You Got Me Poppin Champagne

ALEX’S POV

I walked into the living area and saw Erin right where I had left her, asleep on one of the couches. The dogs were still going mental, but Erin slept straight through it. “Alright guys, easy, I missed you too, but you gotta let Erin sleep kay? She’s real tired.” Bas and Peyton seemed to understand at least a little and decided to chase each other to their bed for the night, which was probably the bed in one of the two guest rooms, one of them was Erin’s old room, but I liked to call it the shrine seen as it still had those posters of the band and mainly me. I laughed a little to myself as I remembered the times when I’d walk in on her watching Straight To DVD or some stupid shit with us on. Of course, she still did it. You can never take the fan outta girl.

I made my way to the couch and leaned down, close to her sleeping face. Her blonde hair fell softly over her face in places, her lips were slightly parted and her brows slightly furrowed as she murmured my name in her sleep. A small smile graced her lips and I fell a little more in love. I shook her shoulder slightly, not really wanting to wake her up, but knowing I had to. “Come on baby, you gotta get up,” I said softly.

Erin mumbled my name again, but her eyes stayed firmly shut. I sighed as she snuggled in deeper to the couch.

“Baby, I’m home, come on sweetie,” I said as I stroked her hair away from her face. No response. Oh well, I thought to myself, guess I was carrying her to bed then, because I didn’t fancy trying to sleep on that couch. I didn’t think it had enough room for two people when one was pregnant…then again, it was a pretty big couch. But I didn’t want a bad back and I didn’t want Erin having one either. So I somehow managed to collect her in my arms and carried her up the stairs.

The dogs seemed to be fast asleep in the shrine and I hadn’t heard anything off Jasey. I lay Erin down on the bed and left her for a minute to double check Jasey. Nope, everything was fine. I made my way back to our room, thinking that maybe the movement would have caused Erin to wake up. But no. She was still fast asleep. I chuckled to myself and changed into shorts and a tshirt to sleep in. Some how I managed to get Erin out of her clothes and into pyjamas. Well, I say pyjamas, more so one of my hoodie’s and some fluffy warm pyjama bottoms she owned that just about fit her with the bump. I made a mental note to buy her some more maternity clothes. I made sure she was comfortable under the covers before turning the light out and getting into bed myself. As soon as I wrapped my arms around her, she started to stir, which was good because although I wanted her to get enough rest, I wanted to be with her and talk to her even more. I guess you could say I was selfish like that.

“Well hello there sleeping beauty, you took your time waking up,” I whispered into her ear as I somehow managed to make out her eyes fluttering open in the dark.

“Alex? You’re back already?” she asked as if she was half asleep.

“Yeah, I’ve been back for a few hours now. You just wouldn’t wake up when I wanted you to.”

“Oh…did you read to Jasey before she went to sleep?” Erin asked me, making sure our daughter hadn’t missed out on anything. I smiled into the darkness.

“Mmhmm, read her one of the music theory books.”

Erin slapped me weakly, which made me chuckle. “She’s never gonna learn to talk or read or write properly if you keep teaching her music, asshole,” she said half serious, but I knew she was joking really.

“Oh shut up, you know I read her fairy tales too. But personally, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it…some of the best musicians could read music before they could read words.”

Erin laughed slightly. You could tell she was still tired. “You just want our kids to be musicians. Don’t turn out to be one of those dads who force their kids to be someone else, alright?”

“I won’t. You know I won’t.”

Erin raised her head slightly and I could just make out her heart wrenching smile. “I know. You’re too good for that.”

I found her lips in the dark, only meaning to give her a swift peck, but somehow I let it become slow and gentle, communicating without words, telling her just how much I missed her. After a few minutes of us kissing like that, Erin pulled away and sighed, resting her head on my chest again.

“I missed you so much Alex…” she told me. I smiled.

“I missed you too, just ask the guys.”

“It was so hard…I…I didn’t know what was going to happen…I got so scared…I didn’t want you to be angry…I…I…” I heard her voice break and the threat of tears lived up to expectations as I heard her try to hide her small sobs, feeling moisture on my shirt.

“Hey, hey, what happened? It’s okay now, I’m here,” I told her, trying not to let the alarm in my voice rise and scare her away from telling me.

“I just…I missed you so much,” she said, obviously trying to hide or delay whatever it was she had to tell me.

“Erin, it’s obviously not just that you missed me. What was so hard? What scared you so much? Come on, Erin, tell me. Was it your mom? Did she come back? Because if she did, then I-“

“No, no it’s not her,” Erin said, voice barely above a whisper, cutting into my speech about how I would hunt her down and personally make sure she never got the opportunity to hurt Erin again, not after what she put us through that first year.

“Then what is it?”

“I don’t want you to get angry with me for not telling you though…” Erin mumbled. It must have been hard for her, hiding it from me. Having to go through it alone. I pulled her closer to me, in an attempt to protect her, or make up for not being there when she needed me. But I couldn’t not tour, it was my life, she knew that and I knew she was never gonna take that away from me, she wanted me to go on tour and enjoy myself. But sometimes knowing I was leaving Erin and not only that, leaving her in possible danger, well it scared me. And it made me rethink my career in even the smallest way.

“I promise you, I’m not gonna get angry. I want to be here for you. I need to be here for you, and the kids.”
“But that’s just it, Alex. I almost lost them. I almost lost our babies, or at least one of them…they thought one of them had something wrong, to do with their heart…they wanted me to…to kill it…but I couldn’t do it, I couldn’t do it Alex, they wanted me to kill one of our babies,” she sobbed into my chest.

I momentarily froze, letting myself go through all the heartbreak Erin must have gone through the month that I was gone. And then I remembered Erin needed me, I couldn’t be thinking about myself right now. “But everything’s good right? You didn’t go through with it and they didn’t force you, right? Because it’s all good now?”

She nodded slightly. “Yeah, I had to go get the results a few days before you came back. The doctor said it was all okay.”

“And you went through this on your own? You hid it from me? Why, Erin?”

“I wasn’t on my own…Cass knew…”

“Erin,” I groaned. “That’s not the same, dammit! You shoulda told me!”

She buried her head deeper in my chest, and I knew she was trying to stop herself from crying. “You’re mad, aren’t you? You don’t wanna marry me anymore…”

My eyes widened and my arms tightened around her. “God, no, why would you think that? Of course I still wanna marry you! I fucking love you Erin! You know that. I’m not mad, I’m just hurt that you went through it alone, I don’t like leaving you here, much less knowing that you have a pretty rough time when I do leave. Why didn’t you want to tell me? I mean, were you ever planning on telling me?”

She shook her head. “Not really, I figured you didn’t need to know seen as everything was okay in the end, and I didn’t want you worrying. I guess I just didn’t want you getting like this, I didn’t want you getting hurt. But I never realised how hard it would be to hide it from you when I saw you.”

“You shoulda told me, Erin. I don’t like you going through stuff alone.”

“I know, I’m sorry,” Erin replied softly, and fell asleep again. I sighed and held onto her. I loved this girl so much, I never wanted to let her go or see her going through so much pain again. I wish I’d known just how much harder it was going to get.