Beautiful Mess

Matt and I stood outside the bus together, and just as we were about to get on he stopped me. "Wait right here for a second, okay?"

I nodded and let go of his hand, then leaned back on the side of the bus and watched him disappear. I knew he was going in before me to tell the guys to be cool and not mention the baby. It only took a minute or two before he was standing in front of me again. "Let's go," he smiled, taking my hand again.

I stepped onto the bus and looked around at the four other sets of eyes that landed on me as soon as I appeared. "Hey guys," I said, attempting to smile.

They all just stared at me with weak smiles, and I heard Matt clear his throat next to me. They looked away from me, expect for Jimmy, who came over and picked me up. "Where have you been, bitch? I fucking missed you!" He placed a sloppy kiss on my cheek, making me giggle.

"Alright, alright," I heard Matt say. "Give me my girl." He took me from Jimmy's arms and placed my back on the ground, leaving one arm around my waist. He nodded his head toward the back of the bus and starting leading me there.

He pushed a door open, revealing a room with a large couch, and took me over to it. We both sat down, and he immediately pulled me closer to him. "What are we doing back here, Matt?" I asked. "Don't you want to be with the guys?"

"Lindsey, I've only had you back for three days, and we spent the entire time packing your stuff up. I just want to be with you for a little while, okay?"`

I let my hand rest on his leg and grinned at him. "How did you manage to get cuter and sweeter since last month?"

He sighed and his lips lightly touched my forehead. "I thought I'd lost you for good, Linds. I didn't even know if I would ever see you again, so now that I have you back, I'm doing everything I can to keep you."

"Matt, I was stupid," I said. "I'm never leaving you again."

He smiled and pulled me into his lap. His lips met mine almost immediately as he pulled my legs around his waist. "You know, we stil haven't had our night," he said with a hint of a smirk.

I sighed and shook my head. "We can't. The doctor at the emergency room said I have to wait a few weeks."

He frowned. "Why?"

"I'm not exactly sure, I wasn't listening that well. Something about infection? Yeah, basically I'm not supposed to put anything up there."

He laughed at me and kissed my lips again. "Well, fuck. I was kind of looking forward to it."

I shook my head. "I don't think I could do it anyway. I'm not ready for...I..."

"Shh, okay I'm sorry," he whispered, wrapping his arms tightly around me and pulling my head down to his shoulder. "Don't start crying again, okay? Everything's fine."

I took a few a deep breaths and finally relaxed again. I turned my head a little and kissed his neck softly. "You know," I said, reaching for the button on his jeans, "just because you can't do anything to me, doesn't mean I can't do anything for you."