Escaping the Inevitable

It was the next day that my dad showed up and ushered my mom into their bedroom. The door closed didn't help their yells. The three of us kids sat in my room, listening to them shout.

"You want me to change for you to stay with me?!" my mom shouted incredulously and louder than I ever expected her to.

My dad's response was smaller, but still loud, "Yeah."

My mom laughed sarcastically, "Go fuck yourself!"

She stormed out of the room, and nearly down the stairs until my dad must've stopped her, "What's so bad about it?"

"Let me go!" my mom yelled.

That's when I crept by the door to save her, just in case. I didn't open the door, I didn't want to interrupt anything. Things needed to be said.

"Sunny, I want--"

My mom growled, "You want! You, you you! What about me? What about Joseph and Wolfgang and Danzi? What about our kids? You want them to change too? You want them to be your whores, to be at your beck and call?"

My dad didn't say a word.

My mom continued, "How do you want me to change, Frank? You want me to wear My Chemical Romance shirts and short skirts and let you fuck me against a wall at a concert? You want me to do drugs and be a fuckin' groupie? What do you want me to change for you to be a good father?!"

Again, the world was silent.

"Because I don't want you anymore! You want to fuck any bitch that makes a pass at you, and to void the promises you made to me and your kids? Go ahead, go for it! I don't want to be with a man who doesn't love me enough to be faithful; to think with his mind and not his dick."

"You don't want me anymore?" my dad sputtered.

"No, Frank."

"So, it's over like that?"

"It's been over like that," my mom muttered sarcastically, "You're free to fuck whomever you want."

"It isn't even--"

"Don't even go there! It's all about you fucking whoever you want. That's all it's been about and I don't understand it!"

"I want to be with you, and I don't want you to take my kids from me."

"I don't want to be with you, and I'm not taking them from you! They need a break just as badly as I do."

"Bullshit, you're trying to push me out of their life!"

"No I am not! I want you to see them, I want you to be their dad, but you have your head too far up your ass to do that!"

"Whatever, Sunny--"

"Don't whatever me! It's true! All you do is yell whenever you're here, you don't spend time with them."

"That's a lie--"

"It's a lie? Go ask Wolfie, he's the one you're always promising things to, and you never do it!"

My dad was silent, Wolfie didn't even look up from his position on my bed. I leaned against the door to hear them, but it was just silent.

"Instead of arguing with me and yelling at me, go spend some goddamn time with your sons and daughter. Go and mend your relationship with them, because they care more about you than I do right now." my mom exasperated and started to walk down the stairs, "You fucking idiot."

I moved from the door and anticipated my dad coming in. It took a good minute before he came in. He looked at us, "You guys busy?"

I shook my head as well as Dani. Wolfie didn't move.

"No." I answered.

"I'm gonna do what your mom says I should... Let's go to the movies."

We're all hesitant to get up, but Danzi is the first and then me. Wolfie doesn't move, he keeps his eyes on the magazine in front of him. I look at him, "Wolf?"

"I don't want to go."

"Why not?" my dad asked.

"Because I don't." Wolfie muttered, still his eyes are on his magazine.

"Hey, c'mon, Wolf," I say encouragingly, "We'll have fun."

I'm trying to coax him to keep my dad and Wolfie from arguing. Wolfie shakes his head, "No."

Dani went over as tugged his hand, "C'mon, please?"

Wolfie smiled reluctantly and bit his bottom lip, "Fine."

My dad smiled, "We'll keep out of your mom's hair today." 

None of us have a reply and follow him down the stairs. My mom came out of her dark room just then, "What's going on?"

"I'm taking them to the movies." my dad answered her.

I can see my mom holding back a remark, "Good." is all she says, "I want hugs." she smiles at us.

Wolfie hugs her first, then Dani and then myself, "Bye mom."

She kissed my forehead, "Be good." she winked at me.

Everything my mom says and does puts me at ease. This action made me feel better.

"I'll call you." my dad said to her.

"Alright."

We all head out the door, waving to my mom. She smiles happily, and I know she has some relief off her shoulders.

In the car with my dad, I can't help but to question him, "Are you mad about the divorce?"

He nods, "Yeah, but what can I do? This is what Sunny wants."

There's so much I want to tell my dad, but I don't. My mom doesn't want this, this is a solution to a problem. The problem that is my dad.

My mom doesn't want to divorce my dad, she feels like she has no choice. It's the best decision -choice- for all of us.

"I'm sorry about it, Joey." my dad says quietly.

I shrugged, "It's for the best."

My dad has no retort, no response.

It is for the best.