Learning to Fall

I groaned as I heard my alarm going off relentlessly, a whole hour earlier than it normally would. I snuggled deeper into my pillow, pulling the covers up all around me.

My eyes then flew open when I remembered exactly why that alarm was going off so obnoxiously, and I immediately sprang up from my not-so-peaceful sleep. I switched on the lamp that sat on my bedside table, smiling at her beautiful picture.

This was all for her... today was a very big day.

I reached into the bedside table next to me, pulling out her special gift and headed for her room. My heart melted when I saw her, sleeping so soundly like the little angel that she was. I turned the light on and made my way over to her bed, sitting down beside the small, sleeping figure beside me.

She was my little girl, my princess, my reason for living. And today was her first day of pre-school.

"Sophia..." I whispered, shaking her gently. She squirmed and turned to face me, rubbing her eyes with her little fists. She blinked a few times, then looked at me and flashed that award-winning smile of hers.

"Good morning, daddy!" she said, practically pouncing on me. She threw her little arms around my neck and wrapped me in a big hug.

"Good morning, my angel," I said, holding her close and enjoying the moment between us.

I loved starting my mornings like this. Normally she'd still be asleep when I would leave for work every morning, so I would have to slip into her room and kiss her goodbye before I left. But not this morning. It was my job to get her up and ready, and I had been looking forward to it all week.

"I have a surprise for you," I said, holding the present out in front of her. It was wrapped in Disney Princess wrapping paper. I made sure to wrap it with Cinderella, because Cinderella was her favorite.

"Ooh, what is it, daddy?" she asked, squealing excitedly.

"Can I have a kiss first?"

"You can have ten kisses, daddy," she stood up next to me and wrapped her arms around me again, kissing my cheek and began to count, just like I'd been teaching her.

"One...two...three...four...um...," she scrunched up her face and thought for a moment, "FIVE!"

"Good girl," I said, wrapping my arm around her tiny little waist. She continued her count and hopped in my lap. I gave her the present, watching her face light up in excitement as she tore the paper off and revealed what was wrapped up inside.

"Thank you, daddy!" she cried, clutching her new coloring book and big box of 64 count-Crayola crayons close to her.

"You can take those to school with you. Now, we better hurry and get you dressed. I don't want you to be late on your first day," I said, kissing her nose. "Go brush your teeth, and I'll get your clothes ready for you, okay?"

"Okay!"

She hopped off the bed and ran into her bathroom, which was also decorated in Disney Princess decorations, just like the rest of her room. I took her special "first day of school" outfit that I had bought her from the closet and smiled. Sophia picked it out herself; it was pink with white polka dots on it. I knew she was going to be absolutely adorable in it. She couldn't wait for today just so she could wear it.

She came back in the room a few minutes later, smiling proudly. "All clean, daddy!"

"Beautiful, sweetie. Come on, it's time to get dressed."

She scrambled over to me and jumped up and down, squealing with delight that she could finally wear her pretty new dress. I helped her put it on, cupping my hand over my mouth when I saw how beautiful my little girl was in her brand new outfit.

"Do you like my dress daddy?" she asked, posing and twirling.

"I love your dress, Sophia. But not as much as I love you," I said, kissing her cheek. I scooped her up and put her on my shoulder, which made her giggle uncontrollably. I set her down gently in the bathroom so I could fix her hair for her.

I loved playing with her hair. It was so long and pretty, a very dark brown just like mine and it was slightly wavy. I knelt down beside her so that I could be in an easier position to brush her hair.

"Pigtails or down?"

"Hmm..." she said, putting her hand under her chin and thinking about it for a second. She truly was just the most adorable little thing. "Pigtails!"

I smiled and began to fix it just the way she liked it. A few minutes later, I finished tying the ribbon around her second pigtail and turned her around so she could face me.

"You look so pretty, Sophia. I love you," I said softly, trying my hardest to fight off the tears that I felt coming. This first day of school business was a lot harder than I thought it would be.

"I love you too, daddy!" she said, kissing my cheek and scampering off to the big mirror she had in her room. I followed her and saw her beaming at her reflection. "My hair is pretty daddy, thank you!"

"You're welcome, angel. Stay right there, I'll be right back okay?"

I never wanted to forget today, or how pretty she looked in her dress, so I rushed off to my bedroom to get my camera. After rummaging around for a few minutes, I finally found it and rushed back into her room. She was looking at her collection of shoes, holding a pretty white pair with pink sparkles in her hand.

"Can I wear these, daddy?"

"Of course, sweetie. Now, put them on so I can take a picture of you," I said, kneeling down so I could get a better picture of her.

She hopped down on the floor and began to put them on, strapping each one then stood back up. She posed real pretty, tilting her head to the side for one picture and holding her hands under her chin for another.

