Don't Leave Me
Chapter One; Surprise.
Everything was fine. We were just jamming out; Vince was singing his heart out, Mick was shredding his guitar, and Nikki... Sixxdawg, as I like to call him, was pounding out the bassline. The fans were going absolutely nuts, and that moment, everything felt so goddamn good.
I couldn't help but glance over at Sixx. I found everything he did so damn hot. The way he would swing his bass back and forth, the way his hair went everywhere when he headbanged to the notes. God, he was irresistable. Like many times before, I found myself grinning like a moron, reminding myself that I was so lucky to have him in my life.
Then something unforgettable happened. No one noticed the thud that echoed in the speakers.
I looked around to find the source of the noise, and I caught a glimpse of a chubby man putting something long and metal down to his side. My eyes widened. I automatically recognised the object as something all to familiar. It was then I realized that there was no more bass. And my eyes began to water.
I glanced in fear at the spot on the stage where Nikki was. I didn't see him standing there, strumming his bass with a certain passion. Instead he was laying down, clutching his chest and grimacing. I lept from my drum kit and rushed over to my lover's side. I scooted over so I was by his head, then I sat down, crossing my legs 'Indian style'.
"It's okay, Sixx... it'll be fine, I promise," I said as I lifted Nikki's head so it was resting on my lap. At that point, I didn't care about the fans staring at me in confusion, or the fact that the tour was probably going to be cancelled. All I cared about was my beloved Sixxdawg... I just wanted him to stay alive. I wanted him to stay with me.
I couldn't help but cry a little when I saw blood trickle out of his mouth, coating his goatee with a crimson red. I just sat there, stroking his soft, black hair; I didn't know what else to do, and I realized that I probably look like the biggest puss ever. A groan broke me from my trance, and I automatically drew my attention to the man in my arms.
Nikki looked terrible, certainly not like his usual, optimistic self. His mouth was contorted in the most painful expression I'd ever seen, and he struggled to open his eyes. When he did, I winced; it seemed as though there was no light in them anymore. His eyes focused on my face, and I noticed that there was a sparkle in those hazel eyes of his.
"Sixx..." I continued to stroke his hair as I spoke. "You can't give up, okay?"
Nikki coughed, and I grimaced as I heard the blood gurgle in the back of his throat and eventually it flowed out of the corners of his mouth. He then used all of his energy to give me a little smile, and I couldn't help but give a sad chuckle.
"T-Bone... I don't know... how much longer I can..."
I gripped his hand tightly with my own, and I squeezed it occasionally just to keep Nikki awake. I couldn't stop the tears that fell down my face, and I brushed his hair out of his beautiful eyes.
"You better hang on, you son of a bitch. I love you so much, Sixx... I don't want you to leave me. I... I can't imagine life without you..."
Nikki's smile went to a frown. He tried to left his hand up, and when I noticed, I grabbed his hand.
"Where?"
Nikki was having trouble breathing now, and I could hear the rasping and gasping of his breath. He tried to catch his breath, then answered my question in a whisper.
"Your... face..."
I started to bawl and lifted his hand up so it rested on my cheek. I saw his own eyes start to water as he wiped my tears away. Then, he smiled again.
"Tommy... I'll always love you... no matter where I am... I just... I want you to be... happy..."
I turned Nikki around so instead of on my lap, he was laying in my arms. I ran a hand through his hair, which was now soaked in sweat. I looked in his eyes and cried even more.
"How the hell am I supposed to be happy without you? You... you can't just... give up."
Using all the energy he had, Nikki lifted his other hand so it was resting on the back of my neck.
"Don't be scared, Tommy... just... give me one... last..."
I already knew what Sixxdawg was going to say, and before he finished his sentence, I had his lips locked with mine. I could tell he was using so much of his strength just to kiss me back.
It seemed like that kiss lasted an eternity, and I had no problem with that. But then, I felt the hand on my cheek slip, and I heard the clang of rings against the stage floor. The lips that were pressed so passionately against mine were still, and the body of my lover felt so much heavier than before.
I leaned back and looked at Nikki's face. It was the most peaceful I had ever seen it, and I couldn't bear it. I cried the hardest I'd ever cried, and I screamed in agony. I gripped Nikki's shirt and buried my head into the crook of his neck, taking in the smell of his shampoo and hairspray. Somehow, I ended up laying on the floor, cuddled up next to my motionless lover. I continued to cry and scream for I don't know how long.
