Sequel: The Legacy of Rock N' Roll ›
Status: Finished
I'll Be There
Tour blues
The tour dragged on. And on. And on further still. After the first few nights I was already bummed out. I loved seeing the cities, the crowds, the energy in the band. But when I wasn’t the one onstage I started to get bored. The past month seemed like a whole year already of pushing buttons and checking equipment. I found myself eagerly awaiting a vacation from Guns N’ Roses. What better way to do that than to hang with the Crue? In fact, it was already my last day with Dj for the next 10 days. We were in Monchengladbach Germany (which I couldn’t even pronounce) and Nikki&Crue would be here the 11th. The plan was for me to stay here and await them, which of course Dj wasn’t too thrilled about. Nikki thought it was ok though, so he convinced Dj I’d be fine.
Speaking of Nikki, I happily had my phone back just a few days after the Russia incident. He’d been checking up on me periodically and assured I would have zero work to do on the Crue tour. “You sure you’ll be ok here by yourself?” Dj asked for the ten-millionth time. I sighed and thought I saw my patience wafting up in front of me. He frowned. “Sorry. Just making sure.” “Dj I’m not a kid I’ll be fine.” “I never said you couldn’t take care of yourself. Just please no more Moscow incidents? If Nikki gets here and you’re nowhere in sight he’ll have my head for it.” I sat on the big comfy chair in the corner of the room overlooking the wall-length window of the city. It was almost like a hospital room, only in a more comfortable less stinky sort of way. Kinda.
“Dj, you always say things like that. Why does he care so much? We met just after you and I did, it’s not like he’s been my dad my whole life.” He shrugged and grabbed a Monster from the room’s mini fridge. The bubbly substance made a sweet hissing sound as he popped the cap open. If there’s one thing we had in common, it was definitely a love for Monster. Dj leaned against the wall on the opposite side of the window, taking a long sip of his drink. I watched him patiently. I’ve learned that he sometimes does the same thing I do, he thinks before he acts. Usually.
Dj switched the can to his other hand, now that one was freezing. He looked at her calmly, wondering if he could even answer her question. He knew he probably could. Her green eyes were bright once again, and shone a more promising future than Nikki’s did. Although his life now was the greatest it’s ever been, dying twice takes its toll eventually. He was beginning to think that touring was exactly what she needed to warm up to him. If the tour had ended in LA, the series of events after that might have left her scarred and unwilling to trust this alien new lifestyle. But now, having two world-famous bands in her life (and family) she seemed to be built for just this sort of life. Maybe it was finally time for her to accept who she really was, not who she was raised to be. “I know for a fact that Nikki cherishes being a father. Finding out he had another daughter he never knew about probably overwhelmed him. Remember, we both know about your life, at least the parts of it you’ve revealed to us. He’s been there, and it probably hurts him more than anything knowing you were too. I bet he just wants to make up for the almost 20 years he’s already missed. He probably feels like he’s missed it all already. Can you imagine? A parent not being able to watch their child take their first steps, not hear their first words, not witness them graduate? He’s probably very upset about all this. Even more so because he never could have even imagined you exist.”
I stared out the window intently. I had watched a single cloud float lazily in the sky for the duration of Dj’s answer. I thought about it. “But how could he not know about me…how could she give me up? If I had a one night stand with a rockstar…hypothetically,” I added as I saw him give me a curious look, “and I got pregnant off of it, then why would I give up the child? Where the hell is my birth certificate, doesn’t she have to write my father’s name on it??” He shook his head. “I don’t know any of that, unfortunately neither does he. Remember, he had no idea that he could have another kid.” I exhaled and watched my bangs fly up over my eyes only to land back over them, obscuring my view of the cloud. It had wafted further to the left. It now had a pink-ish hue as the sun began to set. Then I remembered my mother’s words, all those nights ago. ‘I was only worried about myself…’ I watched my cloud fade away and sighed silently. I understand. “We should head to the venue soon, the guys will kill me if they have to do my sound check for me.” I nodded my agreement. “Alright, give me a minute to freshen up, I’ll be right back.” As I shut the bathroom door behind me I thought more about this being my last night with him for a while. We had never really been apart except for his rehearsals. I was beginning to listen to my heart instead of my confused thoughts. That I loved him was a fact, that I would miss him was true also. But I was looking forward to Nikki time. He’d been busy with Courtney and his kids and tour plans for a while, we needed time together. I needed dad time.
