Lost

August 23rd - 5:01pm

As I walked back towards the new base, I couldn't get the negativity out of my head. Everytime Fun Ghoul crossed my mind even just for a second, I was almost crippled and I just wanted to break down and cry. I stopped for a minute and sat on the sand, throwing my pack down in front of me. I carefully unzipped it and reached down to the bottom, fishing for the plastic bottle I knew I'd find there.

When I found it, I yanked it out, taking a few minutes to just stare at the bottle. I had taken many brands of anti-depressants in my lifetime, and these looked nothing like any of them. Could they really help me forget?

I opened the bottle and reached in, taking one of the tiny white capsules between my thumb and forefinger, examining it closely. There was a logo imprinted on one side of the pill, but it was so small I couldn't make out what it was. As Fun Ghoul's smiling face clouded all my judgement, I figured that trying one pill wouldn't do any harm. After all, there was only one way to find out if they'd work.

I placed the pill on my tongue and washed it down with a moutful of water from my canteen, and threw both the canteen and the rest of the pills back into my bag. I have to admit, I did feel some disappointment when I didn't feel an immediate change in my mental state. I still felt grief stricken. Still, I slung my pack over my shoulder and carried on walking, hoping the medication would take effect soon.

After around an hour the base came into view. It was only then that I realized that for the last half an hour or so, Fun Ghoul had crossed my mind several times but I hadn't felt that same ache in my heart that I usually felt. It hit me at that moment, why should I grieve when I couldn't even be sure that he was dead? For all I knew, he could still be out there, very much alive and waiting, waiting for us to come after him.

What kind of boyfriend and ally would I be if I denied him that? I stepped inside the base, throwing the firewood down onto the floor and walking through to where the others were checking the map, discussing our next move. They all looked up when they heard me, and Kobra Kid smiled.

"Hey. We were just considering heading towards Zone Eleven. There used to be a Wal-Mart up there." he informed me casually. I immediately shook my head, stopping him from going any further.

"No. I've been thinking, and there have been no confirmations that Fun Ghoul is dead yet. I think if we plan it properly, we could find him."

Kobra stood up, pushing me back out of the door by my chest, closing it behind him and staring me down. "Are you mad?!" he hissed. "Are you trying to get us killed?"

"Think about it, Kobra!" I shot back harshly. "The main Scarecrow Unit in Battery City, the front entrance is always guarded. But remember when we first went to check it out? We found a door by the West Wing, no cameras, nobody on the lookout. If we can get in through there, we could find him."

Kobra's face softened a little, and I thought I'd broken him. He was my brother after all, and with the close relationship we had, I knew he valued my happiness just as I valued his, and he would do anything to make me happy as I would for him. I couldn't shake the feeling that if we went looking for Fun Ghoul, we could also find Art Breaker and Venom Noise.

"Look, Poison. I know this whole situation is killing you. I get that, and it hurts me to see you this way. But we really can't afford to lose anyone else. Not when we still have a chance at this."

"Well, no matter how much more dangerous it will be, I'm doing this with or without your help." I reasoned, only just realizing that I was glaring at him rather cruelly. He needed to know that if I had to do this alone, I was more than prepared to do so. "So whatever. The choice is yours."