I'll Be There

I watched the aqua sky tumble towards me, my feet flying in front of me, then saw the green earth once again as my swing descended. I squealed in delight. “Higher Mommy!” I heard myself say, kicking my feet together as they went out once again, watching my glittery sneakers light up. The swing ascended higher as I asked. I came down faster this time. Dad ran out in front of me. “Jump this time!” He called to me, a smile on his face. His hair was long and poofy, his smile crooked yet fun. I gasped. “Are you sure?” I yelled, feeling Mom push me in the air once again. “I’ll catch you.” He promised. “Okay here I come!” I yelled, throwing myself from the swing. He opened his arms wide, ready to catch me.
I shot up out of bed, still feeling like I was falling. There was an annoying banging on the door. “Dammit I’m coming.” I mumbled, creeping towards the door and wiping my eyes. Did he catch me? I guess now I would never know. I opened the door and saw the same cocky smile that awaited my younger self on the swing. “Nikki!” I screamed, tackling him before he could come in. He laughed. “Hey.” He said, hugging me back strongly. He rubbed my hair and let me go. “Damn girl, when’s the last time you showered? Were you still asleep?” “Uh.” I said, not knowing how to answer. What time was it anyway? He laughed again and I let him in. “That’s my girl.” He said, looking around. I had left Monster cans and food boxes around, some clothes too. I rubbed the back of my head self-consciously. “Uh, sorry about this…” I said, feeling stupid. He laughed again. “Don’t worry about it, I was the same at your age.” I smiled.
“Nikki?” I asked, going to my usual spot by the big window. He sat on the bed and looked at me. “Yes?” “Do you really care about me?” I asked cautiously, not trying to sound mean. “I mean…you know.” He nodded slightly and thought for a moment. I looked at his hair curiously, he had a bandana on today, and it looked pretty cool. His eyes were the usual dull green, and he smelled like dirty clothes and cologne. Somehow it seemed friendly to me after the past few months. He was about to speak but I cut him off, wanting to get to the point. “Dj said you’re just upset.” He exhaled and glanced out my window. “Yeah.” I pulled my knees up, which was easy to do in the huge comfy chair. “Then you really think of me as your daughter?” He immediately returned his gaze to me with his cocky grin. “Of course I do, you look just like me.” I squinted. “Besides that!” “You know I do.” He said seriously. “Dj’s right, I don’t know what he told you but I assume he knows how I feel.” I stared at him patiently. He looked back.
He stood up suddenly and stretched. “Well, c’mon. Don’t wanna be late for our gig now do we?” “No way!” I yelled happily. He stopped and gave me a pondering look. “What’s that for?” I asked cautiously, raising an eyebrow at him. “Come here, we need to fix you up.” “Fix?” I asked, following him to my bathroom. He immediately located my hair utensils. I took a step back. “No way, you’re not touching me with those things.” “Ray I’ve been doing my own hair since long before you were born, trust me?” I sighed uber dramatically and went up to him. “Fine.” I muttered. I sometimes forgot just how tall he was compared to me. I was just an inch or two shorter than Dj, and Nikki was quite taller than him. He studied my messy bed hair carefully before he started messing with it. “This is so weird.” I mused. "Weird?” He mocked. “You’re a guy!” I complained, making my face again. He laughed and teased my hair too hard on purpose for my comment. “Ow.” I smirked.
“Alright, you’re gonna need to throw some jeans and converse on, then I got a present for you.” “A present? Wait, no shirt??” He turned me away from the mirror before I could look at my hair. “Trust me, you’ll like it. Avoid the shirt for now, I won’t be a creeper I promise. I’ve seen many a rack in my time and I won’t be bothered in the least bit by my daughter’s.” “Creeper!” I mocked sarcastically. “Trust me!” He squeaked, echoing my voice. “Ugh.” I complained, shutting the bathroom door on him as I went back into the room to find my clothes.
I did as he said and found my jeans and converse (like I owned any other type of shoe anyway) and threw on a bra. One comfortable and not too revealing, it was still awkward being around him like that. “Ok.” I said. He came out and looked right in my eyes. “See, told you.” He said with his stupid grin. “Yeah yeah, what am I looking at?” I asked. He popped open the little bag slung across his shoulder, I assumed it was just his camera bag. He instead pulled out a black tank top and a vest. “Put these on.” He said. “Cool.” I said, taking them. “Perfect fit.” I smiled. I was beginning to feel like a rockstar already. Or a Sixx. It looked kinda like the stuff he wears. “One more thing.” He added, pulling out something else. I took it and looked it over. A wrist-cuff that said Motley Crue on it. “Awesome, I always wanted one of these!” I grinned, slipping it on. “You look fucking awesome.” He said, looking me over. “Not that you ever didn’t, but wow. Definitely my daughter.” My heart missed a beat. I still wasn’t used to actually liking my parents. I felt loved for the first time since I met Dj.
