Beautiful Mess

I made an appointment to see a doctor and asked Lacey to come with me so I didn't have to go alone. I was nervous and all kinds of afraid, and I just really needed someone there.

"People probably think we're a couple," Lacey whispered with a giggle as we sat in the waiting room.

I laughed and shook my head at her, and then we both fell silent again. I knew that she was dying to ask me if I'd talked to Matt, but was holding off the best she could.

When I finally saw the doctor, she told me everything looked fine, but said I definitely need to relax so I wouldn't be so stressed. She told when I need to come in for another check up, and then we were done.

Lacey and I decided to go out and have lunch, and neither of us said anything except when we ordered. Then, I guess Lacey couldn't hold it in any longer. "Did you tell Matt yet?"

I sighed and looked away from her. "No."

"Lindsey!" she yelled. "You've known for a week, don't you think it's about time for him to find out?"

"Look, I'm just not ready yet. I still need some time."

Her eyes widened, and I saw her hands curl into fists. "There isn't more time, Lindsey! Matt's on tour, traveling to all sorts of places and meeting all sorts of beautiful girls. You dumped him, and now he's free to do what he wants with any of them. You have to tell him before he completely moves on and finds someone else!"

"I'm not going to get back together with Matt just because of this," I said. "I broke up with him for a reason, and I'm not telling him just so we can start dating again!"

She groaned and rolled her eyes. "I'm not saying you should tell him just because I want you guys back together. You should tell him because it's his baby, and it's the right thing to do!"

"I know it's the right thing to do," I said, keeping my eyes on my lap. "I just don't have the courage to talk to him yet. I'm really scared, you know?"

She reached over the table and took my hand. "Yeah, I know. But you really shouldn''t be."

After that, she dropped the subject of Matt and we started talking about the baby. "You guys need a daughter," Lacey said, picking at the salad we'd just received. "I don't know why, I just see Matt with a little girl. And then, of course, you could name her after me!"

I rolled my eyes and laughed. "What if it's a boy?"

She quickly shook her head. "Don't talk that way! It's a girl."

When I actually stopped and thought ahead to when the baby was born, I got a little excited about it. It was still scary beyond belief, but the thought of being a mom made me feel a little warm inside.

We finished eating and walked out to our cars together. Before we left, Lacey wrapped her arms around me and hugged me tightly. "It's all going to be alright, but you have to tell Matt. And if you don't, I will."