Playground Love

My hands are shaking as I zip up the last bag filled with my belongings. My mind is running wild with all these thoughts. I turn to Angie, she stares at me with eager eyes, just as scared as me. Her stare reminds me of when I was little and I was watching my brother pack up his things, ready to leave us. The fear of him leaving, the fear of knowing he won't come back.. the fear of not knowing if he'll be okay or not.
I walk up to Angie and grab her hands, soft and warm. "Wh-where are you going to go?? You're just gonna leave with him?", she asks quietly, eyeing the two big, duffle bags on my bed. Her stare returns to me and I sigh.
"I don't know where Tony is taking me, but I'll be okay. I can't stay here anymore, Ang." Her eyes are glossy now. "I'll be okay..", I murmur.
She looks down and takes in a long, deep breath. She releases it as she looks back up at me. "Is he really worth all of this, Paloma?"
We stare at each for a good amount of time, me thinking of how to properly answer this question. Of course he is, right? Yes, yes, no doubt about it. There's no other person I'd rather live my life with.
I finally nod. "Yes, he is. He'll take care of me. Jaime won't understand- he won't get over the age factor. Especially right now, when he's angry. This is really the only option that seems right to me."
She looks away again, staring at the floor. "Tony...", she barley says above a whisper, shaking her head. "I never thought it would have gotten this far."
I let go of her hands and walk back to my bags, checking if there's anything else I need.
"Nether did I..", I murmur.
Then, there's loud banging on the door. Angie and I let out loud gasps as we stare at it, shocked.
"Open the fucking door!", Jaime yells with a booming voice.
I'm paralyzed with fear. I snap my head to the window above my bed and consider jumping out of it right this second, Angie could help by throwing down the bags. It's not like I haven't jumped out that window before, because I have, many, many times. All of those times being for Tony, this one being no exception. Right as I'm about to tell Angie to help me, my phone rings. Tony.
I quickly answer the call, Jaime's pounding and yelling getting louder and louder.
"T-Tony?!", I yell in, panicked.
"Paloma? What's going on!?", he asks urgently.
"Jaime! He's- where- where are you??"
The door gets smashed into. "Paloma! Abra esta puerta, ahora! Antes que lo abro yo mismo!!" He's really fucking pissed now since he popped out the Spanish.
Angie comes up next to me, grabbing my arm. "You need to get out of here, Paloma!"
"Come out now! The car is down the street! I'll go and get you if-"
"No- no! I'll be there!", I say and hang up. Tony stepping foot in this house is not an option, at all. "Angie- help me carry these-"
Just then, the door slams open, Angie backs away immediately as we both make eye contact with Jaime. I hold my breath as Jaime charges towards me, grabbing me by my wrists. He first looks at the duffle bags on my bed, then at me.
"No- no! You're not leaving with him!", he yells in my face.
Mike and Vic come running in. Mike grabs one of Jaime's arms and tries tugging him away. It's no use at all, Jaime tugs his arm back with force, then grabs my shoulder. "Paloma- he's not an option! Entiende!", he yells.
"Stop! Stop it! You can't control me anymore-", I say looking away, trying to not let his tight grip get to me.
"I'll kill him- I'll fucking kill him, Paloma!", he yells.
"Jaime stop!", Mike yells and tries pulling him away once more.
"Get yourself together, Jaime! Think about what you're doing!", I hear Vic say. I squeeze my eyes shut and finally feel the pain where Jaime's grip was, go away.  I look up and see Vic and Mike trying to hold Jaime back.
"Paloma, if you're going to leave- leave now!", Mike yells trying to hold Jaime back. I look at him, his face red with anger.
"You better not walk out that fucking door, Paloma! You don't know what you're doing!", Jaime yells, practically begs.
"Come on-", Angie says, grabbing a duffle bag and walking out. I follow her and we jog out the of the house.
"Where's his-", she starts to say until Tony's car parks up in the entrance of the house driveway. He hurriedly gets out of his car and runs to me.
"Are you okay?", he asks sternly. I nod, trying to hold back my tears.
"We need to leave- now!", I say as he cups my face into his hands. He stares at me long and hard, then nods, grabbing my duffle bags and throwing them into the back of his car.
"Come on-", he says grabbing my hand.
"Wait-", I say and tug it back. I turn to Angie and she stares at me, hopeless.
A tear rolls down her cheek as she throws her arms around me, pulling me in for a tight embrace. I wrap my arms around my best friend, not wanting to let go.
"Don't lose contact, please!", she begs through her sobs. "Be safe- I love you, I love you!"
I pull away and try wiping off all these tears coming at me. "I won't, I swear! I love you!"
"Paloma!", we hear someone yell. Angie and I turn around and see Jaime. Mike and Vic appear next to him, Mike ready to launch himself at Jaime.
"Go- go!", Angie says, pushing me towards Tony.
Tony grabs my hand and I get in his car. He runs to his side and slides himself in. As he starts the engine- there's a thud on my window. I look up, startled, and see Jaime staring at me with a broken expression. He's crying, I've never seen him cry before. Even at the funeral of our parents, he did his crying in private.
He pounds his fist against the window, making one last loud thud, and points his finger at Tony. His lips are smashed together, his eyebrows furrowed, and his eyes sad. "Fuck you, man. Fuck you...", he says through the tears, his voice coming out muffled through the window.
I look away, I can't see him like this anymore. I turn to Tony and watch as he stares at Jaime with a pitiful look, guilty that he's taking the only real family left in Jaime's life, away from him. I touch Tony's hand, making him break eye contact with my brother.
"Let's go..", I breathe out. He looks at Jaime one last time and sighs, nodding.
I turn back and watch as Jaime stares at the car drive away. His hands behind his head, then watch as he kicks the ground and yells at Mike and Vic. Angie stares, tears streaming down her cheeks.
I feel Tony's hand on my thigh. I look at him, his gaze ahead on the street.
"We'll be okay.", he simply says. "We'll be staying with a close friend of mine for a couple of days. But I'll have an apartment for us soon- I fucking swear. I'll have Mike or Vic drop my things off.. we'll be okay."
I hold his hand and bring it up to my mouth, giving it a small kiss. "I know.", I murmur and set it back down.
His thumb does small circles on my hand as we drive through the San Diego streets.

