Darling, I Just Can't Go On

I found myself once more in the library waiting for Alex to show up, but in a way I almost didn't want him to show. I felt weird about how things had gone when we sat in the rain, and I didn't know if he was going to bring it up or if we would even talk about it ever again.

I sat there at the table we normally sat at in the library, fiddling with my fingers as I chewed on my bottom lip.

It wasn't until he finally arrived that the nerves really hit me.

"Hey Andi," He greeted as he sat down across from me in his normal seat.

"Hi Alex," I mumbled in response.

But that was all that was said between us, as he pulled out his notebook and started writing. I almost felt like we should be talking more now since I had opened up to him.

"What're you writing?" I asked, trying to break the awkward silence between us.

"Just some more lyrics..." He said, but trailed off as if he was considering what to say next. "Do you...Want to read them?"

I could tell that he didn't normally let people read his lyrics, at least people outside of his band, but I found myself nodding anyway.

Hesitantly he slid the notebook over to me, and the first thing I noticed was all of the little doodles in the margins surrounding the words.

I read along with the words, amazed at how well they flowed together and how deep they really were.

It didn't take me long to finish reading the page and when I finally looked back up, Alex's face showed nothing but nervousness as he kinda looked around, avoiding my eyes.

"These are really, really good Alex," I said, not able to contain the shock in my voice. "I never would have expected you to write something this amazing."

"Way to sound so surprised," He said, but I could tell that he was somewhat relieved.

~~

"Hey give me your phone," Alex said as he stood in the doorway of our 7th period class right after the bell had rung.

I normally would have just walked around him, but there was no way for me to leave.

I pulled the phone out of my back pocket slowly, not really wanting to hand it over to him.

He quickly typed his number and name into it before handing it back, walking away as soon as it was back in my hand.