Beautiful Mess

It took me more than an hour to find the right place, considering I'd only been here once before. I stepped out of my car and walked up the driveway, which seemed to take forever. By the time I reached the front door, it had opened and Matt was standing there looking back at me.

I stared back at him, feeling my hands starting to shake. "Why didn't you tell me that you and Val broke up?"

"Oh," he said, pushing his hand back through his hair. "I don't know."

"No!" I yelled. "You're not giving me that bullshit like you do every time I ask you something serious! Lacey just told me that you dumped Val last month, so I think I deserve an explanation for why you come into my shop every week and buy roses for the girlfriend you dont have!"

"Because I wanted to see you, okay!?" he shouted back at me. "I can't get you out of my fucking head! You're all I've thought about since the first time I walked into that damn flower shop!"

I looked at the ground with my mouth hanging open like a complete fool. I tried to find something, anything, to say but my mind was blank. Matt didn't say anything. he just stood there with his arms crossed and an angry look on his face. Finally, my brain seemed to work again. I swallowed and looked back up at him before I spoke. "How come you never told me that before?"

His expression softened and his mouth turned up into one of those beautiful smiles. "Because I know you, Lindsey. It's like you said at lunch earlier, you push guys away. I didn't want to scare you off. I figured if I kept taking you to lunch as my friend, you might warm up to the idea of being more than friends."

"I've been warmed up to that idea," I spoke softly.

He took a step toward me and placed his hands on my arms. "I know. I just didnt want to push you." He pulled me inside the house, letting the door slam shut. He pulled my body close to his, and my heart sped up furiously. It suddenly felt like the temperature had risen about one hundred degrees. His hazel eyes met my own, and before I knew it his lips were pressed to mine.

My whole body froze up and my hands clenched into tight fists. Matt pulled away and aised an eyebrow. "Was that not okay?"

"No, it was good," I said, a bit embarrased.

He started laughing. "Relax, Linds. It's just kissing, and it's not a big deal." He pulled me in again and wrapped his arms around me before placing his mouth on mine once more.

I tried to calm my nerves as I moved closer to him. I put my hands on his waist and grabbed fistfuls of his t-shirt. "What's your mind telling you?" he asked as he moved his lips down to my neck.

"To get out of here and never see you again," I answered truthfully. "That getting involved with someone isn't going to get me anything but a broken heart."

He pushed the sleeve of my blouse down my arm and kissed my shoulder. "What's your heart telling you?"

I kept my eyes shut tightly and never release my grip on his shirt. "That I want you. That I want to be with you, because somewhere deep down I don't believe you would ever hurt me."

"You get to choose which one you're going to listen to," he said as pulled my sleeve back up and met my eyes again. "Stay with me tonight?"

I bit my lip as I thought it over. My hands finally relaxed and rested gently on his hips as I smiled up at him. "Alright."