Tony helps me carry my duffle bags as we walk to the medium sized house. We stop at the entrance and he knocks twice. Seconds later, a man who's heavy weighted and with a thick beard appears. He smiles at Tony and I.
"Alright- come on in, homies.", he says and makes room for us to walk by.
Tony bends down and grabs my bags and walks in. I follow in after and look around the house. It's nice and roomy, very clean. To my right, there's a nice kitchen, to my left, a living room.
Tony sets my bags down behind the couch and turns to his friend. "Alan, this is my lovely Paloma. Paloma this is my close friend, Alan.", he says and pats his back.
Alan extends his hand and I reach to it, shaking it.
"Paloma, nice to meet you. I didn't know Jaime had a sister.", he says with a smile.
Tony walks to the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of water from inside the fridge. "So.. Jaime isn't going to come hunt you down, right? I don't wanna make a scene..", he says and laughs.
I stare at Tony, shocked. "Um.."
"Alan knows. It's okay.", Tony says while taking a sip from his water. He motions it to me, offering. I shake my head. "And no, he won't. Jaime doesn't even know where you live."
Alan nods and lets out a sigh. "Alright, good. You two go ahead and make yourself comfy now! You know the place already, Tone."
Tony nods and walks to my duffle bags on the floor, grabbing them. "Come on P, let's go to our room."
Our room, I repeat in my mind.
I'm going to be living with him now.. A part of me is extremely excited and happy about this, the other half.. not so much. Not that I don't want to, I'm just afraid. The first, real, boyfriend I have, and now I'm going to live with him. Just like that.
Tony and I walk down a short hallway, then he turns to a door on the right. He opens it and walks in, me following behind.
"Hope you like it.", he says and throws the bags on the big bed in the middle. "I use to live with Alan, before I moved in with Jaime. This was my room before. Now he just uses it for guests and stuff."
I sit down on the edge of the bed, studying the room. Beige walls, white carpet, and a large closet on the right. A small window to the left. "Of course I like it, Tony."
He sits down next to me and smiles. "We'll have a place to live in soon. Promise."
I shake my head and lay down on his lap. "This is crazy, Tony.", I mumble.
He plays with my hair, sending chills through my body. "It is.. I can't even process what happened with Jaime right now. But this is it, he knows now. I expected that reaction from him, though."
"I think we all did."
He chuckles and kisses my temple. "Everything will find it's place, Paloma. I'm not letting you go. I'll make this work out. Eventually Jaime will come around. And if he doesn't.."
"Then.. he doesn't.", I say and look up at him. He grins at me.
"Come on..", he says and nods his head to the back of the bed.
I sit up and we crawl on it, laying down. I squish myself to his chest and kiss his collar bones, his chin resting on the top of my head. "I love you.", he murmurs.
I shut my eyes as I feel his hands play with my hair and back. "I love you too.", I say and give his neck one last kiss before falling asleep in his arms.

When I wake up, I turn and see no one next to me. The room is dark other than the slit of light coming in through the crack of the door. I sit up and rub my eyes, yawning. As I start to wonder where Tony might be, I hear two voices coming from outside the room. One of them being Tony's. I get up off the bed and walk to the door. I push it open and pop my head out. I look down the hallway, to the living, and see Tony and Alan chatting, drinking some beers.
I could hear their conversation, and it's about me.
"...you have feelings for her, man, Unexpected. How did this even happen?", Alan asks, taking a long sip of his beer.
I can't see Tony's face, just his back. "Honestly, I don't know. At first I was like, oh.. she's pretty. My mind was too busy thinking about Stephanie to see beyond that thought for a while though. Then, as the days passed by, all that drama with Jaime, I found myself thinking about her more and more often. Then Stephanie.. it seemed like she was just gone already. Which she was- we both were-", he says and shrugs, taking a sip from his drink. "Then, that night when we first kissed, I was completely convinced that I had feelings for her."
Alan takes a drink of his beer, then sighs. "Damn.. well, now what, dude?"
Tony leans his head on the couch. "I'm searching for an apartment. I'm going to call Vic to see what's going to happen with recording my shit... and then we'll just see what happens."
"Crazy man.. that's crazy. I'm surprised Jaime didn't fuck you up even more.", Alan laughs.
Tony laughs along with him, straightening himself up. "Jaime was the scariest person I've ever had to encounter, man. I think that's when it actually hit me.. like, what am I doing? Like, yeah she's eight-teen, wow.. big age difference blah blah blah. But then there's the fact that she's Jaime's fucking sister. I just- it didn't really hit 'til that moment.", he chuckles. "When his fist came into contact with my damn face.."
"Eight-teen.", Alan whistles. "At least she's eight-teen. You fucking pedo.", he says and nudges him. They both laugh.
"Age is just number, baby.", Tony says and tilts the beer bottle into his mouth before standing up and stretching. "I love her, man. I don't give a fuck, I love her. Things will be alright."
As he turns around, I pop my head back in the room and make my way back to the comfy bed. I lay my head down on the pillow and let out one of those cliche, 'I'm in love', sighs.

Tony's right, it will be okay.
Everything will find it's place.
So long as we have each other, we'll be alright.