“Shit, almost forgot!” Nikki reached into his not-camera-bag and pulled out a little black tube. “The fuck?” I said. “Be still.” He instructed, coming over to me. I did and watched him carefully as he opened it. “Oh.” I mused, feeling stupid. It was face paint. He pushed my bangs out of my face and put his two signature stripes on my cheeks. “Perfect.” He nodded with finality. “Can I look now?!” I begged, wanting to see what the hell he did to my head. “I got a better idea. Can you do this?” He asked, then grinned crazily. I laughed and copied him. “You fucking rock.” He chimed, then took out his phone. He leaned down next to me with the camera on. “Do it again, like this!” He threw on his best cheesy-grin and I copied it perfectly. He showed me the pic afterwards and I gasped. “I look just like you! But with your old hair and makeup!” He nodded. I got quiet. “You know, I always wanted to look just like you. I copied you my whole life, you were my inspiration. I never could have dreamed we’d end up like this.” He hugged me sweetly, careful not to rub off my face stripes. “I’m just as happy as you are,” He soothed, “and I couldn’t ask for a better surprise than you.” I forced back my happy tears, not wanting to fuck up my makeup, and managed a cheap grin. He laughed down at me. “Let’s go before I miss my own show!” He yelled excitedly, already halfway out the door. “Coming!” I yelled, running after him.
We got to the gig, which was the same place Guns has played the other night. So naturally I was already familiar with it. Except this was a totally different show than Guns. I saw Tommy’s drums already set up, you couldn’t miss the thing. I flipped. “Oh my God it’s Tommy’s drum rollercoaster I’ve always wanted to ride that thing it’s so wicked I would kill to go on it do you think he’d let me ride it Nikki?!” I said all in one breath, leaving myself gasping. He started laughing. “Well let’s ask him.” “Okay!” I agreed cheerfully, putting a bounce in my step. We headed backstage and saw the other guys already there. “There you are!” Vince yelled. “The fuck were you?” Tommy scolded. Then they all seemed to freeze and look at me.
“Um…what?” I asked, getting nervous. Again with the stares. “Little Sixx.” Tommy said in awe. “What?” I said again. “You look just like him.” Vince said. I glanced at Mick who was standing off to the side, and he nodded his agreement. I grinned. “Awesome!” “Hey T-Bone, lil’ Sixx has a question for you.” “Well speak up!” He cooed, happy to see me for the first time since the mom incident. I could feel my eyes glowing, burning with hope and excitement. “Can I ride on your drums with you?!” I bursted, too happy to say it calmly. “Well I usually pull someone from the audience, but this time I can make an exception.” “Yeah!” I cheered, literally jumping in the air with a mighty fist pump. They laughed, I even got a snicker out of Mick. Nikki pulled me aside while they went to finish prep. “If I do something crazy, I swear it’s not me, it’s Sikki ok?” I laughed genuinely. “Sikki is still around?” He threw me his signature cocky grin, which was getting a great workout today. “He still hides in a little corner in my head. But seriously, if I do something crazy onstage, I probably won’t remember it.” I nodded enthusiastically. “Gotcha!”
Thanks to Nikki I got an awesome seat front row that he saved just for me. I felt like I was actually at a concert (instead of running one), watching my lifelong hero and having a hell of a time. I was in awe at Mick, now that I was related to Nikki and saw him often I didn’t have to gape at him stupidly, so I spent my time trying to memorize Mick’s guitar licks. At one point he nudged Nikki and handed him something, who leaned down and gave me Mick’s pick. I was ecstatic, and remembered the night I caught Dj’s pick. Although this time I knew being related played a part in it, it didn’t stop my enthusiasm. I was thrilled, and held the pick closely just as before.
The time finally came when Tommy’s drums rolled to a stop and he began huffing out curses as he tried to breathe and talk at once. My excitement was boiling over. He finally caught his breath and began talking again. “I got one extra seat on this motherfucker. So today I’d like to invite a very special friend of mine to join me for a spin. Get your ass up here Raven!” The security let me pass and Nikki hauled me onstage. I was shaking with anticipation. “Record it ok Dad?” I asked. He smiled, and I realized I had said “dad” again. “Of course.” I saw him motion to one of the guys backstage and he headed back there to grab his phone.
I climbed up the drums and let the crew guy in red strap me in. “Whoo!” Tommy yelled, I saw my face on the screen behind me and heard the crowd’s screams. “Can I get a hell yeah?!” He yelled. I was still in shock that I was actually doing this. “How about a fuck yeah?” He asked deviously. “Fuck yeah!” I yelled. He glanced back at me with a grin. “Alright lil Sixx hold on, if this thing doesn’t work your dad can’t blame me alright?” “No way!” I yelled. I saw Nikki just out of eyesight of the crowd with his iPhone out. I beamed at him and threw my hands in the air as we started moving. Tommy’s drumming was incredible. I always enjoyed the techno beats he pumped out, even though electronic music wasn’t really my forte. Before I knew it we were upside-down. My bouncy hair fell behind me and I saw the crowd cheering at the ground. Then we were upright again, and back tilted before I knew it. Even though it was dizzying, it was the most fun thing I had ever experienced. I couldn’t believe he got to do this every night for a living. We finally stopped and I got unbelted. Nikki was right behind me to make sure I didn’t fall over. Thankfully I didn’t, but I was still lightheaded. What a ride! He helped me back down and the people around me all cheered. I went on twitter to brag about it and saw a post from Nikki. It was the picture of us together. “Like father like daughter.” Was the caption. I smiled. Yeah, just like my father. I couldn’t want anything more.