talent, well that was something I hadn’t heard before.”
“You have talent, you’re my personal Trivia answer book.” The look didn’t scold him, the first time Ridley had said what he honestly thought, and he received a smile, one which was almost welcoming. Get the oxygen.
“Yeah, well, he knew that, I knew things that well,., You couldn’t fathom.”
Too true, Ridley agreed, he found it hard to fathom what he should have for breakfast, and that was on the days he knew as much as the word breakfast, so most days he simply skipped. So it was probably true. Once again, the smart guy knows all.
“So he talked to you.”
A nod.
“And?”
“And well, I never helped him, I want to say that now.”
“But you knew his plans.”
“And I didn’t stop them.”
“So what happened?”
“He left, I said I wanted nothing more to do with him, we were done, end of.”
“You’re talking like you were a couple.”
“Not funny.”
“Sorry, I wasn’t trying to be..”
“I know.”
“Why didn’t you tell someone? That would have been the smart thing to do.”
“And you’re Mr Always Correct?”
“No, that’s you I guess.”
“You guessed wrong. I should have said something, but what exactly? ‘Hey I knew what a
murderer was going to do before he did it’ yeah the police sure love that.”
He did of course, as always, have a point.
“You still should have told someone.”
“Sometimes Ridley, you feel alone. You probably wouldn’t know that feeling.”
He did, like you wouldn’t believe. He thought of those years as a child when his friends would all have their parents with them, moms and dads would watch sports games, take them to parties, shopping, holidays, he on the other hand had nothing. The only time he had seen his father was a night, when the man was drunk and hardly knew his own names, you can forget his sons, or even that he had a son. He would say a half hearted good night whilst gawking over some woman before he would sarcastically give an occasional ‘I love you son.’ Or ‘sleep well’ and then he would be out of his life once more. He knew what that feeling of loneliness was. Though, now was not the time to admit it. If he did, nothing between the two brothers would be the same, and he liked things just the way they were, he wouldn’t risk a change.
They were brothers, not friends, that must be remembered at all times.
For a moment, and a moment only, Cedar looked up and Ridley with a smile that said only one thing. ‘You’re my best friend’.
And with that, Ridley left the room.
No, he was never going to live this down. Ridley closed the front door and sat on the sofa trying to ignore the tone in his brothers voice, whilst not ignoring what he was saying, yes that took skill. He hadn’t told Cedar what that email had said, he saw no point scaring the child for what was probably nothing, besides, as far as he could see, he had no intention to go snooping around into the life of anybody. Hendrick Alinson least of all.
He had learnt something since he started the research on Hendrick, he scared the crap out of him. The man was positively nuts. No sense in risking a run in with someone like that, so he kept his mouth shut, remaining with his previous reason for dragging Cedar home, he got cold feet. Which was, by no means, a lie.
“You’re not even listening to me, I’m going upstairs, I hate you.”
He said nothing to stop him, upstairs was probably the best place for his brother to be, it was obvious to anyone who had half a brain that something was wrong. Coincidently, Cedar had a whole brain, the brain box would surely know there was something wrong with Ridley and would just be giving him space. He almost laugh, that thought had been funny, no matter how good a mans brain, the truth unfortunately, those who had no heart to accompany it simply had no emotions, welcome to the land of the brother.
Cedar had a habit of showing no emotion – other than anger, which he was surprisingly good at – no child could be that good at deception, so the answer was simple, in one of his smart days, he probably cut his heart out and studied it for a biology project, then he decided he liked it and kept it like that.
Dont be stupid, he’s just scared to admit he’s scared.
Ridley stood and took a deep breathe heading up the stairs. Cedar was almost seventeen, and that was almost an adult, Ridley was not his father, not his guardian, hell not even his full blood brother, who was he to keep information from the brain box? He would surely figure it out anyway and then he would be even angrier. That would not be good. Maybe Godzilla could be the hulk.
Jurassic Park meet Marvel.
He did not want to see that.
He knocked on the door, for fear of waking the inner beast, or for respect, but he would of course never admit the latter. When he received the answer which, in stronger words, told him to go away, he didn’t oblige and took it upon himself to run the risk of certain death and entered. “Cedar?”
“Did I say please come in or did I say fuck off? I think you need to go back to school Ridley, learn what I need some time alone means.”
“You never said that.”
“Well, I meant it.”
“You should be more specific with your words,” He scoffed as Ridley sat down on the bed,
Cedar moved away, almost jumping back like his brother was something of a contagious plague, Ridley thought nothing of it, remembering when he had first met him, he had left the room and told Cedar to go away he didnt want children near him, they were full of disease. Cedar had laughed and given him that cocky look he was so good at, and then left the room. This was simply returning the gesture, every time Ridley went near him, not to worry, it
happened.
One day the child would grow up... We hope.
“I need to tell you something.”
“That has been obvious since I got into your car.”
“Got into? You mean I dragged you.”
“I know what I mean, shame if you don’t. What do you want? I don’t have all day.”
Back to the diary, Ridley almost looked into it, remembering he didn’t have one he relied now on brianiac’s self programmed calendar.
“Dont make this harder for me, I can’t just blurt it out.”
“Are you dying?” His tone was clipped, the response to quick, it almost sounded hopeful. Ridley almost slapped him, remembering that the truth was, he had done something wrong and though neither of them were dying, neither of them were really threatened by it, he had risked his little brothers safety all for the sake of a stupid piece of research. It was true, he really was an idiot.
“No I’m not dying.”
“Damn.” Yes, hopeful.
“It is important though.”
