Status: Updates should be coming semi frequently now that I'm done with camp. By semi frequently, I mean probably once a week.
Capitol Pawns
Thirteen
I’ve been dragging myself along since Freya’s death. My head hasn’t been in the game and that’s exceptionally dangerous at this point. I know I need to step it up, but I can’t find the fight in me to do anything.
Booker’s almost literally had to spoon feed me multiple times within the past few hours, but everything that goes down almost immediately comes back up. I can’t tell if I’m genuinely sick or if my body is just reacting to how crappy I feel, but either way, I can’t go on like this for much longer.
My head is pounding and it feels like someone is pushing their thumbs into my temples. I know it’s from dehydration, but it doesn’t help that nothing stays in my stomach. Even water gets rejected at this point.
My feet feel heavy and each step I take is a chore. I refuse to let Booker carry me along anymore. I don’t want him to feel like I’m not putting in my fair share and I’m giving him ample opportunity to leave now, but he won’t. When I refuse to continue walking, he sits patiently by my side. When I get up on a whim and continue, he marches in step with me. I don’t know why, but he’s extremely loyal.
Caspar and Equinox split up from the group again today. They ventured even further into the woods past the acid pond to look for food and a clean water supply with the understanding we’d meet up at sundown. So far we haven’t been able to find any sign of life in this half of the arena, but they’re determined to give it another shot.
Caraway hasn’t been looking so hot lately, either. Her skin is pale and her cheeks have hollowed out considerably within the past few days. I haven’t noticed it until now, but she’s lost a lot of weight since we entered the arena. I’m not sure exactly how many days we’ve been in the arena, but I’m pretty sure it’s around seven or eight.
Either way, Freya’s death was the last one and I know it’s getting boring for the viewers. Nothing is happening, so game makers are probably pulling tricks out of their sleeves to spark excitement in the arena.
Day quickly turns to night and Booker and I sit up waiting for Caspar and Equinox, but they never show up. The boom of a cannon sounded earlier, but I never suspected one of them. When the anthem plays and the seal shows up in the sky, it’s Caspar’s face that’s shown.
I think I’ve become an insomniac because I don’t sleep tonight. I can’t sleep knowing my friends are dead and I can’t do anything about it. Caspar, the boy from 6 with the striking blue eyes and the tousled blonde hair. Caspar, the boy who’s so muscular and strong, he’d be able to throw me easily across a room. Caspar, dead. Dead like Freya. Dead like Colby. Everyone’s just dead.
Except me. I’m still very much alive. Mentally, I’m losing it. Physically, I’m dying a little bit each day. But for whatever reason, my heart refuses to give out.
When the sun rises, so do we. Caraway is becoming weaker and weaker by the minute and I’m sure she’s gone soon if we don’t find anything to eat. She’s so weak that Booker slings her over his shoulder like he used to do to me and carries on.
I don’t know how many days it’s been since we had a real meal, but my stomach is grumbling for food. We come across a road and decide to follow it. The only way I can describe it is something out of a fairy tale. It’s a dirt road with cherry blossom trees growing on either side, forming almost a canopy over top of us. The trees and branches are so thick, the sky is impossible to see. Booker’s sure we’re onto something, but we walk for hours without any trace of life.
“What the hell are we doing?” Caraway breaks the silence that’s engulfed our lives. “We can’t keep on like this.”
A cannon goes off in the distance, startling us all, but not tearing our attention away from Caraway’s point. That’s the second one we’ve heard today.
“I’m a lost cause, just leave me to die,” She says. “I’m dragging you guys down and I’m not getting better.”
“I’m not leaving you behind,” Booker says sternly. “You’re my teammate and whether you like it or not, I’m not going to let you die without a fight.”
Tears well in her sunken eyes and I realize just how sick she is. “Booker, I want you to leave me. I’m begging you. Don’t let me go on like this; I’m miserable. I’m being dragged around like a rag doll and all I want is to not suffer anymore.”
“No, Cara,” He struggles with his words. “We’re gonna find water. You’re going to be okay. I can’t leave you behind now because I can’t fathom going on without you, so I’m not going to give up, okay? And neither are you.”
There are three faces in the sky tonight. Hera, the career girl from 4, Equinox, and Caraway.
Tonight, instead of Booker comforting me, I’m the one wrapping my arm around his shoulder and wiping away his tears. Caraway was his little sister in every way except blood and there’s no way to buffer his loss. It doesn’t even bring comfort knowing I’m in the top eight. I just feel like an insensitive jerk when I even think about the possibility of going home because that means the others have to die.
