Tristis Nox

Luka gave me a tour of the entire village and told me of how some of the buildings were changing. I was also informed that since the ambush, no other fights have broken out. We talked for hours as we walked through the entire place and stopped to talk with some of the people I fought beside during the fight. I bought two dozen flowers and as we passed by the cemetery, I placed a flower on the fallen villager’s graves in thanks for protecting the village. I prayed for each of them as I read their names and placed a flower. At the last person’s grave I stopped to think, always a dangerous thing for me. *These men and women who gave up their lives that day were a few of many who will lay down their lives for this planet to be reborn. These people did so willingly, yet soon everyone will without so much as volunteering.* I looked over at Luka who was paying respects to the grave next to me. *People like Luka, who would willing to die for his village and king, will die without the choice. That’s not fair… life isn’t fair.*
“Will I be remembered for the good I’ve done, or for the wrong I’ve committed?” I wondered aloud, but barely above a whisper.
“What was that?” Luka looked over to me in confusion.
“These people will be remembered through storied and their actions. For giving up their lives for their country and village… will I be remembered in such a way? Will I be remembered for the destruction I cause and be hated? Or will I fade from memory as though I never existed?” I placed the second to last flower on the grave. “I almost hope for the latter.” Luka looked straight at me and found no sadness, only thought. I rarely think about my own death, since angels tend to live forever, but it is something I think about. “To die would almost be a relief.” Before Luka could interrupt my thought, I gave him a side-ways grin and continued, “But then what good would that do, I couldn’t meet new people and enjoy life. There is so much to do and so little time that to die now would be a waste. Therefore,” I turned to fully face him, “Never give up, no matter how tough life gets. Okay?”
“Sure?” He was confused, but agreed nonetheless.
“Another thing,” I piped as I turned and started walking away from the graveyard. “Please, don’t ever get mad at me for doing my job. I lose too many over the things I must do, even when I don’t want to do them. I know it’s a big promise, but can you try not to?”
“I don’t know what you are talking about, but you have a friend in me Tristis whether you like it or not.” He firmly replied.
“Thank you.” I gave him a ghost of a smile as we continued our walk. We ended the tour back at the tavern where I received a bear hug from Roza’s father. We talked and laughed through most of the evening.
“Tell us about your time in the capital.” One of the many men in the tavern requested.
“It may take awhile.” I laughed.
“Dozn’t mattah.” The tavern owner remarked.
“Alright, well I stayed in the palace. I met some of the aristocratic people whom didn’t seem to like me. From the moment I met them, they turned their noses up in disgust. Guess I’m not their sort of people.” I chuckled as some of the people around me growled. “Except for this one family, the Hart’s they were wicked cool. Jonathan is a weapons master and crafter who actually taught me to make a dagger, he has a daughter named Rayna who was really nice to me, we ended up becoming friends, and he had a son named Robert who’s shy but into weapons just like Jonathan. Um, I became a huge gossip topic among the status people.”
“How come?” a voice asked.
“Well, I guess most women don’t use weapons and since I fight just as well as any male that got spread around. And then I went and had a match with Jonathan and it spread like wild fire that I was on par with one of the best swordsmen in the capital. Then I ended up staying out all night with Robby, you know talking at a tavern and stuff about weapons. Want that boy to talk, start a conversation on weapons and he won’t shut up.” I chuckled. “Well, that spread and then I made fun of Lady Cast or someone and that’s when the higher ups really didn’t take a liking to me. I got to know the working class pretty well since I went out a lot to visit the stalls and shops, but I never really warmed up to the aristocrats. The King is wicked nice, and I got to meet his betrothed. Sierra is really nice, ya’ll would love her if you met her.”
There was a lot of mumbling about her, however the question that came up next was the one I dreaded the most, “Did you get to meet Crowned Prince Carson?”
“Yeah…”
“What was he like?”
“He could be a huge flirt.” I replied begrudgingly.
“Oh, did he flirt with you Tristis?” Luka grinned teasingly.
“Yeah, unfortunately. An-Princess Anita thought he liked me, but I can reassure you all, he doesn’t.”
“Why do you say that?”
“Because he just likes to tease me and see how far he can push me before I snap.” I scowled.
“It sounds like ye’ve met ‘im befar.” Roza’s father commented. I looked at him and he exclaimed, “Ye ‘ave?”
“Yeah, before I came here. I fought some thugs and he helped me after I passed out.”
“That was nice of him.” Roza smiled.