"Perfect! Let's go show mommy how pretty you look," I said, scooping her up and putting her on my shoulder like I always did. She began to giggle again, rather loudly but I didn't have the nerve to tell her to quiet down.

"Shut the fuck up, I'm trying to sleep!"

Sophia's giggling stopped and her face fell. I sighed heavily as I set her down. I could literally feel my heart breaking when I saw how upset she now looked. I knelt down beside her, and took both of her hands in mine and smiled at her pretty face as best as I could.

"Cheer up, angel. How about after school we go for a Happy Meal?"

Her face immediately lit up, and she hugged me again. "Thank you, daddy..."

I glanced at the clock on the wall, realizing we had very little time before I needed to get her to school. I needed to get ready for work as well, considering as soon as I dropped her off I needed to hurry and get there myself.

"Time for breakfast!"

She smiled brightly at me and took my hand, and we both hurried off for the kitchen. She sat down at her special spot, the one with the booster seat and the Spongebob place mat on the table in front of her.

Spongebob was our special thing, we loved to watch that show together. So I poured her favorite cereal into her favorite Spongebob bowl and placed it in front of her so she could eat her breakfast.

"Be careful, Sophia! Don't spill any on your pretty dress, okay?"

"Thank you, daddy," she said happily, beginning to munch away on her Fruit Loops.

I went to my room to get ready for the rest of my day, sighing because I had to go in to work on my first day off in what seemed like ages. I specifically asked for today off, so I could take Sophia to school and pick her up but my boss called and told me I needed to take someone else's shift for them because their reason for being off was an actual emergency. I spent literally no time getting ready, simply because I didn't care. I was a UPS delivery man. Who was I going to impress anyway?

About ten minutes later, I emerged from my room in my uniform, all ready to go. I noticed Sophia had already set her bowl on the counter next to the sink and I couldn't help but smile. She was always so considerate when it came to things like that. She wasn't at the table anymore, but instead in front of the television set watching our favorite cartoon.

"Spongebob Squarepants!" I sang out loudly, making her giggle. "I'm sorry honey but it's time to go."

I handed her the pretty pink school bag that we had packed up for her the night before.

"Wait!" she screamed, running back to her room just as we were about to head out the door. I was slightly annoyed and breathed out heavily, seeing as how we had very little time to spare. But my heart immediately swelled with happiness as she emerged from her bedroom cradling the coloring book and big pack of crayons close to her.

"Now I'm ready," she said, smiling happily as she walked passed me.

"So am I..." I mumbled, smiling as I walked beside her, opening the car door open for her. I didn't do that just to be polite, I did it because the door got jammed sometimes. I hated this stupid car, but it would have to do. Nonetheless, Sophia hopped in to the passenger seat with great enthusiasm. I was thrilled that she was so excited to go to school.

I reached over to help buckle her in, and she grabbed my hand and kissed it, smiling that beautiful smile of hers as a reward for my efforts. She really did melt my heart with how sweet she was.

I spent the entire ride to school trying to help Sophia recite her ABC's and her 123's, and before I knew it we were already there. I got out and unbuckled her from her seat, helping her get out and handed the backpack to her. She grabbed ahold of my hand and we walked into the building together.

"Hmm..." I muttered, trying to figure out where we were supposed to go. There was a big bulletin board with a bunch of papers tacked to it, so I figured that would be the first place to look. I looked at the board and found the list I was looking for. It was labeled 'Pre-K 3-4 year Old Program'.

I scanned down the list of names, my search finally stopping when I found 'Sophia Iero' listed under Ms. Turner's list of students.

"Your teacher's name is Ms. Turner, Sophia!" I said happily, before realizing she was chatting up a storm with another little girl. Sophia was so outgoing, it didn't surprise me one bit that she had already made a friend.

"Come on, sweetie. Tell your friend good-bye, we have to go."

She waved and smiled politely, grabbing my hand again as we began our way down the hallway to her classroom. I didn't pay any attention to the girl or to whoever her parents might be. Instead, I was immediately overwhelmed with the fact that my little girl was about to start her first day of school.

I gripped her hand tightly as we walked down the hallway to room 103, not wanting to let her go. I cringed when we got to room 100...101...102... there it was, room 103.

I knelt down beside her, holding both of her hands in mine again.

"Okay Sophia, have a great first day of school! I'll pick you up at 3:00 and we'll go for that Happy Meal, okay?"

"Yay! Bye daddy, I love you!" she said, wrapping her little arms around my neck one final time, hugging me tightly.

"I love you, too," I whispered, kissing her cheek before she skipped her way into the classroom.

I couldn't wait until 3:00.