All I Know to Do Is Shed a Tear for You

Jimmy arrived at Matt's house a mere fifteen minutes later, charging through the door and demanding to see me. I could see him talking with Matt in a hushed voice from the couch. Even though Matt was tall Jimmy still hovered over him. A look of concentration was etched onto his face as he carefully listened to whatever it was Matt was telling him. As Matt's hands began moving erratically Jimmy's face clouded and anger took over his facial features.

"Georgie!" he yelled as he stormed into the living room, his expression visibly changing once he took in my appearance. "What the hell happened?"

"I went home this morning" I whispered, staring intently at the mug in front of me, tears once again beginning to stream down my face. "As soon as I walked in the door she started screaming at me. It was bad Jimmy. Worse than our normal fights. She. She told me she wished I'd never been born."

By the time I had finished speaking sobs were forcing their way up my throat, making it impossible to continue with what I was saying. Jimmy wrapped his arms around my shaking body as he pulled me into his lap. He whispered reassurances as his hands rubbed soothing circles into my back. It didn't help calm the torrents of thoughts swirling in my head but it did calm the tears and the sobs coming from me.

"That's not all that happened is it Georgia?" he whispered as I clung to him. "Something else happened, didn't it?"

I nodded my head against his chest before a small sigh left my lips. Now that it was time to tell Jimmy what I had been about to do the words got stuck in my throat. I wasn't prepared for the look of disappointment I knew I was going to receive. Nor was I prepared for his words of comfort.

"I took his gun. I agreed with her Jim." I whispered into his chest, physically unable to meet his gaze. "It was a mistake. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry. I swear I didn't mean it."

Jimmy's hold on me tightened as I clung to him tighter. I kept repeating that I was sorry, the words becoming my own mantra, as Jimmy rocked me back and forth in an attempt to calm me. He didn't speak a word as he re-situated himself on the small couch. The movement causing me to look up at him.

"Georgie" he sighed softly, taking my face in both his hands. "You are so much stronger than that. Without you I wouldn't have made it through rehab. I was doing so horrible there before you came in. Things wouldn't be the same without you. You have a passion for living and it rubs off on everybody."

I nodded at him as he finished speaking, grateful for his words, and buried my face in his chest once more. Thoughts were still roaming around in my head, but they were quieter now. Less negative and biting than they were before. I was grateful for the semi silence that had taken residence in my mind.

"You aren't going home tonight" Matt whispered, breaking the silence that had taken over the living room. His expression was resolute and hard. As if he was determined to get me away from my mom. It was definitely strange.

"It's not like I have anywhere to go at this point. Zacky's mom is actually pretty strict. I can only stay there during the weekend and if you haven't realized we have school tomorrow." I stated, my tone harsher than I had intended it to be.

"So stay here. I have the extra room. It's not ideal but it's a shit load better than your house" he retorted, his tone as mocking as the look on his face. He had won and he knew it. There was no way I could deny the offer, not with Jimmy sitting right there with me.

However, I still looked at Jimmy to try and see what he thought of the idea. He was thoughtful as ever, the wheels in his head turning as he mulled over the idea. He might have still been thinking but I knew that he thought it was the perfect idea. It was already written on his face.

"It's a good idea Georgie" he started, holding his hands up as I began to protest him. "I'll stay with you if you want. Matt's new. I get that. But this is a better alternative."

I sighed knowing that I was outnumbered and outvoted on the issue. I had known that after the things that had happened today Jimmy wouldn't allow me to go home. Not alone. He would have found somewhere for me to stay. To be honest, though, I would had rather stayed at the laundromat with him, even though he would never let me. 'It was no place for a rich girl' was what he always said when I asked him about it.

"Fine. But I will need to go back to get some money and clothes" I sighed, getting up from Jimmy's lap and standing next to Matt. "I really do appreciate this Matt. It's nice. And, uhm, could you guys possibly go with me back there? I don't want to go alone."