Silence.
“Okay, well I got an email.”
“Oh please, if this is one of those lovey lovey emails, spare me the need to barf.”
“I’ve seen your inbox.”
Cedar nodded approvingly, clearly proud of the fact that his brother had managed to hack his email account, or proud of what he could have read, no one could be too sure, Ridley really didn’t want to be.
“No, I’ll show you it, I think that’s best.” He handed the phone over to the brain box he would have no problem using it, he didn’t need to be told, or directed to the page, he probably had all instruction books saved to his internal hard drive.
Note to Ridley: Buy Norton for his birthday.
He again almost laughed at the thought, biting his lip, it would be truly inappropriate. He snapped back to the room and looked at his brother as he spoke “Who sent this?”
“I don’t know, I cant see.”
“Give me your password.”
Cedar pulled his laptop from its hiding place under his bed, something almost surprised Ridley about this, he needed a laptop? Did he use google? Wasn’t he the creator of google? Maybe he was google. Again he stifled a laugh and reluctantly wrote down his password noting that he would need to change it later.
Within two minutes of the laptop appearing he heard the automated woman’s voice saying ‘You have mail’
We know that. Who doesn’t now?
Ridley watched carefully as his brother worked his magic, loading up the email, something which Ridley may have struggled to do, the next would be too blagging, for those of you who want to know. Ask google, and by that I mean Cedar, the search engine knows nothing on the minds of the greats. And the psycho’s.
Cedar noted it down on paper and switched to some website, Ridley paid no attention, he entered the email and hit search. Though he didn’t need a lousy internet connection to tell him, he knew who the email was from before the colour once again drained from his brothers face. “You’re in serious shit.” He almost dropped the laptop, Ridley was just in time to take it from his shaking hands. “Why did you email my principal? Why did you act concerned for me? You’re the reason he’s dead! You’re the reason I’m dead.” Cedar knocked the laptop from Ridley’s hand as he punched him. “I’ll kill you and that will make this all go away.”
“No it wont, and you know it.”
As though he did, Cedar dropped to the floor sitting with his legs crossed he began to cry, for the first time in, well, quick glance at the watch, confirmed around an hour, Ridley felt bad. He reached to hug his brother, a look of death was all he received. Why did he have to stiffen up? Most kids got scared and wanted support. Then he remembered, Cedar wasn’t as such a child. He thought he could take on the world. Who at that age didn’t?
Ridley stood and knelt down putting his hand on his brothers leg, this time it was accepted. He nearly jumped back as Cedars arms wrapped around his waist, his head pressed against Ridley’s chest, and for the first time since they had known each other, Ridley was holding his brother close whilst he was sobbing his eyes out, brotherly love. This was not it.
“I’m sorry kiddo.”
“Don’t be, this was... It was going to happen.” He sounded shaky but other than that, he did a good job of hiding the tears in his voice.
“What do you mean?”
“I have bad luck.”
“That doesn’t mean a serial killer would..” A thought came to him. “No, you... No...”
“Don’t tell mom, please, I’ll do anything.”
“You’re Hendrick?”
Cedar almost laughed, he closed his eyes and pulled away, his preppy accent returned as he looked at Ridley “Man you’re so stupid. Of course I’m not.”
“Then I don’t understand.”
“He was never my teacher, but, we knew each other, small encounters in the halls. More
than. He held meetings, catch up class mainly, he liked me, said I had talent, well that was something I hadn’t heard before.”
“You have talent, you’re my personal Trivia answer book.” The look didn’t scold him, the first time Ridley had said what he honestly thought, and he received a smile, one which was almost welcoming. Get the oxygen.
“Yeah, well, he knew that, I knew things that well,., You couldn’t fathom.”
Too true, Ridley agreed, he found it hard to fathom what he should have for breakfast, and that was on the days he knew as much as the word breakfast, so most days he simply skipped. So it was probably true. Once again, the smart guy knows all.
“So he talked to you.”
A nod.
“And?”
“And well, I never helped him, I want to say that now.”
“But you knew his plans.”
“And I didn’t stop them.”
“So what happened?”
“He left, I said I wanted nothing more to do with him, we were done, end of.”
“You’re talking like you were a couple.”
“Not funny.”
“Sorry, I wasn’t trying to be..”
“I know.”
“Why didn’t you tell someone? That would have been the smart thing to do.”
“And you’re Mr Always Correct?”
“No, that’s you I guess.”
“You guessed wrong. I should have said something, but what exactly? ‘Hey I knew what a
murderer was going to do before he did it’ yeah the police sure love that.”
He did of course, as always, have a point.
“You still should have told someone.”
“Sometimes Ridley, you feel alone. You probably wouldn’t know that feeling.”
He did, like you wouldn’t believe. He thought of those years as a child when his friends would all have their parents with them, moms and dads would watch sports games, take them to parties, shopping, holidays, he on the other hand had nothing. The only time he had seen his father was a night, when the man was drunk and hardly knew his own names, you can forget his sons, or even that he had a son. He would say a half hearted good night whilst gawking over some woman before he would sarcastically give an occasional ‘I love you son.’ Or ‘sleep well’ and then he would be out of his life once more. He knew what that feeling of loneliness was. Though, now was not the time to admit it. If he did, nothing between the two brothers would be the same, and he liked things just the way they were, he wouldn’t risk a change.
They were brothers, not friends, that must be remembered at all times.
For a moment, and a moment only, Cedar looked up and Ridley with a smile that said only one thing. ‘You’re my best friend’.
And with that, Ridley left the room.