Speaking of Nikki, I happily had my phone back just a few days after the Russia incident. He’d been checking up on me periodically and assured I would have zero work to do on the Crue tour. “You sure you’ll be ok here by yourself?” Dj asked for the ten-millionth time. I sighed and thought I saw my patience wafting up in front of me. He frowned. “Sorry. Just making sure.” “Dj I’m not a kid I’ll be fine.” “I never said you couldn’t take care of yourself. Just please no more Moscow incidents? If Nikki gets here and you’re nowhere in sight he’ll have my head for it.” I sat on the big comfy chair in the corner of the room overlooking the wall-length window of the city. It was almost like a hospital room, only in a more comfortable less stinky sort of way. Kinda.
“Dj, you always say things like that. Why does he care so much? We met just after you and I did, it’s not like he’s been my dad my whole life.” He shrugged and grabbed a Monster from the room’s mini fridge. The bubbly substance made a sweet hissing sound as he popped the cap open. If there’s one thing we had in common, it was definitely a love for Monster. Dj leaned against the wall on the opposite side of the window, taking a long sip of his drink. I watched him patiently. I’ve learned that he sometimes does the same thing I do, he thinks before he acts. Usually.
Dj switched the can to his other hand, now that one was freezing. He looked at her calmly, wondering if he could even answer her question. He knew he probably could. Her green eyes were bright once again, and shone a more promising future than Nikki’s did. Although his life now was the greatest it’s ever been, dying twice takes its toll eventually. He was beginning to think that touring was exactly what she needed to warm up to him. If the tour had ended in LA, the series of events after that might have left her scarred and unwilling to trust this alien new lifestyle. But now, having two world-famous bands in her life (and family) she seemed to be built for just this sort of life. Maybe it was finally time for her to accept who she really was, not who she was raised to be. “I know for a fact that Nikki cherishes being a father. Finding out he had another daughter he never knew about probably overwhelmed him. Remember, we both know about your life, at least the parts of it you’ve revealed to us. He’s been there, and it probably hurts him more than anything knowing you were too. I bet he just wants to make up for the almost 20 years he’s already missed. He probably feels like he’s missed it all already. Can you imagine? A parent not being able to watch their child take their first steps, not hear their first words, not witness them graduate? He’s probably very upset about all this. Even more so because he never could have even imagined you exist.”
I stared out the window intently. I had watched a single cloud float lazily in the sky for the duration of Dj’s answer. I thought about it. “But how could he not know about me…how could she give me up? If I had a one night stand with a rockstar…hypothetically,” I added as I saw him give me a curious look, “and I got pregnant off of it, then why would I give up the child? Where the hell is my birth certificate, doesn’t she have to write my father’s name on it??” He shook his head. “I don’t know any of that, unfortunately neither does he. Remember, he had no idea that he could have another kid.” I exhaled and watched my bangs fly up over my eyes only to land back over them, obscuring my view of the cloud. It had wafted further to the left. It now had a pink-ish hue as the sun began to set. Then I remembered my mother’s words, all those nights ago. ‘I was only worried about myself…’ I watched my cloud fade away and sighed silently. I understand. “We should head to the venue soon, the guys will kill me if they have to do my sound check for me.” I nodded my agreement. “Alright, give me a minute to freshen up, I’ll be right back.” As I shut the bathroom door behind me I thought more about this being my last night with him for a while. We had never really been apart except for his rehearsals. I was beginning to listen to my heart instead of my confused thoughts. That I loved him was a fact, that I would miss him was true also. But I was looking forward to Nikki time. He’d been busy with Courtney and his kids and tour plans for a while, we needed time together. I needed dad time.