"You fucker! Don't leave me alone! DON'T LEAVE ME!"
I couldn't help but glance over at Sixx. I found everything he did so damn hot. The way he would swing his bass back and forth, the way his hair went everywhere when he headbanged to the notes. God, he was irresistable. Like many times before, I found myself grinning like a moron, reminding myself that I was so lucky to have him in my life.
Then something unforgettable happened. No one noticed the thud that echoed in the speakers.
I looked around to find the source of the noise, and I caught a glimpse of a chubby man putting something long and metal down to his side. My eyes widened. I automatically recognised the object as something all to familiar. It was then I realized that there was no more bass. And my eyes began to water.
I glanced in fear at the spot on the stage where Nikki was. I didn't see him standing there, strumming his bass with a certain passion. Instead he was laying down, clutching his chest and grimacing. I lept from my drum kit and rushed over to my lover's side. I scooted over so I was by his head, then I sat down, crossing my legs 'Indian style'.
"It's okay, Sixx... it'll be fine, I promise," I said as I lifted Nikki's head so it was resting on my lap. At that point, I didn't care about the fans staring at me in confusion, or the fact that the tour was probably going to be cancelled. All I cared about was my beloved Sixxdawg... I just wanted him to stay alive. I wanted him to stay with me.
I couldn't help but cry a little when I saw blood trickle out of his mouth, coating his goatee with a crimson red. I just sat there, stroking his soft, black hair; I didn't know what else to do, and I realized that I probably look like the biggest puss ever. A groan broke me from my trance, and I automatically drew my attention to the man in my arms.
Nikki looked terrible, certainly not like his usual, optimistic self. His mouth was contorted in the most painful expression I'd ever seen, and he struggled to open his eyes. When he did, I winced; it seemed as though there was no light in them anymore. His eyes focused on my face, and I noticed that there was a sparkle in those hazel eyes of his.
"Sixx..." I continued to stroke his hair as I spoke. "You can't give up, okay?"
Nikki coughed, and I grimaced as I heard the blood gurgle in the back of his throat and eventually it flowed out of the corners of his mouth. He then used all of his energy to give me a little smile, and I couldn't help but give a sad chuckle.
"T-Bone... I don't know... how much longer I can..."
I gripped his hand tightly with my own, and I squeezed it occasionally just to keep Nikki awake. I couldn't stop the tears that fell down my face, and I brushed his hair out of his beautiful eyes.
"You better hang on, you son of a bitch. I love you so much, Sixx... I don't want you to leave me. I... I can't imagine life without you..."
Nikki's smile went to a frown. He tried to left his hand up, and when I noticed, I grabbed his hand.
"Where?"
Nikki was having trouble breathing now, and I could hear the rasping and gasping of his breath. He tried to catch his breath, then answered my question in a whisper.
"Your... face..."
I started to bawl and lifted his hand up so it rested on my cheek. I saw his own eyes start to water as he wiped my tears away. Then, he smiled again.
"Tommy... I'll always love you... no matter where I am... I just... I want you to be... happy..."
I turned Nikki around so instead of on my lap, he was laying in my arms. I ran a hand through his hair, which was now soaked in sweat. I looked in his eyes and cried even more.
"How the hell am I supposed to be happy without you? You... you can't just... give up."
Using all the energy he had, Nikki lifted his other hand so it was resting on the back of my neck.
"Don't be scared, Tommy... just... give me one... last..."
I already knew what Sixxdawg was going to say, and before he finished his sentence, I had his lips locked with mine. I could tell he was using so much of his strength just to kiss me back.
It seemed like that kiss lasted an eternity, and I had no problem with that. But then, I felt the hand on my cheek slip, and I heard the clang of rings against the stage floor. The lips that were pressed so passionately against mine were still, and the body of my lover felt so much heavier than before.
I leaned back and looked at Nikki's face. It was the most peaceful I had ever seen it, and I couldn't bear it. I cried the hardest I'd ever cried, and I screamed in agony. I gripped Nikki's shirt and buried my head into the crook of his neck, taking in the smell of his shampoo and hairspray. Somehow, I ended up laying on the floor, cuddled up next to my motionless lover. I continued to cry and scream for I don't know how long.
"You fucker! Don't leave me alone! DON'T LEAVE ME!"