“I guess, but he coulda given me some help. He watched almost the entire fight!” I exclaimed. Everyone chuckled at my reaction. “It’s not funny, do you know how tiring it is to fight half a dozen thugs after escaping from their poorly constructed prison, running away from their wolf-dogs, and riding all night before actually fighting them? I coulda used some help.” I folded my arms.
“What kind of story could you have told if he had helped you? Now people know you mean business if you ever have to fight them.” Luka tried to look on the brighter side.
“I guess, but still I was exhausted.” I yawned and stretched.
“Like ye are now?” Roza’s dad smiled.
“Apparently. Now if you lovely people don’t mind, I’m going to bed. See yeah tomorrow.” Everyone shouted their bye’s and I left to my room. Once the door was open, I closed it shut behind me and fell instantly to sleep on the bed. Four days passed and it was getting time for me to leave. Permanently this time. I decided to retire early for the night and pay an old friend a visit. As I stood in the middle of my room, I closed my eyes and took a deep breath; willing myself to a different place. I opened my eyes again to find myself in a familiar hut. I stood in the shadows as the Elder of the village I visited so long ago mumbled to himself.
“You can feel it, can’t you?” I whispered, scaring the poor old man.
He turned around with narrow eyes, “Who is there?” I stepped from my unintentional hiding place and stood before him. “Tristis?” his face contorted into confusion.
“Hello Elder.” I bowed my head. “You can feel the change of this planet, the pulse is different.” I stated this time instead of questioning it.
“How did you know?” *How do I know indeed?*
“I’m the reason, my presence here is altering this world. It is dying because of me.”
“I don’t understand.”
I closed my eyes and opened my senses to the world. “It cries out that something is wrong with it, and if you listen hard enough it cries because there is something that doesn’t belong. Can you hear it?”
The Elder inverted himself. Within seconds his eyes snapped open and stared at me. “The pulses are pointed towards you… as if you hold this world’s fate in your hands.” I remained silent and stoic. “Why is that?”
“What if I do?” It was his turn to be silent. “You once told me I was different, you’re right I don’t belong here. I am this world’s judge and jury.”
“Are you saying that you are the reason the two kingdoms are about to fight?” The Elder asked. I remained quiet again. “I thought you were trying to stop the war!”
“If I lied?”
He narrowed his eyes. *Hate me.* “I’d want to know why. You would be an enigma, a contradictory.”
“How so?” No emotion shown on my face as I listened to this wise old man who seemed to know very little and yet so much.
“Your pulse is kind, yet sad. I have told you this before, yet you are telling me that you are the reason this world is heading towards chaos. I don’t understand.” *Hate me.*
“You aren’t meant to understand.”
“Then why are you here?” His voice rose.
“A last kind act so you aren’t blinded by what is to come. So you don’t blame yourself since it is something you can’t control. Fight. Run. Kill. Love. Protect. Do as you may, but know that you can challenge me all you want, but” I leaned in so I looked straight into his eyes. “I will win and the world will bend to my will.” *Whether I want it to or not.* In that moment he saw me for what I was: an old soul who kills. *I’m a killer.*
“You are going to destroy this world.” He growled.
“It is my mission here, yes.” *Hate me.*
“You have been playing everyone you met.” I remained silent, but thought *Yes, hate me.* “Was it all an act?”
“Aren’t we all actors in this thing called life? Don’t we all act in a certain way to get what we want?”
“Who are you?”
“You’re worst nightmare, the judge.” *The cleanser of worlds.*
“You are the worst!” He shouted. “I will do everything in my power to stop you!”
“Do your best, but know it will be for nothing.” I whispered as three people, including Wolf, rushed into the little room.
“What is wrong?” Wolf asked.
“Stop-” The Elder cut himself off when he saw that I was gone; no trace of me left behind. I felt the silent curse he whispered in his mind as if he shouted it at me. I collapsed to the floor and scurried back so my back was against my bed. *The more people hate me, the less pain I’ll feel. I’m so selfish.* My head fell onto my knees as the hours passed by like a sloth. I was left with my reeling mind and for once I wanted to get away from my mind. I repented in the darkness for the things I said to the Elder and for the deed I was about to do. Finally, light started peaking in through my window causing my eyes to slowly drift up. I stayed where I was until most of my room was bathed in morning light. I stiffly got up and stretched my sore, revolting muscles. *Time to travel alone yet again… it’s what I deserve though.* I gathered my things and headed downstairs.