Well, welcome to the Hunger Games, I guess…
Booker’s almost literally had to spoon feed me multiple times within the past few hours, but everything that goes down almost immediately comes back up. I can’t tell if I’m genuinely sick or if my body is just reacting to how crappy I feel, but either way, I can’t go on like this for much longer.
My head is pounding and it feels like someone is pushing their thumbs into my temples. I know it’s from dehydration, but it doesn’t help that nothing stays in my stomach. Even water gets rejected at this point.
My feet feel heavy and each step I take is a chore. I refuse to let Booker carry me along anymore. I don’t want him to feel like I’m not putting in my fair share and I’m giving him ample opportunity to leave now, but he won’t. When I refuse to continue walking, he sits patiently by my side. When I get up on a whim and continue, he marches in step with me. I don’t know why, but he’s extremely loyal.
Caspar and Equinox split up from the group again today. They ventured even further into the woods past the acid pond to look for food and a clean water supply with the understanding we’d meet up at sundown. So far we haven’t been able to find any sign of life in this half of the arena, but they’re determined to give it another shot.
Caraway hasn’t been looking so hot lately, either. Her skin is pale and her cheeks have hollowed out considerably within the past few days. I haven’t noticed it until now, but she’s lost a lot of weight since we entered the arena. I’m not sure exactly how many days we’ve been in the arena, but I’m pretty sure it’s around seven or eight.
Either way, Freya’s death was the last one and I know it’s getting boring for the viewers. Nothing is happening, so game makers are probably pulling tricks out of their sleeves to spark excitement in the arena.
Day quickly turns to night and Booker and I sit up waiting for Caspar and Equinox, but they never show up. The boom of a cannon sounded earlier, but I never suspected one of them. When the anthem plays and the seal shows up in the sky, it’s Caspar’s face that’s shown.
I think I’ve become an insomniac because I don’t sleep tonight. I can’t sleep knowing my friends are dead and I can’t do anything about it. Caspar, the boy from 6 with the striking blue eyes and the tousled blonde hair. Caspar, the boy who’s so muscular and strong, he’d be able to throw me easily across a room. Caspar, dead. Dead like Freya. Dead like Colby. Everyone’s just dead.
Except me. I’m still very much alive. Mentally, I’m losing it. Physically, I’m dying a little bit each day. But for whatever reason, my heart refuses to give out.
When the sun rises, so do we. Caraway is becoming weaker and weaker by the minute and I’m sure she’s gone soon if we don’t find anything to eat. She’s so weak that Booker slings her over his shoulder like he used to do to me and carries on.
I don’t know how many days it’s been since we had a real meal, but my stomach is grumbling for food. We come across a road and decide to follow it. The only way I can describe it is something out of a fairy tale. It’s a dirt road with cherry blossom trees growing on either side, forming almost a canopy over top of us. The trees and branches are so thick, the sky is impossible to see. Booker’s sure we’re onto something, but we walk for hours without any trace of life.
“What the hell are we doing?” Caraway breaks the silence that’s engulfed our lives. “We can’t keep on like this.”
A cannon goes off in the distance, startling us all, but not tearing our attention away from Caraway’s point. That’s the second one we’ve heard today.
“I’m a lost cause, just leave me to die,” She says. “I’m dragging you guys down and I’m not getting better.”
“I’m not leaving you behind,” Booker says sternly. “You’re my teammate and whether you like it or not, I’m not going to let you die without a fight.”
Tears well in her sunken eyes and I realize just how sick she is. “Booker, I want you to leave me. I’m begging you. Don’t let me go on like this; I’m miserable. I’m being dragged around like a rag doll and all I want is to not suffer anymore.”
“No, Cara,” He struggles with his words. “We’re gonna find water. You’re going to be okay. I can’t leave you behind now because I can’t fathom going on without you, so I’m not going to give up, okay? And neither are you.”
There are three faces in the sky tonight. Hera, the career girl from 4, Equinox, and Caraway.
Tonight, instead of Booker comforting me, I’m the one wrapping my arm around his shoulder and wiping away his tears. Caraway was his little sister in every way except blood and there’s no way to buffer his loss. It doesn’t even bring comfort knowing I’m in the top eight. I just feel like an insensitive jerk when I even think about the possibility of going home because that means the others have to die.
Well, welcome to the Hunger Games, I guess…
♠ ♠ ♠
Well, four more are dead and the games are picking up! Sorry for the vagueness of this chapter. I don't know if it's the fact that it's 1am or me getting into the role of Scout who's at that point where she's just kind of living. Not experiencing or noticing anything, just living. I'd like to pretend it's me being a good writer, but let's be serious... No, but really, thank you so much for reading! Comment? It means the world to me!